10 TIPS FOR YOUNGER WOMEN

There are somethings that I see younger ladies doing that makes me cringe. Here are some tips I would love to share with my younger lady friends.

1. Be mindful of what you say and do. Not only the “what” but who you say it to. Also who you do certain things around. We want to be trusting and think everyone will be good to us. However, the reality of it is they aren’t. Not everyone has the best intentions. What we say and do will get twisted around.

2. Don’t bite your nails. This is one of my biggest pet peeves with my own daughter. I finally got through to her, to stop biting her nails. Our hands are the first thing people see outside of our teeth. Ladies when we go in to shake a persons hand, please make sure we have well manicured and moisturized hands.

3. Opt for a tight small circle of friends. Having too many people around can create unnecessary drama. Too many personalities and points of views cause tensions within the group. You never want to be in a situation where you may have to choose a side. FACTS ABOUT INTROVERTS YOU SHOULD KNOW

4. Watch your language. We all have had a slip up, but especially watching your language in public is important . You never know who’s around and who’s paying attention. Not to mention, in this digital age, you definitely will be recorded. You don’t want to miss out on a dream opportunity over non sense.

5. If your friends are talking about someone to you, they will talk about you to others. Pay attention to how your friends treat their other friends. That is a key indication of who they are.

6. Use your manners and maintain self respect. If you don’t take anything else from me, know you are watched and people take notice. Don’t get loud in stores and draw unwanted attention to yourself. Distant yourself from those who seek negative attention. Especially in public.

7. You can be sexy and not show skin. Leave something to the imagination. Unfortunately, we live in a world where you will be judged based off your appearance. Make sure what you are presenting is what you want to be interpreted.

8. Do your own research. Don’t always believe what people say. Learn for yourself so you can have your own thoughts, views, and opinions. Having your own mind will allow you to trust yourself and instincts, therefore not being able to be manipulated easily.

9. Don’t pick your skin or face. If you have a breakout, it is perfectly normal. I was guilty of this so bad. Trust me it will take you a lifetime to clear up the acne scars from picking your skin. Create a good skin care regimen, drink water, exercise, and have a good diet to help with your skin.

10. Don’t be afraid to ask for help. I have never been one shy to ask for help. It pains me to see so many people in a frenzy but won’t ask for help. We are always going to need help. Asking for help is a sign of strength.

I’m pretty sure there are a million other tips we all can think of to offer the younger ladies. Those are just a few I had in mind. If I can help a young lady have a more simple and stress fee life, then my job is done.

RosalynLynn

Be you so you can be free.

THE LONGER YOU WORRY, THE MORE TIME WASTED

Worrying is useless.The more time we spend worrying about something, the more time we are wasting. It took me a long time to realize, worrying isn’t going to change the situation. What happened has already happened and can’t be undone. Worrying isn’t going to make the time go by faster. We often think if we drive our selves crazy worrying, then time will speed up. Therefore, reaching the solution faster.

As we are wasting time worrying, we are losing sleep. Our focus is on the outcome of whatever we are worrying about. We’ve missed appointments, phone calls, and even our favorite program on television. The time we spend worrying we are frustrated, angry, and hyper sensitive. During this time, we probably have argued over something that makes no sense. In the meantime, the person we are arguing with have no idea where the anger is coming from. Furthermore, we are tense and have a short fuse, those around us feel the pressure and most likely is walking on egg shells.

Now, if we were to look back on the times we worried ourselves sick, the solution was right in front of us. The end result wasn’t as bad as we thought. The event turned out just fine. That one guest you wanted to show, showed up. On the other hand, that one guest you didn’t want to show up, didn’t. You were able to pay that bill. The financial situation worked itself out. The mistake you made really didn’t have the ripple effect you thought. That person you thought was mad at you, was going through something personal. Therefore, they needed their space.

No matter how bad you think the situation is, worrying about it is a waste of time. You worrying isn’t going to speed up the resolution. Nor is it going to change the outcome. The best thing we can do is relax. God has already won the battle for us.

The next time you find yourself worrying, pause for a moment. Remind yourself you have done all that you can do. It is out of your hands. Therefore, it is out of your control. 3 THINGS YOU CAN CONTROL Once it’s out of your control, let it go. The solution is there, you just haven’t accessed it yet. Keep yourself busy and when the solution arrives, you’ll say “I worried myself to death for nothing.”

Worrying is useless and a waste of time. I know its easier said than done, but actively try to not worry.

RosalynLynn

Be you so you can be free.

