As I’ve progressed in my self awareness journey I’ve mastered the skill of being present in the moment and able to receive the messages as they come. If I ever have to question what faith, hope, and belief look like I witnessed it first hand. And more importantly there was action behind the belief.
As I sit and listen to her answer the question “So how is your mom doing?”, her voice doesn’t quiver. She doesn’t hesitate to say “it’s not the absolute worst nor is it better.” She confessed her mother had several mini strokes which led to her dementia. Then she delivered what faith, hope, and belief looks like: She said, “My hope is that mom has a final stroke and she goes in her sleep.”
Now on the surface you would clutch your pearls. But when you believe and have faith, you know living with a loved one who has no quality of life, has pain around the clock, loss of appetite, loss of movement in limbs, lack of awareness of themselves and loved ones, that isn’t the life you’d hope for for them. Yes, we want them around but at some point it becomes selfish. In result, whenever they do transition, we are left with the pain of what their last days reflected. MENTAL NOTE OF THE DAY
As she describes the emotional and physical toll it takes to care for her aging mother that has dementia, she’s still very self aware of her own needs. She told her mom, I have to go out and see people. She refuses to give up her life. Her hobbies, craft and book club weekly meetings. As well as church.
As she was speaking I could’t help but reflect on the countless family members and friends that gave up their life taking care of their loved one. After my grandma transitioned, all the arrangements and services were done, my mom sat at the table and said, “I don’t know what to do everyday.” Why? Because for months she gave up her entire being to take care of grandma.
Even in the midst of grief, her ability to have self awareness, emotionalwellness, and boundaries inspired me to continue. We’re going to experience some raw emotions and experiences, but all the while it’s still priority to put ourselves first. No matter what the situation is, we are left with ourselves to move on.
Have faith, hope, and belief. Believe you have the power and strength to do all things and over come all things. Just because you’re having a hiccup doesn’t mean to lack self care. If anything, ramp it up.
This is something that I’ve been thinking about for awhile now. Can you have both: family and career. Some says yes and others says no. Both are full time jobs. Due to my husband position I was the one who had to be extremely flexible and sacrifice. With that being said, I knew I wanted to be present mentally and emotionally for my kids. I only have them for a short amount of time before they expand their wings and go on their own. Conversations with those of my generation, one of the common themes was lack of emotionalsupport. Having a parent interested them, their thoughts, feelings, interest, views, likes, and dislikes.
I’ve watched some friends and family members raise their children completely different and saw outcomes that support both.
First we have the one parent that says I have to work and pay the bills. This parent works two jobs. By the time she gets home her children are in bed. She hasn’t seen them since they left for the school bus. She says they’ve text throughout the day and they are ok. Are they really? Also she believes they love hanging out with their friends and they don’t care if she goes to work. But for some reason one daughter is always calling her at work saying she’s sick. She wants her mom to come pick her up and stay with her at home. She sends dad.
She says they have everything they ask for. That’s why I’m working so much. I take them on a vacation every summer. We have a lake house. I have to work and have my life. She’s right. But is there a cost.
Then she says there’s no need to go to parent teacher conference. Her kids aren’t failing. She thinks her kids doesn’t want her at events, they don’t care. She and her husband told their son because they had to work 2 jobs he couldn’t join baseball because they couldn’t commit. 3 SELF CARE MISTAKES I MADE AS A STAY AT HOME MOM
On the other hand, we have the one who says I’m going to go to every event, game, show, award ceremony my kid have. I’ll live a subtle life to spend time with the kids. They don’t need name brand stuff all the time. She works just under 40 hours and leaves at 4pm because she says getting off at 5pm is too late for her to start her evening with the kids. They have TV shows they watch together. They eat dinner together. She’s the carpool mom and is very inquisitive about their friends and social life.
She says she’s being a concerned mom. She wants to know everything about them and be there for them. Is there a such thing as a helicopter mom?
Yes kids love having “stuff”. But at the end of the day they want mom or dad there. Not necessarily engaging, but available. They want that comfort and security of knowing you’re around. Or else the risk of the kids learning and finding their way without you can hurt them and the relationship.
