BLOCK OUT THE DISTRACTIONS

Blocking out distractions is something we all have to adhere to at work, at school, or even home. For some, blocking out distractions is a little more difficult. When I was in the 4th grade, at one of my parent teacher conference, the teacher told my mom the only problem she had was every time the door open I’d look up to see who was there. Well, you can say I was curious, nosey, or bored. But if a door opens it’s almost a natural reaction to look up and see who’s there. Well not so much.

Fast forward to now. My youngest son, who’s in the 5th grade, have some kids that seek attention and may disrupt the class from time to time. Well when that happens and the teacher has to give certain students special attention, it throws my son off. He can’t concentrate. He’s upset that they are acting out and interrupting. In the result he has to finish his work at home or it may take a little longer than usual.

“Son you’re going to have to block out the noise.” Simply put. I explainied to him we can’t control other people, their actions, or when some distractions may occur. The only thing we can control is how we respond. We must not let other people actions cause us to lose sight on our task, goals, or job. MENTAL HEALTH REMINDERS: KEEPING MYSELF CENTERED

Is it tough? ABSOLUTELY!!!!!! But mastering the art of focusing on what you’re doing in the moment, completing the work, and staying consistent will allow you to block out the distractions. In every class, at every office, and every store there is going to be a distraction. If it isn’t preventing you physically, harming you, or affecting your mental capacity then it’s not your business to tend to. Every since then he has been able to block out distractions.

Blocking out distractions doesn’t just have to be at work or school. It can be at home. Blocking out negative mental and emotional noise is something we all work towards each day. Those are honestly the biggest distractions. The voices, thoughts, and emotions that we believe prohibit us from functioning on a daily. Block out the noise. Ignore the negative. Don’t feed into the distractions.

RosalynLynn

Be you so you can be free.

SELF CARE IS A LIFESTYLE

I was watching this video and they were discussing how self care is harmful for mental health. I think the misconception is that self care is this “thing” that you have to go find or get. Self care is a lifestyle of habits, tools, and activities you rely on in times of need. You won’t need every tool in the bag everyday. Self care for mental and emotional health is for everyone to cope with daily life.

Also these goals, systems, habits, and activities aren’t just for those suffering from mental illness. If you are a happy and healthy individual, self care is also for you. We all are going to get overwhelmed, drained, exhausted, and burned out. It’s great to have something to rely on and pull out the bag to shake you out of the funk. Sometimes we go on auto pilot and before we know it, life has passed us by and we missed out on some laughter and joy.

These self care activities also doesn’t have to be extreme or expensive. 8 FEEL GOOD SELF CARE ACTIVITIES You have a great tool already, your phone. You can find great motivation and encouragement on YouTube daily, all day. You can journal on your phone. There are many free ebooks and templates you can download. Podcast are great for those seeking motivation and inspiration. A simple self care habit of reading more, can be done on your phone. Download a good book and read instead of scrolling on social media. We can find great exercise videos, plans, and workouts on our phone.

Simply put, self care is for you to have something custom fit for your mental, emotional, and physical health to prevent the burn out or exhaustion. One small daily habit is all some need. One hour of drawing or coloring by numbers is a great stress relief moment for yourself. Rearranging a room in your home is self care. Cleaning your makeup brushes is self care. Self care is endless. Going to sleep early is a self care activity.

There are many great tips, tools, and tricks that many share that has worked for them. Take what you can to help you and leave the rest. Self care is a lifestyle not a one time thing.

RosalynLynn

Be you so you can be free.

DON’T PUT YOURSELF IN A BOX

Ironically in the last two days my daughter and I had the same scenario of letting fear keep us in a box. Yesterday I only spoke to my husband about my situation after I worked it out. Then when the same scenario arose with my daughter I was able to give her the same pep talk I gave myself.

After a meeting this week with my supervisor going over a coaching plan he said this is for you when you become a supervisor. Before I knew it I said, “I don’t want to be a supervisor.” He said it’s a very rewarding position and I can see you being a supervisor. I didn’t say anything and we moved on to the rest of the meeting. At the end when we were wrapping up he said again, this is for you down the road when you’re a supervisor. I froze and awkwardly smiled while gritting my teeth at the same time.

