WE HAVE THE POWER TO MAKE A CHOICE

You have a super power, and that is, your choice. The choice is yours in every situation you encounter. This is another mommy gem I tell my kids consistently. You have a choice. Now depending on what choice you make, the consequences or outcome can be drastically different.

The power you have in choice begins with the mind. OPEN YOUR MIND FOR UNDERSTANDING You have the choice to walk away from a job or career. The choice is yours to stay in a relationship. We have choices on where we want to live. The choice is ours to make on what we eat. However, with any of the above, we can put ourselves in a financial bind if we don’t have a back up plan. On the other hand, if we leave a relationship we have to be ready to have lonely times. Our lifestyle and how we live depends on where we choose to live and what we have access to. The food choices we make can cause health problems or increase our energy.

In the meantime, we have a choice to be sad. It’s a choice we made to dwell on what someone said. We can’t change what they said but we can choose to think about we say about ourselves. We can choose to do something that makes up happy, instead of thinking about the dark. It doesn’t mean those situations are insignificant. But making the choice to choose better, allows you to go through the dark to get to the light.

We have a choice to hold a grudge or forgive. You can forgive, free yourself, and them. You have a choice to not participate if you don’t want to. The choice is yours to say “yes” or “no”. How we handle conflict and arguments is a choice. The language and words we speak to ourselves and others are important. Furthermore, the choice to apologize is ours. Just letting things go and be, is a choice. JUST LET IT GO

”I have to do this.”
“I have to stay.”
”There is no other option or choice.”
”What else am I going to do?”

We’ve all said this in some fashion at one point in time. But the reality is, you have a power called choice. Yes, if you make a certain choice in one direction, the hill to climb may seem steep. However, if the choice was there and the opportunity, then you have everything you need to climb that steep hill. You will not be led to a decision or choice that doesn’t serve you good.

The hardest, toughest, and most challenging choice will lead us to a life and world we couldn’t imagine. Trust yourself, the process, and God to lead you.

So the next time you find yourself stuck, remember you have a choice. It’s your super power. No one can make you do anything. You have the power to change the narrative, course of your life, and your story. The only person that can write our story is us.

We can make our lives better and easier, with knowing we have a choice. Making the choice that is best for your mental, emotional, and physical wellbeing will always lead you to being better. The healthier we are, the more we’ll be able to serve others.

RosalynLynn

Be you so you can be free.

HAPPY HUMP DAY!!! YOU’LL GET OVER THE HUMP

It’s hump day!!!! I tell my kids every Wednesday, ”you almost done with the week. Once you get over hump day, you’ll running to the finish line.” Happy hump day everyone!!!!

I just want everyone to know if there is any kind of hump in your life that you are trying to get over, you’re almost there. Don’t give up, keep going!!!! It gets the toughest when you are almost at the finish line. You have the strength to pull through. EVEN THE STRONGEST NEEDS A BREAK

When you are at your lowest, weakest, and just can’t take it any more, the breakthrough is coming. Please believe and know you are stronger, bigger, tougher, and wiser than any obstacle you are facing. No matter if it’s a physical hump, mental hump, emotional hump, financial hump, relationship hump, or work hump. You will conquer and see through to the other side.

Has it been challenging? YES!!!!!! Have you taken all you can take? YES!!!!!! There have been tears shed. You have screamed, shut down, and stressed yourself to no end. But, hold on because it’s hump day and there isn’t a hump big enough to hold you down.

You’ve been here before. Remember?!?! There was another time you thought you weren’t going to get through, and you did. Think back, and pull from that strength. Rememeber how you felt when you finally conquered and got over the hump. Expect and anticipate the victory of WINNING!!!!!!

In the meantime, be patient, pray, and do your best. The rest has been worked out already. Remember it’s not our timing that is the best timing.

So on this hump day, go be great. Be your best self. Tough times don’t last. You will outlast any hump that you face today, tomorrow, next week, next month, or next year. We will have humps. But it’s how we climb that hump and what we do in the process that makes it manageable.

Have a great day!!!! Happy Hump Day!!!!!

RosalynLynn

Be you so you can be free.