A couple weeks ago my daughter had an award ceremony because she was nominated for Student Of The Month. During this ceremony there were also other awards given for different categories and grades. Sure the ceremony was on a Friday morning at 9am. They had coffee, donuts, milk and water for us to snack on with our kid until the ceremony started. We were able to mix and mingle with the other parents as well.
However, it broke my heart so bad that a couple of kids didn’t have parents to show. These were huge awards that all teachers and counselors voted on for a particular student. They were eating donuts alone. Looking so sad. At one point I even told my daughter to go tell one student to come sit with us. I just couldn’t help it.
When their name were called up, the counselor read the loving note from the teacher that nominated them. They received their award and took photos. The body language and the barely there smile killed me. At some point I heard a little guy say, my mom couldn’t come she had to work.
Yes you have to work. May not be able to get off every time. But unfortunately, the only things the kids see and remember is being alone at some pretty great moments. No material thing can get rid of that.
My intentions this week is to be in the moment, remain calm, and let things play out how they are supposed to.
Sunday: Very beautiful outside. Had breakfast with the kids and published WEEKLY BLOG: EASTER SUNDAY, LONG WORK DAYS, & SUMMER PLANNING. In the afternoon, I plan to post more listings on Poshmark and do a closet clear out. Later in the evening I will do my daughters hair and after that probably done for the day. Her hair takes me almost 3 hours to do. After spending 3 hours posting listings on Poshmark, I had to postpone doing my daughters hair. We capped the evening early with some double fudge brownies.
Monday: Very brisk and cool morning. I’m am motivated today to get up and start the week. Before heading off to work I left a honey-do-list since the hubs was off. I had a very good day at the office today. Stayed a little late to help out the new agent. After having a snack and getting comfortable, I did my daugters hair. That took me to late evening. All I want to do is bathe and lay down.
Tuesday: Great sunny cool morning. Drop was amazing, had a great breakfast with the hubs, and was able to finalize some sales on Poshmark. Office time was great with the new agent. She’s adjusting very well and will fit in to the culture of our office. After work, we had some errands to run and finish finalizing a quick staycay for this weekend. The kids are ready to have some fun and relax. In the evening the hubs and I decided to have an impromptu date night. We both were feeling like we needed time to recoup, talk, and take a breather. Late night hours before bed I was in a mood to finish a couple loads of laundry. Eventually I decided to shower, cleanse my face, brush my teeth and head off to bed.
Wednesday: Busy morning due to a doctors appointment early. None the less, we got off to a great start and the adjustments worked out perfect. It’s very nice and warm out today before we head into days of thunderstorms. After work I decided to do a good mid week clean. We have some plans for Friday and Saturday so I wanted to make sure the house was together before the weekend. Also I’m so proud of myself for cooking two meals at dinner to help prepare me for tomorrow.
Thursday: Typical morning. I think we’re all ready for this year to be over with. I was busy today with errands before heading into the office. Training the new agent has been going very well. She’s open and receptive. Not too much going on after school. We’re expected to have a busy weekend. So relaxing tonight was all needed. I was feeling like I wanted to do alot so I decided to get on the treadmill to calm myself.
Friday: Humid, rainy, lightning, and thunder. Need I say more. It’s dark and I just want to go back to bed. However, school and work must go on. Because of the weather it was very quiet in the office. Once again, I was able to get much needed notes, proposals, and contracts done. After work and school we had a couple of hours before my son had to work movie night at the school. He’s a student ambassador so he’ll be working concession. Moving night turned out great even though they didn’t move it inside.
Saturday: Very busy morning. The boys went and got hair cuts. I also went to get my hair trimmed. Then we had to head off to a birthday party at the lake. The weather was perfect for a party out in the park on the lake. Then we ended up having a great long family outing afterwards. At the end of the night we were all tired and ready for bed. But it was a great full day.
Have a great week everyone!!!!!
P.S. Weekly blog is designed to show the realistic life of a mom balancing life, family, work, and herself.
This week we are focusing on the end of the school year. What camps the kids are going to go to or if they want to go. Also because an agent left, I’m going to be working longer days until the new agent gets comfortable.
