MENTAL NOTE OF THE DAY

“Remember, you have been criticizing yourself for years and it hasn’t worked. Try approving of yourself and see what happens.” -Louise L. Hay

The one thing I know is, what we tell ourselves hurts us more than anything someone else says or does. You wanna know why? We believe everything we tell ourselves. Furthermore, we are very good at talking ourselves out of something. We can think of a scenario and situation in our heads and it never happened. Have you ever played out a conversation or arguement in your head? We’ve all done that at one point, “the next time I see XYZ and they say this, I’m going to say this.” Oh!!!! How many times have you started your day complaining about everything you had to do at work, how you didn’t want to talk to certain people, or how that coworker gets on your last nerves. Then you get to work, and the sheer sight of your coworker turns your smile upside down. Why? Because we’ve already talked ourselves into not wanting to have a good day or interaction. No matter what the situation or circumstance is, what we tell ourselves has a direct impact on how our day and life goes. Sadly, we are very good at talking ourselves into a negative mindset. Don’t you think we can be even better at talking ourselves into a positive mindset. The last two weeks, before I even turn on my computer I write for 1-2 minutes on a notebook of nothing but positive thoughts, affirmations, and prayers. It’s not uniformed or grammatically correct. My intentions are to ensure I’m in the right mindset, positive self talk, and motivation. If you are experiencing too many negative thoughts try turning those into some positives. 10 MENTAL HEALTH REMINDERS

Example of My Morning Notes:

I am fearless
I am brave
I am strong
I am a good mom, wife, daughter, sister, friend, and worker
I am good at my job
God give me the strength to replace any negative thoughts with positive
God thank you for keeping me so many times, thank you for saving me, thank you for my family and our health
I am in control of my emotions
I give myself grace

That’s what came to mind yesterday morning. Sometimes it’s less and other times it’s more. But every day, moment, and direction of our life depends on how we view it, handle it, and overcome. Most importantly it’s what we say to ourselves quietly that hurts the most. So those things you are saying that no one hears, turn those into positives and tell yourself good things. Have a great day!!!!!!!

RosalynLynn

Be you so you can be free.

YOUR PASSION AND PURPOSE IS ALREADY IN YOU

How do I know what my passion and purpose in life is? I have no idea where to begin or find it. The good news is, you don’t have to find it, its already in you. You’ve probably had a glimpse of it more than once. But due to fear, lack of resources, finances, and fear of “looking crazy” to family and friends you probably ignored it for many years just like I did. I too would always ask “What is my purpose?” “What am I passionate about?”

The truth is that, I already knew. But because no one else had my vision, or it seemed far out, I didn’t act upon it, or pursued it. Finally, one day I watched Steve Harvey Motivational Video about finding your gift and knowing what it is. He said “your gift is the thing you do the absolute best, with the least amount of effort.”

So I’m telling you, your gift is the one thing you do without thinking, breathing, or blinking. You do it so well that you don’t even realize you’re doing it. When you are in your gift, you are at peace, smiling, eager to continue, you don’t want it to end, and when it does all you can think about is doing it again. JOURNAL WRITING: 10 QUESTIONS TO HELP YOU FIND YOURSELF Acknowledging or figuring out your gift will help you understand your passion and purpose.

Yesterday I had to admit some hard truths after speaking with a client. She simply called in for some insurance. Upon having a conversation and trying to get information she revealed she wasn’t in the best place mentally due to the death of her father. Without warning I sprung into action, speaking life into her. I totally left the quote in place until we were finish.

For an hour and half, without thinking or remembering I was at work, I poured into her until I can hear a sigh of relief in her voice. Immediately, I encouraged her to not apologize for being emotional. I let her know it was ok to grieve and to do so on her own terms. As I began to pour into her, she began to open up and tell me how she had been trying to deal with the realization of her loved one passing. At one point, she even said “I can’t believe I’m opening up to you like this but I needed this conversation.”