SELF CARE: LOOKS AND FEEL DIFFERENT ON EVERYONE

I bet there are many people who see self care as stressful and complex. In actuality it isn’t. Self care looks and feel different for everyone. Everyone idea of self care is different and unique to them. On the other hand, there are some who don’t even practice self care. Let’s be perfectly honest, not everyone is suffering from depression, anxiety, or mental fatigue. Nor do you need to suffer from anything to practice self care.

If you aren’t a morning person then you don’t have to wake up at 5a.m. If your morning begins at 7a.m. or 10a.m. then that is perfect for you. Whatever your schedule is and what your schedule allows you to do then do it. Most people wake up at 5a.m. to get things done uninterrupted. Many people use that time to get some alone time to themselves. But if your alone time is at night then that works for you. As long as you get the proper amount of sleep and rest. What Self Care Is NOT

A great self care activity is reading. However, not everyone is a reader. I can read a book like clock work, but my husband not so much. He prefers to read several articles or passages. Either way he get his reading in. If you’re not a reader then that if perfectly fine. There are many other ways to get your brain activity stimulated. Just because many articles suggest reading as a self care activity, doesn’t mean to force yourself to read.

Self care doesn’t have to be stressful and it isn’t. If you aren’t a planner then don’t buy a planner and feel the need to use it. Some people are natural planners and that works for them. If you use your phone or like to wing it, then that is your business. No one can tell you it’s wrong.

If you like to pray or meditate in the afternoon instead of morning that is your business. Self care is for self. I journal but not everyday, and that works for me. My workout is later in the evening, opposed to morning. I like to use my mornings to get things done.

Self care shouldn’t be stressful for you. You have the right to indulge in self care or not. Take the inspiration and implement it in your life how you see fit. If you try something and it doesn’t suit you, oh well. The goal is to ensure you are your best self for you.

Lastly, no one practices self care 365 24/7. Live your life to be the best you you can be.

RosalynLynn

Be you so you can be free.

YOU HAVE EVERYTHING YOU NEED TO START YOUR FITNESS JOURNEY

We all have the best intentions to live the life we envision. But we never really get to live out our dream life because of the excuses we’ve come to tell ourselves. The reality is, we already have everything we need to live the life we envision. No matter if you are wanting to reset, begin, or change directions. You already have everything you need to live your life.

The first obvious is the fitness journey. We make excuses for why we have to wait until next week, month, or year. But did you ever notice, you can definitely achieve your goal to fit in a dress or for that special event coming up. Why, because you put your mind to it. Why Mindset Is Everything Mindset is everything here. So you can begin your weight loss goal even if you don’t have the gym membership money, workout clothes, shoes, equipment, or space in your home.

If don’t have room in your budget to pay for a membership, use Gods resources. Going outside you can walk your neighborhood, go to the local park, walk downtown, walk the trails, or use the steps in your home if you have them. ”I can’t do that. It’s cold where I live. We don’t have sidewalks. The neighborhood isn’t safe.” Well here’s another option, YouTube. There are millions of fitness videos on the tube, for every level, body part, and need. “I live in a small apartment.” I’m glad you said that. Because I don’t have a basement but I have a large kitchen and I would push my tabel to the side and use my floor to workout for 45 minutes. Use your living room floor. I’ve even used my bedroom as a place to workout .

Everyone has a phone, IPAD, or some kind of device to prop up to workout. Another good way to get in a workout and add variety in going on Pinterest. They have a ton of workout material for you to get started.

Ok you don’t have clothes or shoes, use what you already have. I don’t have a wardrobe of workout outfits. But I do have some old shorts, sweats, and t-shirts that I rotate to workout in. I’m sweating them out anyway. I don’t need to spend a large amount of money on workout clothes to prove I’m serious about my fitness. Also I use an old pair of sneakers to workout in. Once again, they are for getting dirty and I’m sweating in them.

Lastly, you don’t have a lot of wiggle room in grocery budget. That is fine. To begin, cut all your portions in half. The goal is to burn more than you intake. Make sure you have breakfast though. You can also cut out the soda, juice, and any other sugary drinks that you consume. Cut the sweets down. Drink more water. And guess what, you will notice a huge difference.