WELLNESS: EVEN THE STRONGEST NEEDS A BREAK

Just because you can handle the pressure and weight everyone places on you doesn’t mean you have to take it. The toughest and strongest of them all even needs a break. I know first hand how it feels to not want to let family and friends down, because they are counting on you. You often times feel obligated. Some of us have grown up to believe that no matter what, we’re supposed to extend and over extend because it is “family”.

Even in the workplace, you can get stretched thin because you’re so dang good, that your boss and everyone else asks you to handle tasks that isn’t your duty or responsibility. They’ve probably taken your kindness of helping them out that one time and ran with it. Now without thinking, they put “little” task off you that amount to more work. It seemly has became your duty because you’ve helped a few times and they’ve passed the buck. Less compensation. Little appreciation.

Now please note, it doesn’t mean they don’t want to help or be there for others. Those that are strong would love to have their loved ones show some love, care, and concern in return. Ask them how their day is going. What’s going on in their world. Are they overwhelmed. Do they need anything. Even it they say no, just the simple genuine ask means the world.

No one ever thinks it’s a problem or you’re stressed because you’re good add hiding your frustration. Or, you’re so nice and kind, they think you don’t mind. At this point so much time has passed that it’s almost impossible to let someone know you’re no longer available mentally, emotionally, or physically like you used to. Setting some boundaries for someone who hasn’t had any, can be difficult. You may fear rejections, lost of friendship, relationship, or even awkward work space. So you convince yourself over and over again you can take it. That only leads to resentment and dissolutions of relationship that may not be able to be repaired.

I had to learn to accept that just because I can handle it, I don’t have to take on that load. It is difficult to tell someone to keep that load to yourself knowing you can help or assist them greatly.

But if you don’t give yourself a break, no one else will. Set those boundaries upfront. Make it clear what you will do and how far you will go. We all know you are strong and you can handle what is thrown at you more easy than others. It won’t be a sign of weakness if you were to say, not today. I need to do this for me. Eventually they will get the hint.

Being mentally and emotionally strong, it is important to communicate your feelings. Those that are mentally and emotionally strong suffer in silence sometimes. They feel no one will understand them. Because everyone is depending and pulling on them, they don’t want to burden anyone with their stress. Or feel like they can pour onto someone that is in need themselves. People know you can handle it, so they don’t think anything phases you. And because they have no idea how tired you are, they think you’re made of cement. Remember we teach people how to treat us.

So if you are the one people go to, give yourself a break. You are still going to be strong. Setting limits and taking a break is exercising great strength. STRENGTH If you know someone who carries the weight of the world on their shoulders reach out to them. Check up on them from time to time. It will be greatly appreciate it.

RosalynLynn

Be you so you can be free.

MENTAL HEALTH: YOU ALREADY HAVE BEEN VALIDATED

If we look around the validation we’re seeking is in front of our faces. You have already been validated. God sends you validation in many forms. We must hear and see in the spirit. As my grandmother would say when I was younger, if it was a snake, it would’ve bit you.

So often we look for validation when we’re experiencing different emotions. Or, we may seek validation when we begin a new venture of some sort. However, in my experience, the validation is already there.

The validation could come from someone you least expect. We often seek validation from family and friends, but God will send your enemy to give you a boost of encouragement. Don’t look at it as the person is being nosy or want something from you. God is telling you to go for it, because you are going to inspire the one person you least expect.

You have already been validated when you read that message that pops up on your phone. You know, the one that makes you say “hmmm” or “that is a coincidence”. That is God saying you have everything you need. You have been seeking from places that can’t give you what you need. GOD IS A KEEPER

When your friend or family member send you a inspirational message, that’s God saying you have been validated. He uses his resources wisely. If you come across a passage and it hits you differently, then that is your validation confirmation.

When I say validation, it could be you worried about switching jobs. Have you decided to move away and you are worried if its the right decision. You may seek validation from setting some boundaries and you want to make sure you’re doing the right thing. You could need affirmation to make a decision that would effect you financially. Just look, its already there. Any way you stand up for yourself and it scares you, its been validated already.

This thought of already being validated came to me when I was worried about if I made the right decision on something . But for several days, I came across messages and inspirational videos that let me know I was doing the right thing. Every morning for a couple of days, my morning message that I read, would have something to do with my decision. I had to stop and think to myself, this isn’t popping up by coincidence, this is God telling me to stop worrying, you made the right decision.