Sunday: Happy Easter!!!!!!! After getting in late last night from game night night, we showered and went to bed. My plans were to get up early and cook. I wanted to have dinner early and have a little time in the evening to relax before the work week. Because my kids are older some of the traditions we just don’t do anymore. I did get up early and have dinner ready by late afternoon early evening. We enjoyed more game night and then relaxed. The kids had a great time, enjoyed the food, and family. That is all that matters. We capped the evening off watching the NBA playoffs.
Monday: Finally a work day in which I don’t struggle to get up. Very brisk and cool this morning. Great start to a work week. Prepared to be at the office longer than usual this week. However, it made for a good day because I was busy all day. Dinner was simple because we had leftovers from Easter Sunday. After a long day and work out I was ready to turn in early.
Tuesday: I feel good this morning. I’m going to have a great day even though I will be at the office longer than usual. Had a good coffee date with the hubs this morning. And I had a chance to publish WHICH SELF CARE CATEGORIES ARE YOU DOING WELL IN?. It’s sunny but cool out. Until more storms tonight. Today we are planning our summer ”vacations”. We aren’t going to do a week long vacay anywhere. However, my family enjoys 3-4 day adventures to different cities and places. The kids have had a couple of request so we’re going to begin planning and prepping for that.
Wednesday: Cold rainy morning. Enjoyed coffee run with the hubs again, as we plan our son 16th birthday. Late last night we were successful in planning our summerplans and we wanted to begin the fall. Does anyone else do quarterly or seasonal planning? Sometimes we just like to have an idea or throw some things out there ahead of time. Couldn’t stay late at work today due to scheduling. Great evening with kids. It’s only 25 more school days and keeping them motivated is a challenge. But we’re getting through it.
Thursday: Very good journal writing session before heading off to work. I was feeling a little anxious. I have so much in my head I want to do or have started and exercising patience has been challenging. Even though I was very busy at the office today I was able to do some planning, create some ideas, and prepare for the second half of the year. After work, because it’s so beautiful out, I decided to walk outside. The calmness, clarity, and peace was amazing for me to have a great night in. Before bed, we finalized our plans for Mother’s Day.
Friday: Sort of busy this morning. With running errands and dropping off packages. Another long day at the office for me. Ready to check out for the weekend. Right now there isn’t too much planned for the weekend. I plan to do some work from home to get started on my summergoals and second half of the year goals. After work, which was a great day, my son tells me theres an event at his school he wants to go to. So now there is a wrench thrown in my plans. Also my aunt is leaving tomorrow so we were going to moms for the evening. WEEKLY BLOG: NEW PERFUME, DETOX, & VISIT FROM AUNT After dropping my son off, we headed to moms until the event was over.
Saturday: I have some plans to edit ideas and posts, as well as pictures for Poshmark. My aunt left early this morning and now I’m awaiting her safe call. It’s very nice outside so after work I plan to go out for a walk. Our Saturday was very chill relaxing. The hubs and I did some financial planning and discussed some things we wanted to do with the kids more. The kids opted to stay in and relax.
Have a great week everyone!!!!!
P.S. Weekly blog is designed to show the realistic life of a working mom balancing life, family, and myself.
”Feelings are much like waves, we can’t stop them from coming but we can choose which ones to surf.”-Jonatan Martensson
This week I’m am focused on catching up with some contracts, proposals, and listings. For the last couple of weeks I’ve been emotionally drained. My mother had an out patient procedure done. She’s home and recovering well. So now I’m jumping back into the sack and plus the kids were on springbreak last week.
Sunday: Night 2 of Wrestlemania. My son and husband are huge wrestling fans. Wrestlemania is always a big deal in our home. Because we stayed up late for night 1, we slept in. As usual, have a big family breakfast, I worked out early, and got the kids ready. The pre-show started at 5p.m. After working out, we opted for a finger food dinner and watched Wrestlemania until late night. We enjoyed the show and headed off to bed afterwards.