SideNote: Sometimes talking to strangers about your honest and raw emotions is easier than talking to family and friends. You can be as authentic as you need to be to express yourself and feelings. When we sometimes talk to family and friends we tend to hold back because we don’t want the judgement.

That’s when I knew. The more we continued to bond and talk, the more I wanted to encourage, motivate, and support. The more she felt better. Her voice no longer trembled. Her tears began to clear. And she said she feels like she can find a way to live with her father no longer being here in the physical.

After hanging up, I was ready to do it again. Before I knew, I said, “That is what I want to do.” I literally began thinking of ways I can talk to people and encourage them in whatever they were going through. I was jotting down notes and things. The rest of the day my mind was brainstorming and thinking of ways I could do it again and again. Even now I’m still thinking about it.

Yes I have a great cooperate job with an amazing company, benefits, flexibility, and support. But still with that, my heart is wanting to help heal, encourage, and motivate. That’s how I know what my purpose and passion is.

Think of that one time or more than one, when you were completely sound mind, body, and spirit. And you couldn’t wait to do it again. That’s your gift, purpose, and passion.

RosalynLynn

Be you so you can be free.

23 NEW YEAR JOURNAL WRITING PROMPTS

The new year always bring some seasonal anxiety and depression. The pressure to have this grand resolution or fresh start can be overwhelming. First you don’t have to have those grand resolutions. MENTAL NOTE OF THE DAY: NEW YEAR EDITION However, it is normal to feel like you want to have an outline of intentions, thoughts, views, or feelings about the upcoming year. Growth is good. Change is good. And we should want to be better, think better, do better, have better, and live better. To relieve some of that pressure, do some journal writing to get your mind flowing with ideas.

New Year Writing Prompts

What do I need more of that I didn’t get last year or not enough of?
Write 23 affirmations about you, your relationships, career, health, and financial self.
What would I like to accomplish this year. (Vacation, family, Savings, Love, Healing, Growth)
What can I do to get out of my comfort zone?
What is my end of the year vision or where do I want to be at the end of this year?
What are some healthy habits I’d like to pick up?
What are some habits I’d like to drop that isn’t good for me?
When was the last time I went to the doctor, dentist, or had a checkup?
Is this my year to make an appointment with a therapist?
What can I do to ensure I’m financially stable this year?
Are there any loved one I miss or would like to talk to?
Are there any relationships I need space between?
What are some self care habits I can do to build my mental and emotional health?
How am I feeling right now?
My greatest accomplishment last year was?
The one thing I would like to learn from that happened last year is?
I would like to start, stop, and continue….
What are 3 things I need to prioritize?
What areas do I need to give myself some grace in?
What are things I need to let go of that are holding me back?
What are my intentions for myself?
How do I want to be loved or supported this year?
What can I do to be more loving and supportive this year?

Those are 23 journal writing prompts to help ease some of your anxiety. Be as detailed as possible. Take your time. As you write you’ll learn more about yourself, your desires, and goals. The more we write the more we expand and open our minds to endless possibilities. Happy Writing!!!!!!!

RosalynLynn

Be you so you can be free.

MENTAL NOTE OF THE DAY: NEW YEAR EDITION

“Just a reminder that you don’t have to make resolutions. Or huge decisions. Or big proclamations. You can just set some sweet intentions and take each day as it comes.” Victoria Erickson