If you are struggling with a decision or feel you’re not receiving the validation you need, stop and look around you. I guarantee you, that you’ve been affirmed and validated. Get in tuned with your spirit. It won’t steer you wrong.

RosalynLynn

Be you so you can be free.

MY HOPE FOR YOU: BIRTHDAY MOTIVATION

My hope for you is that you find the strength, courage, and passion you desire to live the life you want. As I sit here and enjoy my day off on my birthday 🎉 , I wanted to encourage at least one person to be themselves freely. Do You Have A Vision For Your Life

There is nothing more fulfilling than to be able to wake up everyday and be excited. You are excited because you are grateful. My hope for you is that you are excited because you are going to the job of your dreams. I want you to have excitement because you have accomplished your weight loss goal. You should get excited about waking up, seeing the sunshine, being able to walk, and to have breath in your body.

I set out this last year to take risks, set boundaries, and be of service. I am very happy and grateful God has given me the Grace to do so. But I’m more excited because I’m learning and growing in what my purpose and mission is. I know what I want to offer and bring into every situation or person I encounter.

On this day or whatever day you are reading this, I hope you forgive and let go of whatever is holding you back from being free. Give yourself a gift of freedom and happiness. The best thing I heard this week was “If your life don’t turn out the way you want it to, then you are the only person that has to deal with it.”-MJ Harris.

In this one life, we don’t get do overs. No matter if you do what others want you to or do what you want, someone is going to always have something to say. So why not live for you anyway. You have nothing to lose.

My hope for you is that you take one small step of faith. What do you hope for? How do you envision yourself living? Whatever the answer to those questions are, make it a goal by your next birthday to have achieved the vision. Step out on faith and give yourself a gift on your next birthday. Make it realistic and obtainable.

Using your birthday as a goal date is a great way to self reflect. By each birthday we want to have grown, achieved, or made progress. This day you won’t forget. And because it is your birthday, you will be more inspired and motivated to achieve your goal.

Have a great day!!!!!!

RosalynLynn

Be you so you can be free.

Monday morning check in

It’s the top of the week and it’s time to check ourselves. Monday morning check in is when you set into motion your goals for the week. On Monday morning, its good to give yourself a road map of what you want to accomplish this week.

Starting off with your mental health goals. Is there anything stressing you? Have you been constantly replaying a situation or scenario that has taken place? Are there any relationships that are fragile that has your anxiety up? Think about your mental status and be honest with yourself. Make a decision to tackle one thing head on this week. We can’t tackle every obstacle at once. But with every step and stride we will conquer and over come.

That goes for your professional life as well. Many times we are stressed about work and it carry over into our personal life. What is it that you want to leave behind that happened at work last week? How do you want to approach your work week? It’s always good to leave last week in the past. Make a decision that you aren’t going to let your coworkers trigger you. What is on your calendar that has you stressed at work. How can you conquer that?

We just had a holiday, Mother’s Day. So we ate pretty good and probably had some drinks as well. Which is what you’re supposed to do, have a good time and enjoy yourself. Now its time to get back to the grind. It’s Monday, now lets get that work out in. Have you been keeping up with your fitness goals or do as much physical activity as you can? Set some exercise goals this week. Get back at it. We all know how important exercise and physical activity is for our mental and emotional health. Take a stroll to clear your head and refocus.

Next, your spiritual health. This Monday morning make it a point to center and ground yourself. Fill yourself up for the week with positive messages, reading, inspirations, and happiness. The more we ground ourselves and deepen our Faith the more we are able to push through a speed bump. God didn’t say we wouldn’t have difficulties, but he has given us the strength to move through. Remember we must move through to get the lesson and wisdom. If we attempt to avoid or move around we will miss the lesson and the blessing. SELF CARE: WHAT’S YOUR MOTIVATION

Lastly our emotional health. Positive thoughts, energy, and affirmations are a requirement to keep us sane. The love we show ourselves must be so heavy that no one can get to our flesh. Get in the habit of creating yourself a safe space. We have to constantly check our surroundings and who we share the same space with. Making sure we have good people with good intentions are essential to your emotional wellbeing.

It’s Monday morning check in. How are you feeling about the week ahead? What are your plans for the week? Time is flying by and we must make sure we are in tune and check ourselves regularly. This is going to be a great week. No one is going to push my buttons or get me out of character. They will not have that power over me. I’m going to go in with a positive attitude even when the circumstances aren’t positive. I will seek the positive in every situation. However, there is a lesson to be learned no matter what the out come may be. If things doesn’t work out how I want them to or envision, I know to keep pressing forward.