Monday: Back to business. It’s always hard getting the kids back into gear after a long week of staying up and sleeping in. But the morning went off without a hitch. Work is a roller coaster because we have a agent that’s leaving. The plus side is we’re slow right now so the transition is going ok. After school we had dinner early and the kids relaxed. Because it was so pretty out, I had to go for a walk. We wanted to turn in early because the NCAA championship game was coming on. Late into the evening we stayed up until the game went off.
Tuesday: Staying up late the last two nights has me very sluggish in the morning. But I’ll take the moments when I can. It’s ACT testing day and my son is headed off and ready to go. The morning routine went well even though it was rainy and dreary out. Work was steady and peaceful. The quiet time at the office I’ve been using to send out proposals and manage my listings on Poshmark. The rain subsided, so the day turned out to be nice and breezy. Although I said I was going to give my legs a break I’m going to head for a quick walk. Capped the evening off with posting more listings on Poshmark.
Wednesday: I had a little interruption in my morning routine. My annual wellness visit to the doctor was rescheduled for 8am today. Handle Your Business…Go To The Doctor So the hubs and I had to split drop off. The doc visit went very well and glad I was able to get it over with. Heading to the office it’s very windy and cool out. I wasn’t busy at all today which left me time to work on scheduling interviews for some freelance contracts. (This is how you work a side hustle. Use your time wisely. It can be done.) I decided to take the evening off and give my body a break from working out. The evening was very chill. After dinner I worked a little bit, had a cup of tea, and channel surfed. We will have a long day tomorrow because we’re catching an early screening of the new Sonic movie. My son is a huge fan of Sonic the Hedgehog.
Thursday: MOVIE NIGHT!!!!!! My son is super excited to go to this Sonic movie. But business is first. Morning routine went off great. My hubs went in later in the morning so he was able to join me on the drop off. Of course, we stopped at our favorite cafe to have coffee and a quick bite to eat before we head off to work. However, I made a pit stop home to do some final edits and publish 3 NEWLYWED SELF CARE MISTAKES I MADE real quick. After work we had dinner and only 2hours before heading out to the movies. The movie was amazing. We all loved it. Afterwards grabbed a quick bite to eat and headed home. Everyone was ready to shower and go to bed. My daughter has art club in the morning so we have to wake up extra early.
Friday: We made it another week. The morning started extra early because we had to get to art club before school. Stayed up kinda late doing some contracts and more proposals. I said I wanted to get more listings posted on Poshmark and send out as many proposals as possible, and I’ve accomplished both. It’s kinda of cold and dreary this morning. What do you know, we woke up to a little snow. But it quickly subsided. There really isn’t much planned for this weekend. Relax and resetting. The evening turned out quiet, slow, and peaceful. We all came in got comfy and relaxed.
Saturday: This was a great Saturday as my husband says. We had breakfast and literally relaxed the rest of the day. Although it was sunny out, it was still quite cool. None of us wanted to go out. My husband had to go to his store for a couple hours. After that, he joined me in Netflix and chill. I found a good show to binge watch and enjoy. Late night, I did a quick tidy up before showering and bed. I was happy to relax and reset. I accomplished what I wanted in pumping our proposal’s and contracts.
Have a great week everyone.
P.S. Weekly blog is designed to show the realistic life of a working mom, balancing life, family, and myself.
Now that I’ve been married for 16 years this September, I can honestly say it’s been a ride. A good ride, but there were some mistakes I made as a newlywed. Honestly, so many men and women make mistakes as newlyweds. It’s the growth and journey that makes it worth it. Here are 3 newlywed mistakes I made. 3 SELF CARE MISTAKES I MADE AS A STAY AT HOME MOM
Making Myself Too Available Starting off, I wanted to make our bond, relationship, and unit as strong as possible. Going in, we both fell into our ”role” and mine was the super homemaker while he provided financially. My everyday routine and life was dedicated to ensure he didn’t have to lift a finger. There wasn’t anything for him to worry about. Even when he came home I was all ears on how his long day went. I watched whatever it is he watched to spend time with him, get interested in his interest, and to have someone to talk to. Although I was doing what I thought a wife should be, my mental and emotional needs was placed on the back burner. I felt like because I didn’t work outside the home I didn’t deserve anything. Not even a tube of lipstick.