Please don’t feel the pressure to make some grand resolutions or major life changes. Typically any kind of lifestyle change or habit has to be developed. You don’t just wake up one day and say I’m going to start this and sustain that resolution long term. Hence, why most new year resolutions don’t make it past the end of January. To begin anything, you have to make a commitment mentally first. Instead create small goals, tasks, and intentions that you can stick to for a while and then add as you go. 10 NEW YEAR SELF CARE HABITS FOR A FRESH START The small daily self care habits and intentions are what builds up to a major lifestyle change. The last couple weeks of December I made a commitment to speak at least 3-5 affirmations aloud to myself in the mirror every morning. Sometimes I will do it in the middle of the day and before I go to bed. This gives me the mental mindset to remain positive, calm, and take action throughout the day to reach my goals. Setting small intentions for the day or week is easier attainable than long term goals. Instead of saying I’m going to lose 20lbs this month, commit to “I will work out 20 minutes 3x a week.” You’ll find that is easier to follow through with. Sometimes we can bite off more than we can chew. Which leads to discouragement, then eventually not doing anything at all. Think about one thing you want to accomplish this year and focus on that. My word this year is self awareness. I had many moments of self reflection and light bulb moments toward the end of the year that enlightened me on how I show up. I want to continue that to ensure my relationships, career, and life is fulfilled with the intentions I set out to achieve and possess. Enjoy each day, each moment, have no regrets, and be the best you, you can be each day. Happy New Year!!!!!!!!

RosalynLynn

Be you so you can be free.

I HAD TO TAKE MY OWN ADVICE

I had to take my own advice and pause for a moment. These last couple of months has been a season of change. In order to be in the moment, understand my assignement and what I was supposed to get out of it, I had to give myself permission to focus. Not just focus, but prioritize and make sure my feet were planted.

As I’ve stated in some previous posts, late August I accepted a position that I’d been wanting and working hard for. With that came the transiton of working remotely full time, a 12 week fast track training, and longer hours. Not to mention this began at the very start of the school year.

Trying to juggle the new postion, transition my home and create an office space, and manage school activities I felt like a hamster on a wheel. Along with that, I was still freelancing and selling on Poshmark. Yes, I know, doing wayyyyyy too much.

Although I asked for each gift, position, and blessing I knew I couldn’t put a 100% into all of them. Plus keep my sanity, be a mom, wife, and maintain my home. So I took my own advice and paused for a moment. I needed to reset my mind and expectations. First on the whole idea of working from home full time. My lifestyle was going to change vastly.

I decided to spend Saturday morning 2-3 hours posting and creating new Poshmark listings. That way throughout the week I can manage and maintain my closet. I use my lunch and breaks to drop my sales off at the post office. Next, I accept freelance contracts that doesn’t take too much of my time. Which ironically I’ve enjoyed and been able to deliver great pieces of work.

But I will say that has been the one ironic thing about this entire situation. My self awareness, self care, and mental health has been great and heightened. I knew it was going to be a change and I had to work at it everyday while on this new path and journey.

Working from home allows me to get laundry done throughout the day and even get dinner done by the time the kids get home from school. Therefore, it frees my time up to be with the family when I get off. I still wake up early in the morning before everyone else and tidy if I hadn’t done so the night before. I’m able to have a moment to myself, get dressed, and mentally prepare for the day.

I’ve added 10 minutes of meditation before starting work. Increased my reading time during breaks and before I go to bed. Maintaining my cut off time of 9p.m. No matter what hasn’t been done or said checking out mentally and emotionally has helped me keep my joy and peace. I’ve noticed I have a great nights sleep when I sleep with the oil diffuser going.

Because I am remote, and we have to be on camera quite a bit, my skin care has also heightened. I take my time on my night time skin care routine to ensure I awake with bright, smooth, moisturized, and glowing skin. In the morning I keep my skincare routine to a minimum while focusing on my eyes and moisture. Working remotely also has me playing around with minimal makeup looks to make sure I am still professional and work ready. Lastly, I still get dressed as if I am going into the office. Outside of my comfy fuzzy socks.

Now my schedule is about to change again this week. I’ve learned to get comfortable with change and I really do enjoy my job and all the blessings I’ve been privileged to have. I am very thankful for the self awareness most of all. The ability to be honest with myself and say you need to prioritize, reset expectations I NEED TO RESET MY EXPECTATIONS, and not over extend yourself has been the best self care I can ever do or have for myself.