As time goes on you’ll be able to add or get whatever you need to continue on with your fitness. Remember fitness is a journey. You have to consistently work at it, add variety, and listen to your body. It’s a lifestyle that you must adopt.

The good news is you already have everything you need. 3 THINGS I STOP DOING TO HELP ME MENTALLY AND EMOTIONALLY You even have time. Make it a priority and you’ll begin to see results.

RosalynLynn

Be you so you can be free.

3 THINGS YOU MAY NEVER GET AND HAVE TO BE OK WITH

There are certain things in life that we expect and want. However, there are a couple of things that we have to be ok with never receiving.

The first is an apology. I’ve come to learn and accept in certain situations an apology isn’t going to happen. If the apology has to be asked for then you probably better off not getting it. Some people may not see a reason to apologize for many reasons. Either they aren’t remorseful or they don’t see anything of what they did was wrong. Most likely if you have to explain or twist yourself so they see your point of view and hurt, then if the apology does happen you’ll most likely feel its not from the heart.

The best way to deal with that is to know your role, apologize for your part, if any, and adjust the distance in that relationship going forward. We all want the apology we receive to be genuine and from the heart. If it’s anything other, its going to create a spiral of emotional arguments.

The next thing we may never get is the void we feel from a particular person. This could be a parent, sibling, or partner. Who ever we may seek love, affection, and validation from that is missing, we have to understand it’s not going to happen. First of all, the time that you needed and wanted it the most has passed. Therefore, it won’t mean the same or weigh as much. Because the 8 year old in you is looking for something, the 35 year old won’t be able to receive it the same. And that is perfectly ok.

The best way to move forward is acknowledge what it is or was you needed. But don’t blame said person. Because guess what, if they knew better they would have done better. Maybe you are asking something from someone that they don’t have, can’t give, or never received it. Understanding the other persons background and story will allow you to have empathy. OPEN YOUR MIND FOR UNDERSTANDING Whatever it is you are lacking or seeking, give it away abundantly.

The last thing that we may have to be ok with never receiving is closure. When wanting closure or answers we have to be careful. Most often waiting for closure and answers are holding us hostage from moving forward. Questioning why and wondering about different outcomes is preventing us from learning the lesson and growing from the experience. We’ve heard it a million times, if God put a period on something don’t you go trying to make it a comma.

When you don’t have answers or closure, focus on yourself. How you can be a better person to yourself and others. Learning triggers and behaviors in others so you won’t put yourself in certain positions again.

There is a lot we are going to get out of this one life we have. On the other hand, we will lack certain things. Either way, we must know we are still worthy of all our hearts desires, hopes, and dreams. Of course each person or circumstance will differ. But these are three things that most of us hold our breath for.

RosalynLynn

Be you so you can be free.

WELLNESS: YOUR TRUTH IS YOURS

The truth will set you free is something we’ve heard a million times. But what does it really mean? Your truth is yours. Simply. The truth about your experiences. Truth about your feelings. The truth about your thoughts and emotions. Your truth is yours and no one can tell you its a lie or you’re wrong.

Your truth is yours and you must own it like you own your house or car. The one revelation I had this past weekend is telling the honest gut truth, will release and relieve you. The key is to not give a surface answer. You know when we say things like, “I feel some type of way.” What way? What are you feeling? Or when we say, ”I don’t like what they said.” Who said what? Is it how they said it? When they said it? Was it the intentions or context of what they said? In order to get better and heal from the tear, we have to say what the injury is so it can be treated correctly.

I had a moment this weekend with a family member who I previously expressed a feeling and concern to. They took what I said and immediately through it in my face the first chance they got a a moment. I had to ask myself why was I mad, angry, upset, hurt, and crying. It wasn’t that they repeated or brought up my moment of vulnerability. It was the fact they intentionally used it like a knife to hurt me. The conversation had nothing to with what I told them. But at the ready, they had it locked and loaded ready to use against me at the first moment they could.