Sometimes I would deliver him lunch at work when he wanted it. But then when I did get the guts to want to do something it was like lightening struck. He didn’t know what to do when I wasn’t there. I made him so comfortable that it was becoming codependent. One day talking to my brother he said ”stop making yourself too available”. I had never thought about it that way. I thought I was doing what I was supposed to as a wife. Now years later we have this thing figured out. When I tell him I need a break, order pizza, and figure it out for yourself, he gets it. He does whatever he needs to ensure I’m ok.
Put The Kids First So once again I thought (or we both) top priority was taking care of the kids. Giving them the life we desired them to have. Going above and beyond to provide. There was a point I went back to school for my medical billing coding certification. The professor asked us, “who was the most important person in my life.” Without hesitation , I said my kids. He immediately responded with shock and said, ”I thought you’d say your husband.” In my head, and my husbands, we put the kids first over everything.
Well now I understand why it’s important to put your spouse first. The kids are going to be loved and cared for no matter what. But my husband was there first and he is the reason I have kids. Now we make sure to put our marriage and relationship first. We have our date nights, tell the kids we need some time together , and got rid of the guilt. We used to feel so guilty for doing something for ourselves. The kids are fine. Actually it’s better and healthy for them to see mommy and daddy loving on each other. Now they tell us go out and have a date we’ll be fine.
I Lost Me I completely gave up everything. My dreams, hopes, and desires. Mom and wife was my title and I couldn’t have anything else. So I thought. Whatever I wanted to do, create, or start I forgot about and convinced myself I couldn’t do it. Something as simple as voicing what I wanted to eat became, ”whatever you guys want I’ll eat.” My sense of individuality was gone.
I did the bare minimum when it came to my appearance. I didn’t play in makeup, workout as much, watch my diet, read, write, or any other hobbies I desired. Don’t get me wrong, I dreamed like crazy. It was burning inside me, but I didn’t pursue anything. Now I completely made up for it, because when I did start I dabbled in everything. It makes for a better relationship and marriage.
Those are just 3 mistakes that I made in the beginning of my marriage. We have this idea or is taught to be a certain way. When the right way is what you and your partner decides. Just like life, marriage is a journey. Who you were at the beginning isn’t who you are year 3, year 7, or year 15. It’s about growth, communication, and understanding it’s a never ending road.
This week I just wanted to enjoy the spring weather. All week the forecast is in the upper 70’s and on a couple of days we shall approach the 80 mark. My plan is to be outside as much as possible.
Sunday: Oh, I lost an hour of sleep. But spring is finally here and the sun is shining bright. I decided to go for a walk early afternoon to enjoy the weather. Boy, was it beautiful with a nice breeze. I was able to pray, meditate, and cleanse my mental. It felt amazing. Afterwards we had a great lunch and I did some editing. WEEKLY BLOG: NEW PERFUME, DETOX, & VISIT FROM AUNT. Later that evening we relaxed, watched a ton of college basketball, and enjoyed a great evening at my moms with her and my aunt.
Monday: Great start to the week and good morning. The sun is beautiful and the weather makes me want to stay home and go outside. However, work needs to be done. Had a great day at the office not too busy for a Monday. But was able to get some work done. The only thing on my agenda is to go for a walk as soon as possible because this 70ish degree weather feels great. Later in the evening the kids decided to lay around and thats when I took the chance to go out for a walk. It’s always nice to go out after work and commuting all day. This is my best form of therapy. I literally escaped and felt 10lbs lighter mentally and emotionally.
Tuesday: Ok, I think the timechange and springing forward has began to bother me. Usually in the morning I’m not too draggy. But I have realized in the last couple of days, I’ve been a little sluggish to get up. Hopefully my continual detox, walking, and night routineSelf Care: Sleep Routine helps me get back on track. However, I was feeling in the spirit after watching a great Joel Osteen sermon on Youtube. Work was the usual but I was able to get in some great note taking, brainstorming ideas, and some good reads. Later that evening, of course I went out. But this walk was special because I asked my daughter to go and she eagerly agreed to my surprise. It was a great time being able to connect and talk to her while we walked.