Now, I had been very vocal and outspoken on where I wanted to go and the type of position I wanted. But he’s the third person that has referenced me moving into a supervisor role or position. When I got off I had to think to myself. Am I holding myself back? Have I been putting myself in a box? Am I stunting my growth and potential on what I can become? Then I realized I had to stop saying what I don’t want and truly trust God’s plan for me. I said I want to be in support role. He said you’ll be very supportive in this position for your team.I finally said to myself, I’m going to stop saying what I don’t want and what I’m not going to do. CHANGE IS UNCOMFORTABLE

Fast forward to my daughters parent teacher conference and her writing teacher was explaining to us that they really wanted my daughter to enroll in an honors course, but she opted out. After many conversations and counselors telling her how good she is and the support she’d have, my daughter still opted out. The teacher and I discussed how we understood the fears a student may have in enrolling in an honor course and may not be ready for that leap.

While on the ride home, I had to let my daughter know what I had just said to myself. I explained that sometimes we allow our fear of failure or not succeeding as we have been hinder us and stunt our growth. We have to believe in the talent, gifts, and greatness that is in us. We have so much potential and can do great things but we put ourselves in a box. Step outside our comfort zone, expand our mind and open up to new opportunities, allow our horizon to expand, and be the great person that we are and everyone sees.

Just because it’s not something you visioned yourself doing or wanted doesn’t mean that isn’t for you. Each step on the journey is preparing us for the next.

RosalynLynn

Be you so you can be free.

20 LOVE AFFIRMATIONS

This week is all about love. Love for yourself, love for your family, love for your friends, and love for anything that brings you joy. It’s important to begin with love of self. Once we understand how we want to be loved, need to be loved, and know how to love we are able to have better relationships. No matter what your relationship status is or where you are in life you deserve love and are loved. Here are some love affirmations to see you through this week.

Love Affirmations

I am ready to receive love
It is ok and safe for me to accept love
My heart is open to receive love
I am ready to attract loving relationships
I am beautiful
I have something to offer in a relationship
I am love
I am surrounded by love
I feel love in myself
I love myself
I am loved in my relationships
I am a good partner
I enjoy meeting new people
I know what I want
I know how I want to feel and be loved
I am ready to share
I love being in a relationship
My relationships are healthy
I am comfortable being in love
Love is a healing force of energy

Those are 20 affirmations of love to begin the week. Love on yourself each day. 5 REMINDERS ABOUT SELF LOVE Then let that love expand to your family, friends, and coworkers. Love is an action that we must decide to do each day. Even when we feel our worst, we are loved and cared for.

RosalynLynn

Be you so you can be free.

5 PHRASES TO REMOVE FROM YOUR VOCABULARY

One day I sat back and realized certain comments or phrases I make can be damaging to my mental and emotional health. As I was reflecting one day on the impact of me making a commitment to not complain has truly been encouraging, it lead me to make a commitment to remove some language from my vocabulary . I only want to speak into existence positive goals, values, and affirmations. Also growth. Here are a few phrases I realized I say too often that I need to try to eliminate.

“Is it something wrong with me?” When I feel differently or have a different point of view and I felt it wasn’t received how I intended I would immediately question myself. I had to learn my thoughts, point of view, and ideas are valid, unique to me, and my point of view can help others sometimes.
“I’m sorry to bother you.” Whenever I need to ask for help or a question, especially if I feel like I should know it, I would say this. I never wanted to be a burden. But I know that I’m not being a bother, I’m seeking information and clarity on something. It’s ok to ask for help or ask questions when needed. It’s best to ask all the questions you need rather than guess and go down a path of wrong turns.
“What I’m not going to do is…” I’ve learned saying this limits my growth. This also puts in the universe that I’m not willing to even think about the possibilities of doing something new, growing or learning. Instead I’ve learned to say that’s something I’ve never done but I can try.
“I’m tired.” Along with not complaining, saying I’m tired had such a negative connotation. Yes we all do get drained and just want to collapse. But I do understand at that point my mind and body has done all it could do for that day. Because sometimes I would begin to notice that I wasn’t physically tired but more emotionally or mentally tired from the events of the day.
“I know I shouldn’t do this but…” That phrase already sets up for a guilt trip after said event takes place. I’ve learned to make decisions that are good for me. As long as I want to do it, I’m not going to make excuses for wanting to do it.