That’s what hurt. I don’t feel guilty or bad about expressing my true feelings to them. I still believe and stand by my feelings. The act of intentionally trying to make my feelings or experience wrong, inaccurate, or not valid is what hurt. Especially coming from someone I love and I want love from. See there is another truth. I had to say, yes I want love and affection from them. Even though they hurt me, I still love them, wish them well, and want nothing but good things for them in their life.

So when I say tell the truth and it will set you free, it will. Once I said exactly what made me upset, I felt ok with moving forward. I don’t feel like I need clarity, an apology, or hold any bad feelings. Because I do know hurt people, hurt people. I can see their pain and why they wanted me to feel as hurt as them. Even though it had nothing to do with me.

No matter what truth you need to speak, say it loudly. If its regarding your job, say exactly what you don’t like. What are you lacking from your job or career that you need and want? Your truth about your relationship or marriage, speak it. Be specific and detailed about your truth so you can be set free. YOU OWE YOU…FIRST The truth about your finances, home life, lifestyle, or anything that you need to be honest with yourself about, speak it. You won’t learn what to do next if you don’t tell the truth. I’ts like going to the doctor complainig about your knee, when your arm is actually what’s bothering you.

Just like forgiveness is for you, your truth is yours and is for you. Speak your truth so you can heal, grow, and be better for yourself. Your truth isn’t wrong.

RosalynLynn

Be you so you can be free.

MOTIVATIONAL: HOW I STAY MOTIVATED AND INSPIRED

Just like everyone else, I have my moments. I juggle many responsibilities and roles so staying motivated and inspired is a daily priority for me. Not to mention, my main purpose of starting a blog is to let everyone else know they have everything they need to live their true self.REMEMBERING WHY I BLOG, Motivation

As a quick background, I went through a depression because I was living the life everyone else thought I should be living. I wanted to make everyone happy and proud but I wasn’t receiving the love and support needed to be “me”. After about a 3 year period of distancing myself, I began seeking encouragement and motivation constantly. What I quickly realized was, I had to keep my gas tank full.

My positive thoughts, energy, mood, vibe, goals, self care, and anything else was dependent on my gas tank. I knew I had to stay prayed up, read up, and full of gratitude to fight off any negative response of my choice to live for me. Always keeping my gas tank full, allows me to have an abundance to pull from whenever I need reinforcement, reassurance, and a reset.

For starters, I only seek positive and motivational content. So starting my day off with prayer before I get out of bed is essential. Before I even begin my day, telling God thank you and putting out in the universe how great the day is going to be sets the tone. Even on days I don’t feel good or have a busy schedule I make it a point to be grateful.

From there, as I get myself together, I put on something inspirational. Most of the time I go for a YouTube video. Some of my favorites are Joel Osteen, Joyce Meyer, Eric Thomas, and Sarah Jakes Roberts. I ensure to fill my spirit with positivity, gratitude, and happiness. The goal is to have my gas tank filled so no matter what I may encounter through the day, it won’t stick to me. Now if I don’t watch a video, then I’ll opt for a gospel radio station.

Side Note: Music period always puts me in a good mood. At work, I will have music playing low at my desk. That is to drown out the negative talk from my coworkers, keep me in a good mood, and have my focus on something positive.

Next, while I’m riding in the car I’ll listen to more inspirational messages from YouTube or a podcast. Of, course music is always an option of mine as well. Throughout the day, I scroll Pinterest for millions of motivational quotes and passages. No matter what mood you are feeling you can read a quote or passage that will pick you back up.

Now if I’m in a mood, I quickly remind myself that it’s temporary. I ask myself “Ros why are you really hurt, or why did that comment bother you so much?” I’ve really got to a point where I’m honest with my feelings no matter how uncomfortable it is. I try to understand what made someone react, respond, or say whatever they did. OPEN YOUR MIND FOR UNDERSTANDING Knowing another’s story and pain allows me to have sympathy and empathy. But be clear, that doesn’t mean I give them the grace to do it again.