Wednesday: This morning started great. I usually do the morning drop off with all three kids. However, my son asked dad to go so he decided to go in late to work to give my son his request. Afterwards we decided to have breakfast at our favorite cafe before heading to work. This set up for a great rest of the day. I’ve learned when moments come, take them and enjoy them. Later on, we had an early dinner and the hubs and I decided to go out together. I love spending time with him and walking. Furthermore, we get to talk and have great conversation without the kids around. Lastly, I had to order my mom a new phone because I do take care of certain things for her.
Thursday: We had a horrible night and morning. So my youngest son, was up every two hours because he couldn’t breathe, sneezing, and sniffles. Well it was only allergies flaring up. He’d been outside all week so far and this is typical at this time of year. But because he didn’t get sleep, nor did I, we just stayed home and recouped. Of course, I always use this time to catch up on editing, writing, and contracts. All while doing things around the house. Throughout the day he progressively got better. My oldest son was having allergy flare ups as well, but he opted to go to school and tough it out. The evening was capped early. After walking, I got a cup of tea DIY…Starbucks Medicine Ball and turned it in.
Friday: T.G.I.F. TGIF: SELF CARE IS ALL AROUND YOU This day started great. Not as warm as previous days but still spring is in the air. My agenda for today was to clean and get some things done because we have plans for the weekend. As always the kids are happy it’s the weekend. They had testing this week so they wanted to order takeout and relax the rest of the evening. Naturally we didn’t want what the kids chose. So we, instead had an early date night and that was lovely. We enjoyed ourselves and the restaurant. The temps had dropped a little so I was ready to go home and binge watch T.V. under a throw. Because I had walked every day, I decided to give my body a break, take the evening off, and relax.
Saturday: My mom phone arrived. However, her phone case hasn’t yet. The last phone she dropped and it broke, so she’ll get the new phone with case in hand. We have plans to go to a basketball tournament later, so I went out for a walk early. It was beautiful and breezy out. Late afternoon, we decided to head to the tournament early so we could see several games. Once we purchased tickets, we could watch as many games as we wanted. But first, my youngest son didn’t want to go, so we dropped him off with grandma and my aunt. The games were very exciting, the kids played great, and we enjoyed ourselves. Afterwards, we had a great time at dinner. In the end we picked up my son, and turned in.
That was my full productive week. I had time with myself, my family, and went out with my husband, and enjoyed some fun activities, and worked. Some weeks I don’t balance it well and others I do amazing. But that is balancing everyday life. No two days will ever be the same, nor do I want them to. That would be boring. Embracing each day as it comes keeps me on my toes, challenges me, and breaks me out my comfort zone.
Have a great week.
P.S. Weekly Blog is designed to show the realistic life of a working mom, balancing life, family, and myself.
It’s the end of February and I know March is around the corner. We’re expecting very warm spring like temps this week. So my mind, subconscious, and body is ready for spring.
Sunday: It’s bright and sunny early. The temps are already on a rise and the first thing I did was open the blinds to let some sunshine in. Had a huge breakfast with the family instead of going to the cafe. After that I began laundry as usual. There is just something in me, that can’t not do anything. Even if its running the washer, dishwasher, or vacuum. At the end of the day I have to feel productive. I’m working on it. But we ended up couch sitting and watched the highly talked about documentary ”The Tinder Swindler.” Later on in the evening, we got ready for the week and enjoyed our evening relaxing.
Monday: Oh was it rough getting the kids up early back in school mode. But the morning went on without a hitch. It’s feeling like spring as I wake up and realize, it’s brighter than normal. After dropping the kids off at school, I had a great moment to myself drinking coffee and brainstorming ideas. Listened to some really great inspirational videos before heading off to work. OMG!!! Work was busy. But it felt good though after being quiet for quite some time. While having a great warm sunny spring like temp day, I enjoyed the evening with a walk outside. It felt amazing. The smell, sounds, trees, and wind was very therapeutic.
Tuesday: Great start to the morning. Experimented with my breakfast by adding some protein waffles with my eggs and bacon. HEALTHY LIFESTYLE: 5 SIMPLE AND QUICK BREAKFAST IDEAS They turned out really good. After my husband thought they wouldn’t be very tasty. Another very busy day at work. It seemed as if the phone wouldn’t stop ringing. But a busy day, makes the time go by faster.