It’s the end of the year and holiday season. Before you have a blow up, a breakdown, or get sick, take a break or step away. Ask yourself what is more important to you in this season or journey. What shall you let go of. What is worth putting time and effort into. Have I neglected my mental, physical, and emotional health. Be well.

RosalynLynn

Be you so you can be free.

“How does the believe I must be loved by everyone to be happy lead to unreasonable expectations and feelings of depression?”-Unknown

The short answer is, your happiness will forever be based off what others think you’re worth, what you have to offer, and how they think you should be living your life.

Having the beliefs that you must be loved by everyone to be happy stems from a lack of self confidence, self esteem, and self worth. That means you are basing the value of your life on what others approve. In order to belief that everyone has to love you, you are seeking their approval and validation.

What happens when you consistently seek others approval and validation? You are living a life that other people think you should live. You aren’t making decisions for yourself. When it’s time to make a decision, you aren’t confident. Or, you don’t want the decision you make to offend other people or hurt their feelings. Although, it is the best choice for you.

Along with seeking validation, you’re going to forever be on a hamster wheel running for your life. Depending on who is around, that is how you’re going to answer, be, or exist. In short, you shift whichever way the wind blows. One day you’re going left, and the next you’re going right.

You aren’t thinking for yourself. Believing that everyone has to love you requires you to live for others happiness. If you are living to please others and make sure they are happy, your happiness gets put to the side. What you want in life and what makes you happy is different from others. No two people will want the same in life or go down the same path. It’s impossible to please everyone. KEY TO HAPPINESS: DO WHATEVER YOU WANT TO DO You aren’t responsible for anyone else’s happiness but yours.

woman holding a paper with the word confident

If someone gets upset because you made a decision that benefits you, then they aren’t worthy of having a space in your life. You’re being emotionally manipulated. The demands, requests, and asks become increasingly inconvenient, unreasonable, and disrespectful. They will require more time than you have to give. Along with other resources such as money, belongings, favors, and your space.

People pleasing leads to depression because you will become mentally and emotionally fatigued. Eventually you won’t be able to keep up with the demands of everyone. You’ll feel like you’re on a never ending cycle. No matter what you do or how much you give, it won’t be enough. You will deplete yourself physically, mentally, emotionally, financially, and spiritually. In the long run, you may begin to question what is right, what is normal.

As your physical health declines due to lack of nutrition, sleep, fatigue, and second guessing your mental health will suffer. Your ability to think things through is no longer there. You may become short fused, you’ve probably missed time with loved ones who really care about you. Most of the time relationships has suffered because they’ve warned you about said people.

Lastly, when you have given your soul and you have nothing left to give, those people that you thought loved you are long gone. When you are in need, you have absolutely no one to call on. That leads to a dark path of depression and anxiety. Now you are in rebuild mode, yourself and relationships you’ve lost. HAPPINESS ISN’T A DESTINATION

Love yourself first. Love you enough to know that no one that really cares about you or your wellbeing will put unreasonable demands on you. It is perfectly ok to say no. Boundaries are a necessity in every relationship. Your boundaries are promises to yourself. Trust yourself enough to get you through. Be your own best friend first and build a great relationship with yourself. That way you know what you want and expect out of others.

Be well on your journey. Good Luck!!!!!!

RosalynLynn

Be you so you can be free.

BE YOUR BEST WHERE YOU ARE

This new position has tested me. I went from being licensed in one state to being licensed in 50 states. Is this an opportunity of a lifetime, absolutely, but that comes with a great deal of unknown. I’ve had to sit and be still while the administrative portion plays out. I was being tested and didn’t even know it.

I had a moment where my license weren’t ready in most states. Therefore, I couldn’t perform and do my job. What was I to do? Doubt, discouragement, and a lot of questioning took place. However, I had an light bulb moment. I was tasked to monitor and take notes of another agent. In that moment I realized, Roz you’re being tested.