I’ve really worked hard to get to know me. What I like, my expectations, my boundaries, my cutoffs, and I don’t make excuses or apologize for them. I also make it clear so there aren’t any misunderstandings or confusion. One of the biggest obstacles that help me is saying “NO”. I will no longer put myself in uncomfortable situations to make others happy or to keep the peace.

In the evening, I once again express gratitude. I made it through the day. Most often we have encounters throughout the day and we get stuck. If something happens to us at 11:20a.m. we get stuck there and the rest of our day is ruined. Nothing lasts forever and its not the end of the world if things don’t go how you planned.

Lastly, a little while ago, I made a commitment to remove complaining from my thoughts and brain. Only if we knew the negative ramifications of constantly complaining. Even if its something small, complaining is a cancer that grows and spreads to infect every other aspect of our life.

As long as I’m intentional with my choices through the day, I share the inspiration and motivation, and I make someone else feel good then I’ve done my job. But how to stay motivated and inspired, you have to make it a part of your daily being, habits, and lifestyle. Seek the good and it will come to you.

So the next time someone says something that hurt your feelings, someone cut you off, don’t respond emotionally look for something to remind you of your purpose. Those are distractions to get you off tract from your journey. How I stay motivated and inspired will be different from others and may change as I grow.

RosalynLynn

Be you so you can be free.

SOMETIMES WE JUST OUTGROW RELATIONSHIPS

Sometimes we outgrow relationships and that’s ok. People come into our lives for a reason. No matter how well they develop or dissolve we outgrow the relationship. It’s perfectly normal and ok to outgrow some relationships.

If we outgrow a relationship that doesn’t mean its a bad thing. Two people have grown into two separate paths that doesn’t aline. The career path we choose takes us into different directions. Furthermore, any distance apart can help the relationship outgrow. The personal life we lead, takes us into different directions. LOVE YOURSELF MORE THAN ANYONE ELSE

Not everyone is meant to be in our lives forever. We would love to have that one friend since childhood. Or that college roommate that kept us company. Hey Beal. Luv U!!!!! I’m so blessed and grateful to still have my college roommate in my life. But anyway, just because we outgrow a relationship doesn’t mean you’re not going to ever talk to them again. It just means the things you used to have in common isn’t shared.

We don’t just outgrow relationships, we may outgrow the job we’ve been at for years. I’ve heard people say they outgrew their hairstyle. Also one may outgrow the neighborhood their in and want to move. We outgrow the music we listen to, the television shows we watch, and personal style preferences. It’s ok.

I know for me, something as simple as what I like to eat has drastically changed. My tolerance level for certain foods isn’t as high. My choice in music has shifted. I always say if it hurts my ears I can’t listen to it. How I like to entertain myself most people would probably think its boring. I enjoy being different, taking a risk, and challenging myself.

We aren’t supposed to stay the same day after day. Year after after. As we grow our taste changes. What we want and like shifts and adjusts. Also our point of view transform as we grow. So of course we would outgrow some relationships. I know its hard, but growth of any kind is good.

However, if someone isn’t happy, excited, or encourage you to keep going then you know the time has expired on that relationship. I know its scary but you’re going to develop some amazing new relationships along the way.

RosalynLynn

Be you so you can be free.

MOTIVATIONAL: GET UP AND GET TO WORK

Get up and get to work. Ok, so you’ve lost your job. There was an misunderstanding and you had a huge falling out with your best friend. On top of all that, your kid is running a muck. Not to mention, you have broken up with your boyfriend/girlfriend. Or your marriage has fallen apart. The hot water heater has went out, the washer is broken, and you’ve had a flood in the basement. The only thing you are thinking is what the bleep else can go wrong.

Now that it seems the world literally has crashed upon you, you are ready to throw in the towel and give up. Oh no we not!!!!!!!! You’ve had a moment to scream, cry, and lay in the pit of darkness. But I know it won’t get better if you continue to lay in the darkness. You have to find the light. However, if you can’t find the light, create your light.

Get up and get to working on yourself. Clean yourself up mentally. Daily Self Care Habits To Boost Your Mental Health If someone isn’t on board with your vision for yourself mentally and emotionally, then you have to love them from a distance. Furthermore, as you walk toward your new light, you are going to have to leave people where they are stuck at. Everyone can’t go with you. You can’t pull someone who isn’t ready or who doesn’t want to go.