Those are a couple of phrases that I’ve realized have some negative impact on my thoughts. As we all know our thoughts become our actions and how we feel. Part of healing and growing is realizing what we can do for ourselves to make each day as peaceful and positive as we can. At the end of the day we aren’t perfect but we can try to be as good to ourselves as the day allows. 6 SIMPLE HABITS TO BE GOOD TO YOU

RosalynLynn

Be you so you can be free.

15 THINGS TO STOP FEELING GUILTY FOR

One of the biggest parts of healing and growing is realizing you have the right to make choices and to not feel guilty about them. Often times, we beat ourselves up for doing things or creating boundaries to protect us because it may not be the most comfortable decision. However, we shall not feel guilty for protecting our peace, mental, and emotional wellbeing. Through my process here are 15 things I had to stop feeling guilty for and give myself some grace.

Stop Feeling Guilty For…

Eating some ice cream or your favorite dessert.
Not cleaning or doing laundry.
Taking PTO.
Sleeping IN.
Not returning a text or call.
Making a mistake.
Needing help.
Not knowing an answer to something.
Feeling sad or not in a good mood.
Saying no.
Skipping a workout.
Cutting someone off.
Declining an invitation.
Wanting to purchase you something just because.
Needing some comfort or love.

Those are a few things that I had to stop feeling guilty for. I have to remind myself all the time, life is a journey. There will be twist and turns as I travel. With each step I will learn, grow, and become a better person. GROWTH CAN LOOK LIKE… Even on the the bumpy parts of the road. That’s when you learn the most about yourself. It is so freeing to be able to make yourself feel good without worrying if someone is going to feel uncomfortable.

RosalynLynn

Be you so you can be free.

5 LITTLE THINGS THAT MAKE ME HAPPY

As I grow and enjoy my journey I’m learning to celebrate the small things in life and appreciate the moments that some may look over. Lately, there are some things that I realize bring me more joy than a piece of cheesecake, my favorite dessert. It’s more important to take a look back each night, week, month or year and appreciate the finer things that brings you joy. Here are just a few things that make me feel whole, comfort, and at peace each day.

Watching TV with my daughter nightly. It has become a ritual these last couple months for us to watch something of her choosing. Or sometimes she’ll get into a program I recorded and want to watch. But this is our way of chatting without it seeming like it’s a task or me trying to get information. We learn from each, get to know each other, and discuss things that probably won’t come up on a regular.
Dropping my kids off at school. I think I look forward to this because it’s my way of sending them off. I get to motivate and pour into them while in the car. I know this won’t last long as they get older and graduate. It’s sort of our quiet time to enjoy each other before starting our busy day and reconvening later in the day.
Monthly salon appointment. I look forward to this appointment because I get to talk to a bunch of women, divulge in beauty talk and products, and leave feeling like a brand new woman. It’s something I do for me that makes me feel good on the inside more than the outside. 9 DAILY FEMININE SELF CARE HABITS TO MAKE YOU FEEL GOOD
New Inspirational Journals. These gems I purchased from the dollar store has really allowed me to purge my thoughts, feelings, and desires without filter. I get to be my true honest self and not worry about being perfect or writing perfectly. After writing I feel lighter and ready to tackle the day. Journaling has allowed me to clear my thoughts for new inspiration.
Daily pampering. Each morning I have to take care of feminine self. Starting with my skincare routine, perfume, and jewelry. Just dolling myself up a bit keeps my spirits up. When you don’t get dressed or doll yourself up sometimes it’s easy to get into a slump. You don’t need a special event to get dressed up or glam yourself.

Those are 5 little things that brings me joy. Focusing on what makes me feel good inside and out keeps my mind open for new positive thoughts. If you’re feeling a little blue, I encourage you to look back at your day and make a list of things that make you feel good. The smallest acts have the greatest impact.

RosalynLynn

Be you so you can be free.