At first I felt like I had nothing to offer, nothing to do, and it was a waste of my time. But then I turned that into this is going to give me a leg up. I get to watch and hear someone else go through their growing pains. Make notes for myself on what I would do and not do in certain situations.

Next I was able to do what I love to do outside of my corporate job, and that’s motivate. With each call and client I was able to give her positive feedback, encouragement, and pep talk to get her through it. After the second day, I realized what I wanted to do next in this position. I thoroughly enjoyed spending time bonding and cheering on someone.

By the third day, I had a meeting with my coach to give my six months plans. Within a year or so their goal is to have you promoted. Not having my license in and having to monitor another agent, I was able to figure out my next move within this company. QUICK MONDAY MORNING MOTIVATIONAL TIP

Even when you feel like you have nothing to give, the steps God have you taking you don’t see the point, stay the course. Pass the test. Do your best while you are still. It’s going to set you up for your next step in life. No matter where you are, be the best right there. Each step is necessary for you to progress, learn, and grow. Skipping steps or not giving your all will make the journey just that much more difficult.

You can do nothing and be productive. Offering support is being productive. Waiting patiently and excitedly is being productive. Don’t give up because the process isn’t playing out how you think it should. Or if you have a bump in road. Stay the course.

RosalynLynn

Be you so you can be free.

WEEKLY BLOG: TYPICAL WORK WEEK, HOMECOMING PARADE AND GAME

This week is all about balancing work, home, and all the kids activities. Not too much going on until the end of the week. Either way my goal is to be as productive as much as I practice self care and rest.

Sunday: Slept in of course. Have to have a day to get a little extra sleep. After brunch I kinda let the day guide me. I didn’t have too much housework to catch up on since I did that all yesterday. Also I wanted this to be a chill day because we went to a football game yesterday afternoon, and after sitting in the sun we’re all drained. Later in the afternoon I decided my plants needed some maintenance. You know, cutting dead leaves, watering, and turning. Finally I capped the evening off with watching football and going for a walk. I achieved my goal in turning in early.

Monday: Off to a great start of the week with drop off. This week is a slow one until the end. I’m getting quite adjusted to this work from home full time. I actually enjoy my day and have plenty of interaction with coworkers. It’s moving and coming along better than expected. I also have been doing a pretty good job at balancing work and home life. After drop off and before heading to work, I had to package up some Poshmark packages. This was a typical Monday for us. School, work, meetings, and an uneventful night cap. Just the way I like it sometimes. Can’t have everyday of the week booked to capacity.

Tuesday: So today started off a little different. The morning drop off went great. However, I had a little moment at work. Nothing happened in particular, but I had a moment of doubt that I can’t do this. After about 15 minutes of second guessing myself and literally thinking of a way to go backwards, I had to give myself a pep talk. I stepped away from my computer went to the window prayed, talk to myself, and got back to work. I posted some affirmations on my computer as daily reminders. I’ve been good and ready to go since. After that, I had to schedule some midterm conferences for my daughter. Her school likes to an 8 week conference update with parents just to check in. Which I think is a good idea. Later in the evening I had to head out for a walk and clear my head.

Wednesday: It’s an early release day. The kids get out of school 2hours early. Now there is a shift in the schedule. But as always, we’ll adapt. The kids doesn’t have anything planned, they actually said they want to come home and relax. Before picking up, I spent my lunch preparing an early dinner for them since I had to go back to work. My goal is to clean and tidy up when I get off since tomorrow and Friday evening we have plans.

Thursday: This was a gloomy day. My husband has been having some back pains. The allergy flare ups have been hitting everyone in the house and we’re happy it’s Friday eve. Had a pretty good day at work today. Everything is clicking, I’m getting into a groove, and having a great time interacting via Teams. My plan is to have dinner ready by the time the kids get home and tidy while I’m on lunch. Due to us having to leave quite early for the homecoming parade downtown. One of the local high schools here is kicking off homecoming season. After the parade, there is a pep rally at the capitol stairs.