Wednesday: It’s still very spring like out and I’m enjoying every bit of it. Once again it was a little busy at the office. This is always expected this time of year, but the clients have been a little testing. Testing my patience. But I get through it with a smile. Starting today the tail end of the week is going to busy because it’s spirit week at my son school and he’s participating everyday. Tonight it’s karaoke and power puff football. It made for a great evening with the spring like weather. It was good to get out and see the kids have fun.
Thursday: Spring is still in the air with the sunshine. The office was back to quiet as normal. Later in the evening I had to run errands and exchange some shoes for my son. Of course, the kids didn’t want to hang out. Instead chose to stay home. However, that left for me and the hubs to have an impromptu ice cream date at Cold Stone Creamery. We hadn’t been there for years and it was delicious. It felt good to be able to sit out and have a moment while enjoying ice cream. WEEKLY BLOG: CALM AND STILLNESS
Friday: Busy start of the day. As my daughter has art club meeting early in the morning. Getting started early and out was great. I had to stay late at work but it wasn’t too crazy. The clients actually behaved. Later on my son went to the talent show at his school while the rest of us went to Dairy Queen for blizzards. My daughter was kind of bummed out because she wanted to go, but it was for the kids in his school only. I must say, it felt so wierd just having two kids. As a mom I felt like I was missing something. Later that night, we picked him up, he had a great time, and enjoyed being home.
Saturday: I didn’t personally have too much planned. But my son was going to hang out with his friends before the dance later on in the evening. So naturally, I left my schedule and to do list, empty because I knew I was in chauffeur mode all day. I didn’t mind and was excited, because he is on the spectrum and breaking out of his shell.
Well that was my week. Hope you all had a great week.
P.S. Weekly blog is designed to show the realistic life of a working mom balancing life, family, marriage, and myself.
This week my intentions were to let the days come natural to me. Once again, the kids had a 4 day weekend and getting in and out of routine hasn’t been the easiest. But even with the snow days 3 weeks in a row we adjusted on the fly well.
Sunday: The morning was great and started a little late. It felt good to get up and let the day come natural. Because the kids didn’t have school on Monday (presidents day) I knew we could relax a bit extra. My husband and I didn’t do our Sunday morning cafe coffee run because my mom came over and we talked the time away. After she left it was business as usual with cleaning, laundry, and having an early dinner. Because my husband also took off to have a 3 day weekend I didn’t want to be overwhelmed with work and not spend time together. The evening for me began early. After a workout I was able to enjoy some quality T.V. time.
Monday: So I was the only one who prepared to get up this morning and go to work. It’s presidents day and the kids are out of school and my husband took off work. However, upon getting up and getting dressed I had a light bulb moment, and remembered we were closed as well. I had to text a coworker to remember and she confirmed for me. Another day off. Yayyyyyyy!!!!!!!!!! I was super excited to be off with the entire fam and have nothing on the to do list. But since I was up early I proceeded to clean, have coffee, do laundry, and binge watch ID Discovery. The rest of the day was spent enjoying a peaceful relaxing day.
Tuesday: Unseasonably warm today. No wonder we’re expecting snow and ice again on Thursday. Back to business as usual with school and work, but made it a point to go out and enjoy the spring like temps before winter weather rolls in again. Had a very quiet and slow day at the office. Spent the evening walking outside enjoying the sun.
Wednesday: My morning was going great. Always a pleasure to wake up, fix hot breakfast for my kids and husband, and see everyone off. That is, until my husband calls me and says there is something wrong with our truck. He immediately took it to the mechanic and now my morning has hit a fork in the road. Instead of having a moment to myself after I drop the kids off, I have to meet him at the mechanic and pick him up. Because we’re expecting another round of snow and ice we knew we wouldn’t have answers today. They said they would be closing early and heading home.
I’m proud of myself because we came home to let it process and figure out our next steps before heading to work. Usually when something like this happens it sends you into a frenzy. I knew I was off tomorrow so it wasn’t a big rush to get it fixed right away.