Talk yourself up. Give yourself a pep talk every morning. Until it becomes habit. Eventually you’ll get to a comfortable place in your being.

Happy Monday everyone and have a great week!!!!!

RosalynLynn

Be you so you can be free.

SINGLE MOM SELF CARE TIPS: SIMPLE AND EASY

To all my single moms out there, you guys rock !!!!! However, single mom self care is vital to your well being. Yes, you can practice self care if you are a single mom. Furthermore, you deserve a moment, you are doing an amazing job, and single mom self care is possible, here are some easy and effective tips for you.

In No Particular Order…

You already possess the time ⏰ needed to practice self care. Get rid of the idea that you don’t have time because you don’t have a partner. You just have to allocate your time differently. Believe and know you have what you need.
Scheduling 📝 and using a calendar 📅 will make your life easier to manage. Use a calendar to keep up with activities 🤾🏽‍♂️, appointments, and other obligations. Be sure to adjust the time if the appointment changes. Schedule everything. Your hair 💇🏾‍♀️appointment. Nail 💅🏾 appointment. Spa appointment. Even schedule exercise.
Piggy backing off of single mom self care tip # 2, exercise 🧘🏾‍♀️is a must for you. It’s more for your mental and emotional health than anything. Use this time to get creative and do different classes 🤽🏾‍♀️. There are many resources online to take advantage of and do with friends. That way you are exercising, having some time with friends, and getting a break from the kids at the same time.
This probably should have been first, but wake 🛌 up before the kids 👩‍👧‍👦. Use the hour or two before they wake up to just sit and be. Shower and get ready for work in peace. Have a cup of coffee. Check emails in peace. Meditate. Read. Pray.
Make plans to go out. Have a set time, rather it’s once a month 📅or weekly. Whatever you need to fulfill your need to socialize with adults, do so.
I’ve said it once, I’ll say it again, get creative. Find a hobby🎨 or something that sparks your interest. Keep your mind going and have something substantial to occupy your time.
Volunteer. Be of service👩🏾‍💻 to something or someone. While you’re lending a helping hand to someone else your spirit is being filled. On the plus side, you get to meet amazing new people.
Have a date with the 👩‍👧‍👧kids. Get them out the house and do something fun. Learn their interest and what’s on their mind as they are growing. A different scenery🏖 for the family will open everyone up.
Meal prep. Make your life easy with planning 🥗meals. This avoid eating out as well as keeping the family on a healthy lifestyle.
Rest, relax, and 🛋take a day off. Give yourself some credit and plan a day off to do nothing. Do so while they are at school. You can binge watch all day in peace in quiet. How To Boost Your Confidence With Daily Self Care

Bonus Tip: Kiss the kids every night.

These are just a few quick and easy self care tips any single mom can do. It doesn’t matter what your budget is or where you live. Know that you worthy and deserving. You are an amazing parent. Most importantly your kids will benefit from you practicing self care. So go ahead do what you need to do to make yourself feel good.

RosalynLynn

Be you so you can be free.

KEEP GOING AND PUSH YOURSELF

**It is very easy for us to get discouraged and second guess certain decisions when we hit a bump in the road or face a set back. No matter what we must keep going and push ourselves. Whatever it is that you’re facing in your business, education, family, work, or finances its only temporary. Please know that when we make a decision to become a better version of ourselves thats when we really know who is in our corner cheering for us. As well as those who are sitting back watching waiting for us to fall. When you begin to face criticism, setbacks, and obstacles know that, that is a sign you’re doing exactly what you’re supposed to. They wouldn’t fight you if you had nothing to lose and nothing to offer. Keep Going!!!!!

**However, during this time it is perfectly normal to question if you should have went back to school, started that business, or began a wellness journey to better yourself. You now question if its all worth it. On one hand you may begin to compare your process with someone else. No matter what keep going and push through. Next you may begin to feel like the whole world is against you. The support you thought you’d receive is far minimal than expected, and the feeling of being in over your head is all normal. But the key is to push through those thoughts and use the rejection, criticism, and obstacles as motivation. Tough times don’t last. You will get through. Keep going!!!!!!

**Push yourself through obstacles and challenges. No matter how high that mountain is in front of you or how deep you are in the water push through. You’re going to be challenged and want to give up, but Keep Going!!!!!!

**You’ve made it this far. Don’t waste the time, money, and resources you’ve put into it thus far. Keep going and fulfill whatever it is that’s in your heart. You’ve got what it takes. The hard part was getting over that fear and starting. Keep Going!!!!