Friday: Friyayyyy!!!!! T.G.I.F. TGIF: SELF CARE IS ALL AROUND YOU I’m ready for today and get done with work to start the weekend. The kids are in rare form because of tonight’s homecoming game. During my break and lunch hour, I decided to cook and clean to ensure the house was ready before we left. Also I just like to make sure when we come back, all we have to do is run to the shower. Great start to the day. Everyone had a great day at work and school. Thankfully it isn’t too humid tonight for the game. Off to the game we go!!!!!!

Saturday: We all slept in except for my husband. He had to go open the store and my son is heading to work this afternoon. The game was amazing, everyone had a great time, and we’re ready for next weeks game with the rival high school. After brunch I did a good clean and put up some more fall decor that I found at Hobby Lobby. After cleaning all day, I did a good deep condition on my hair, worked out, and waited for the fellas to get off work. It was a perfect chill Saturday afternoon.

Have a great week!!!!!!

P.S. Weekly blog is designed to show the realistic day in the life of a working mom balancing family, work, life, and herself.

RosalynLynn

Be you so you can be free.

MENTAL NOTE OF THE DAY

”Only in the darkness can you see stars.”- Martin Luther King Jr.

spiral notebook with message on white paper sheet

The toughest moments in life provides the greatest lessons of life. The stronger the storm, the brighter, tougher, wiser, richer, smarter, and braver you become. Why? You’ve been tested, and you survived. Therefore, your ability to stand off anything becomes more manageable the more wisdom you gain. Learn in the darkest of times. Grow in those times. Heal through the pain. Most of the time when we’re at our lowest point we’re stuck. We can’t seem to make any decisions or move forward. The situation or circumstances has to play out. Therefore, while you’re idle, you have all the time you need to reflect, make plans, and heal. Once you’re in a storm once you won’t be in that same storm again. Yes, another one will occur, but it won’t be exactly like the last. Embrace the darkness. Just like when we sleep at night our bodies and mind are recharging. There is good that can come out of darkness. Enjoy the rest of your day!!!!!

RosalynLynn

Be you so you can be free.

MENTAL HEALTH REMINDER: YOU CAN LOVE YOURSELF RIGHT NOW

You can begin to love yourself right now, as you are, as God created you. There isn’t anything you’re lacking to stop you from loving, appreciating, and being the best version of you. Whatever you are feeling or going through it’s only temporary. That doesn’t define you, your life, and where you’re headed.

You can love the body in you’re in right now. Even if you aren’t as confident as you would like to be. Appreciate where you are right now and love the curves, cellulite, wrinkles, dark spots, and imperfections. So when you do reach your ideal weight, get a good nights rest, and reach the point you are confident, then you can appreciate how far you’ve come. Embrace and enjoy the journey.

Whatever amount of dollars you have right now, you can love yourself. You don’t need more to feel better, look better, or love on yourself. Love the small home you’re in now. That apartment, room, or wherever you live. The vehicle you have love it. Appreciate it. Loving on yourself and for yourself starts with gratitude. 10 DAILY SIMPLE SELF CARE ACTIVITIES THAT WORK

The way you were created is perfect. Therefore, you don’t need to lose weight, get a bigger bottom, smaller waist, million followers, luxury vacation, long hair, short hair, spouse, children, jewelry, and everything else superficial to love who you are right now. You are equipped with everything you need to fall in love with yourself as is. You are perfect just the way you are.

Make a choice and decision to put your best foot forward so you can present the current you confidently as is. When we live in the “when I get this…” we’re not enjoying the now. In actuality, where we are and what we have now, is actually what we hoped and prayed for long ago. Accept the now to appreciate the future. If we don’t accept, acknowledge, and appreciate the small gifts then we’ll never be able to appreciate the large gifts that’s waiting on us.

Starting today and this weekend love all of you as you are. Keep pouring love into you. The more you pour into you the more it pours to others. Have a great weekend.

RosalynLynn

Be you so you can be free.