6 SIMPLE HABITS TO BE GOOD TO YOU

We see it all the time, “be good to yourself”, “be kind to yourself”. The interpretation is that it takes a lot of money, fancy material things, or a perfect life. When in actuality it’s the simple daily habits you do for you that is the most beneficial. Trust me, I was one of those that didn’t think the small things mattered. But as I do them everyday and multiple times a day, it is the best free form of therapy. 7 JOURNAL PROMPTS FOR A GOOD WEEK

Simple Habits To Be Good To You

Rest. Simple enough right. Living off 2 hours of sleep doesn’t do anyone good. I remember years ago when everyone was talking grinding and getting no sleep. That is nonsense. Your body and mind needs rest to recharge. Give yourself a cut off time for work. Make a day where you do nothing but binge something on the tube. Rest yourself. Everyone will benefit from it.
Take a day off. No longer do I feel guilty for taking a day or even a half a day. Sometimes you just need to unplug and log off. Have a moment without the kids home, or your spouse. Sit in silence and in peace. Use your PTO. Sometimes you just need a break from work. I know the weekend or the 2 days off you may get isn’t enough for me sometimes.
Eat yourself some colors. If you need some inspiration, Pinterest will give you all the recipes you need to expand your pallet and not get bored with the same dishes over and over again. If you can’t eliminate certain foods completely, just cut back. Simply cutting back on sugar, salt, and processed foods will make a huge difference in how your body feels.
Read, journal, pray, meditate. Whatever you need to center yourself, DO IT. There is so much power in focusing our minds on the positive filling up that mental health bank. Daily practices of mental and emotional self care will have your mental health bank so full that when you do need to withdraw from it, there won’t be a dent in it. Find something that works for you.
Don’t compare yourself. Your journey is your journey. Just because someone else’s journey may appear smoother and better doesn’t mean the aren’t walking a bumpy road. Live your journey and only yours. What’s meant for you will find it’s way to you when it’s the right time. Sometimes we can be given gifts at the wrong time in life, and we’ll lose it because we weren’t ready for it and didn’t know how to handle it.
Move your body. Along with eating colorful, moving your body will help eliminate many health problems. I know as I’ve grown I have to get up and stretch because my body just gets stiff. It doesn’t have to be anything extreme. But just work muscles and move your body to get the blood flowing better.

Those are some daily good for you habits that can be done anytime. Being good to you, doesn’t require much. You deserve to feel good inside and out. Sometimes no matter what someone does for us, we just have to make our own self feel good. Be good to you. You deserve it.

RosalynLynn

Be you so you can be free.

6 THINGS THAT DRAINS YOUR ENERGY AND TIME

On a daily we worry about things that are out of our control. We also give time, conversation, and resources to people and things that don’t deserve our energy. Hence, we end up disappointed, sad, angry, and frustrated because we didn’t get a return on our investment. Part of self care is realizing and prioritizing certain things that are worth our time and energy. Once we accept and acknowledge our worth, we’ll be able to manage and dedicate ourselves to people and things that serves us good.

6 Common Things That Waste Our Time

People pleasing. For some people, no matter what you do or give it just won’t be enough. It will seem as if the goal post just keeping moving. For those that are always requiring more of you, they are lacking in something you can’t fulfill. That is for them to figure out and make peace with. You do what you can within your power and limits. Also do what you want. Just because you have the time and resources doesn’t mean you have to exhaust them out.
Proving yourself to others. You are good enough just the way you are. What you have, what you make, where you live, your job, or anything else. You are the only one like you that exist in this world. No matter how hard someone tries, they can’t be like you and furthermore, you can’t make yourself into something else. With where you are and what you have to offer, if it’s not good enough then they don’t deserve the air you breathe.
Holding on to anger. I was very good at holding on to a grudge and anger. Guess what? That did nothing for my mental and emotional wellbeing. The only thing I kept repeating was, “but you don’t understand what they did to me.” Letting anger go doesn’t mean the action didn’t occur. It simply says I’m not going to let that person or event continuously hurt me. Nor control or dictate how I proceed in life specifically in relationships. Letting that anger go is for you more than the other person. MOTIVATIONAL HEALING: LEARN YOUR SOURCE OF ANGER
Trying to be perfect. Perfect is boring. There is no way on earth anyone can be perfect. Trying to chase perfectionism robs you of your joy and enjoying the gifts you have now. Instead of living in the moment and appreciating where you are, it’s being overlooked. Also when chasing perfection we’re tying to present a version of ourselves that don’t exist. Be you. You are perfectly imperfect.
Self doubt, negative self talk, and overly critical. This does nothing for our emotional wellness. Sometimes we think being hard on ourselves is being humble or self motivating. Some of us are conditioned to not even pat ourselves on the back or celebrate our wins. It is very important to celebrate ourselves even the small wins on a daily. Believe it or not, we can put ourself down worst than anyone else. Talk good to you. Build yourself up.
Not forgiving. Yes, this is tough. But forgiveness is truly for you. You need to sleep at night. Move on with your life. Learn from the events and situation, so you can possibly see the signs and prevent it from happening again. Not forgiving, says so much about us more than the person that caused the trauma. They have to pay for what they did to you and you can’t say when or how it will happen.