RosalynLynn

Be you so you can be free.

WHAT I’VE LEARNED THIS YEAR ABOUT MYSELF

As we approach the middle of March, I’m having thoughts of what happened just a year ago. What I’ve learned about myself and my personal growth this year has been obvious, to me. This pandemic has been a blessing in disguise if you seek the positive. Yes, there are some positive things we can pull from this year. I’ve even said to my kids “you know guys at this time last year when ya’ll went on spring break, you never returned.”

At this time last year, we all went through a lot. I’ve said in a previous post the same time we went into quarantine both of our vehicles were totaled due to a severe hail storm. I remember when the storm happened we felt completely deflated and had no idea what we were going to do. My husband and I looked at each other and said “welp, we just going to take it day by day.” Which leads me to five lessons on what I’ve learned this year about myself:

Slow Down

You’ve heard me say it before over this past year, that God sent a clear message he wanted us to slow down, live in the moment, and enjoy the families He gifted us with. Being constantly busy doesn’t mean you’re living. In actuality, especially children, want you home and available. Children want that structure and disciplined home even if they don’t seem like they want it. Just sitting and being with one another is more valuable than anything. Those are the memorable moments that will be talked about years from now. Create moments.

Make Myself A Priority

As a mom and wife I’ve been guilty of putting myself on the back burner to ensure they are taken care of and have everything they need. Along with taking care of myself, I had to get over feeling bad about it. This year I quickly got over that feeling of guilt. Now I make it a point to watch a tv program, get a spa treatment, take care of my hair and nails, and treat myself. Honestly, thats what my husband and kids would want me to do.

Ask For What You Want

Another hard lesson for us all, is to ask for what I want and not be shy about it. Have you ever compromised or blatantly not said what you really wanted? But you see someone else get exactly what they want and then you get upset with them? What I’ve learned this year is to not compromise myself at the expense of someone else. This is very difficult for many of us. When someone asks you what you want, say unapologetically what it is you want or need. They are asking you for a reason and we owe it to ourselves as well as the person asking to be honest

Protect My Mental and Emotional Wellbeing

This year I’ve really been consistent and good at identifying what’s good for my mental health and what triggers me. Protecting my peace and calmness has been a major priority and focus. To do so, I had to not feel bad or worry about hurting others feelings in the process. I am no longer afraid or shy to exit a situation or place to prevent it from raising my blood pressure. Therefore I haven’t been as tense and on edge.

Career and Financial Goals

The last thing that has become clear is my career and financial goals that I’d like to achieve. For the first time this year, I’ve verbally stated aloud what I’d like to do in the near future career wise. Side Note: I will share my career goal when I reach it, I’m a firm believer in not sharing until it has manifested. Financially, I’ve become diligent in educating myself to ensure we are as financially responsible and financially literate as we can be.

There is no doubt that we all had a life lesson this year, some good and some bad. No matter where you may fall, we all can learn something. It’s very important to reflect and see how far you’ve come. Reflecting can provide direction, clarity, and understanding. What has this past year taught you about yourself?

RosalynLynn

Be you so you can be free.

YOU CONTROL YOUR OWN DESTINY

As a mom of two teenagers I’m constantly trying to figure out ways to encourage, inspire, and motivate them. So I use our morning car ride to drop “mommy gems”. Today’s mommy gem was “you control your own destiny”. Especially for teens it’s important to remind them of the ole saying, “always be a leader, never a follower.” Remember they are teenagers so I have to be quick and to the point. I thought I share todays gem as we all can use it no matter our age.

Today’s Mommy Gem:

“Never let anyone pressure you into doing something you don’t want to. When I say anyone, that goes for teacher, coach, friend, family, and anyone who is in an adult leadership role over you. If it doesn’t feel right in your heart, mind, spirit, or soul then don’t do it. Never let someone else make you feel a certain way because you’re not doing what they think you should. You control your own destiny. God created you the way He wanted you and He has given you what you needed to live the life He set forth. Therefore, no one else can control you unless you allow them. In the same token, no one can take what God has placed in you and for you. An Open Letter To Anyone You are enough

Also when you make your decision to stand in who you are don’t feel bad if you find yourself out there on a limb alone sometimes. No one else can push us better than we push ourselves. That’s when we find our greatest strength. So go have a great day and be great.”

As I was driving I thought someone out there need to hear this, this morning. Go be great today. Be the person God created you to be with no regrets. You control your own destiny in life.

RosalynLynn

Be you so you can be free.