If its time for you to explore a new career path, then you need to do so. I know for me, when I get bored and unmotivated the tasks aren’t challenging. It’s time for me to move on to something that will challenge me and get me excited about working. If you wake up in the morning and dread going to work, then you aren’t being fulfilled.

No matter what you’re carrying on your shoulders, drop it and move on. Have your moment and mourn the loss of it. But after that, its time to get up and get to work.No one can change your life but you. If you continue to sit in the dark, its only going to effect you.

Don’t worry about who did what. Or what someone did that helped you get into a situation. We must take personal responsibility. Own and admit to the role we played in our downfall. Once we take ownership, we take back authority and control. Leaving the responsibility in someone else’s hands, leaves us handicapped in taking action towards getting our life back.

I know it hurt like no other pain you’ve felt. I know you feel empty, lost, and saying I have nothing to even begin. But guess what, you do. Your will to live, get better, and grow is all you need. Once you make up in your mind, this is not the end for me, you’ll find what you need to pull yourself out.

Get up and get to work. You can do it. Remember its not what happens to you, but how you handle it.

RosalynLynn

Be you so you can be free.

SELF CARE TIPS FOR WOMEN OVER 40

I’ve reached chapter 40 and there are noticeable changes that happens to you mentally, emotionally, and physically. Based off some of the differences I’ve noticed there are a couple self care tips for mature women that goes beyond mani pedis and spa days.

Tip#1

Read More. Keeping the brain stimulated which helps with connectivity helps keeps focus and attention . The more we read the more we expand our vocabulary and comprehension. Reading more as mature women allows us to relax and take a moment for ourselves. Therefore, reducing our stress and blood pressure. Opting to read keeps our mind focus on positive thoughts and feelings.

Tip#2

Teach, Inspire, and Motivate. Lately I’ve had the urge to encourage and motivate the younger ladies. Because we have experienced life more and went through some storms, it’s important to educate the younger ladies on the obstacles they may face. Giving back with wisdom and lessons you learned on the way will be more appreciated than you expect. Motivate and inspire a younger lady to go after her dreams. Uplifting someone else is free to do with a priceless reward. 10 TIPS FOR YOUNGER WOMEN

Tip#3

Moisture, Moisture, Moisture. As we get older our skin loses it’s elasticity. Us mature women need to keep our hands, feet, face, and neck well moisturized. The most significant signs of aging are seen in our hands, around our eyes, and neck. Of course keeping your body moisturized is important as well.

Tip#4

Keep Moving. As we age and mature keeping those bones and joints moving will help slow down the aches and pains. Now I used to be able to do those high impact exercises. But not any more. You can do low impact exercises and have fun. Opting for yoga, pilates, swimming, biking, and of course a walk will help keep your body in shape. Also as women over 40, a good morning stretch helps awaken your body for the day. 3 NON FOOD REASONS YOUR DIET ISN’T WORKING

Tip#5

Matte Over Shimmer. When we do our makeup as mature women staying away from shimmer will helps us not look to shiny or greasy. The way shimmer shows up on younger ladies doesn’t show up on our skin the same. We want to look polished and highlight our best assets.

Tip#6

Occupy Your Mind. Along with tip#1, as we mature, keeping our mind occupied will eliminate boredom, anxiety, and depression. Because we’re getting older, probably empty nesters, or kids are out with their friends, we end up with a lot of downtime. Having a hobby like gardening, knitting, sewing, or anything that requires you to be focused will help with those emotions that may come.

Tip#7

Relax. Take a day off to do nothing. Sleep in. Binge watch something on television. Be a bum for a day. Allow yourself permission to just be. Relieve the mind and body sometimes to let it recuperate. Take a day off to reenergize so you can keep going.

As we mature and grow certain things just aren’t as important anymore. We become more calm, reserved, and life’s intangibles become a priority. Don’t look at maturing in a negative manner. Instead embrace it, have fun, and be grateful you made it thus far.

RosalynLynn

Be you so you can be free.