Those are 6 things that I had to learn to let go in order to get to the daily life I envision for myself. With active daily practice and exercises, there will be a point you can live for you and not worry about what others think. However, when you get to that point, don’t stop. Keep doing the affirmations, journaling, prayer, meditation, and therapy that got you there. Be well!!!!!

RosalynLynn

Be you so you be free.

MENTAL HEALTH REMINDERS: KEEPING MYSELF CENTERED

Over the last six months I’ve made a huge transition in my professional career and it has been a challenge finding balance with the schedule. I envisioned this position for a couple of years and now it’s almost as if I’m not really living in that vision sometimes. Trying to keep balance of being a mom, wife, the blog, and other ventures I had to really think, pause and center myself. Think about this new chapter, where I am going, and what I want to do.

But first there are some mental health reminders I had to activate and actively practice to get me to my understanding, self awareness, and peace with myself. As we grow and transition in life our mental and emotional health also transitions. It is up to us to be aware and recognize there are some mental health habits that needs more practice, some needs to be substituted, and others we may have to adopt all together.

There is power in honesty. The immense amount of power that you receive when you are honest with yourself can be overwhelming. I’ve come to know the more honest I am with how I am feeling mentally, physically, and emotionally helps me with the next step in recognizing the why. When you own your truth no one can abuse you or use your truth against you. I began to peel back the layers in why certain things were making me feel uncomfortable or why I may not have 100% locked in. Also being honest about what you want to do in life and not feel bad. My biggest hurdle was speaking aloud, even though I had this amazing position with great benefits, flexibility, and support, my heart was still yearning for the dream God placed in me. I’ve heard it a million times, once God places a vision or dream in you, no matter what you do or have, that dream or vision isn’t going to leave you. So now I am at a place to figure how to deliver on what was placed in me.
My happiness has to come from me. No one person, no amount of money, material things, or event can give me happiness. I have to be happy with who I am at this current moment, in this body, in this skin, in this home, with all the blessings I’ve been given. My happiness has to come from me knowing it is ok to dream big, have dreams no one understands, and that they can happen if I do the work. There is no such thing as I’ll be happy when….Everything that you have right now is what you’ve asked for. Now, is it ok to always want to grow, be better, do better and have better, absolutely. I know I have the right to do what makes me happy and I don’t need permission from anyone to do so. I was speaking to a client earlier in the week and she was a mature woman in her 60s. She was retired but substitute teacher part time and show homes for Redfin part time. In the middle of the conversation she says I can work when I want. I’m a little vain, I like to get Botox. She is happy living her life and doing what makes her happy. You have to be fearless when it comes to your happiness.
There is power in writing. Writing down your dreams. Vision for your life. Your fears. Your wants. Your desires. Whatever comes to mind, there is power in writing. I am an advocate for journaling. However, I now know the power in writing everyday. Sometimes I write 2x a day. An hour before work I sit down and write. No plan. Just pen to paper. The thoughts you can purge is gratifying. The prayers and conversation you can have speaking with God and writing your dreams down is powerful. I’ve heard many say writing is therapeutic, they are right. In the beginning I had no idea how to write, what to say, or where to begin. I purchased these amazing Inspirational Journals from the dollar store of all places and I haven’t been able to put the pen down. They are themed scripture based prompts for you to write. I read the verse at the top of the page and write down my interpretation in the spiritual sense, mental and emotional wellbeing, and in my lifestyle. For only $1, each day I can journal my way to peace and happiness. The themes are Truth, Joy, Courage, and Wisdom.

Those are three mental health reminders that I’ve over worked these last several months. My self awareness has afforded me great understanding and healing. Writing has been the best to get my honest thoughts out without judgement or embarrassment. Fearing no one will understand. And my understanding of knowing each day I am on a journey there is no destination to happiness. HAPPINESS ISN’T A DESTINATION It’s always evolving. Be well!!!!!

RosalynLynn

Be you so you can be free.