Thursday: Snow day as expected. The kids are off and so am I. The temps are drastically cold and different from two days ago. After my husband left I decided to sit and have a moment to myself before the kids woke up. However, that was short lived, because we got a call about our car and what was wrong with it. I was really expecting the worst. But it turned out not to be that bad. But due to the weather we wouldn’t be able to pick it up until tomorrow. I was in gratitude mode all day. More importantly grateful for me keeping my calm and not worrying myself sick over the car. After a gloomy snowy day I was ready for the weekend. We received a call late that the kids would have school. WEEKLY BLOG: CALM AND STILLNESS
Friday: What do you know? At 5:30 a.m. we received a call from the school saying road conditions were too bad, and they were cancelling school all together. This is the third week in a row that they’ve had 4 day weekend. But there is always a brighter side. The teachers got a much needed break. We still had to pick up our car from the mechanic and I chose to truck it through the winter weather and go to work. The kids stayed home with dad and enjoyed yet another day off. I did my usual Friday grocery store run and went on a cleaning spree. You know sometimes you just get into a cleaning mode. Because it was cold out still, we spent our Friday evening watching T.V. and staying warm.
Saturday: Not too much planned. My boys had hair cut appointments and I chose to spend the afternoon cleaning up the ice melt that was tracked in from outside. I was able to have a great moment of brainstorming ideas, blogpost, and edit. I was able to get a workout in early because we wanted to take the kids out for dinner. However, they opted to order in and didn’t want to go. We, of course, took advantage of the moment and decided to go have our Saturday night date night since they didn’t want to hang out with us. It was refreshing after being snowed in the last couple of weekends. We capped the night off binge watching Netflix.
My take away from this week was everything will work out. Take advantage of the time that I have to spend with my family. Don’t let things out of your control ruin your day or week.
Have a great day and week!!!!!!
P.S. Weekly blog is designed to show the realistic life of a working mom balancing life, family, marriage, and myself.
I totally loved being a stay at home mom and low key want to go back to being a stay at home mom. However, there are some mistakes I made being a stay at home mom. Here are some of my mistakes and tips for you, so you won’t make the same one’s I did.
First off, I didn’t think of it as a job. I felt like I wasn’t bringing in actual income, so I wasn’t contributing. Because I wasn’t “working” outside the home I felt I couldn’t ask for help. Nor could I even think about saying I was tired. That couldn’t been further from the truth. Let me tell you, running and maintaining a home is work. It’s constant managing and balancing everything. All the cooking, cleaning, and laundry you do is work and contributing to the home.
Giving your spouse the peace of mind to not worry about anything is a huge contribution. Whatever you do to make the home run smoothly, save money, and provide comfort is constant support. So yes, therefore it is a full time job and then some. There isn’t a dollar amount you can place on that.
The second mistake I made as a stay at home mom was not practicing self care. Once again because I didn’t work outside the home and had small babies at home, I had to be in sweats all day. So I thought. In my head, I wasn’t going anywhere on a daily, so why get up and do anything to myself. I really didn’t focus on myself or do much to boost my energy and self esteem. In my mind, I was a stay at home mom and that’s the only thing I was allowed to focus on.
The thought of me not bringing in any income, made me believe I didn’t deserve anything. That went across the board. Clothes, shoes, makeup, vacations, and any thing else I thought would make me happy.
Trust me your kids and partner want you to practice self care. Taking care of yourself is taking care of your family. You deserve to look good, feel good, and have whatever it is you want. You will feel better about yourself and approach the days with more excitement and enthusiasm.
The last mistake I made was not having a hobby outside of the family. I had nothing to focus on to keep my mental intact. Having that breather or moment to myself I didn’t give myself permission for. It is painfully important as a stay at home mom to have your own hobby Self Care: Hobbies and Activities. Something that is completely you. The one thing that gets your mind off of everything and refuels you.
If I could go back, I would definitely make time for myself, create a space for me to do something that makes me happy, and give myself a break. It truly is a honor and gift if you have the luxury to be a stay at home mom. Be thankful and grateful that you have that gift.
Obviously there are many factors that contributed to me having the feelings I did. For starters, I had no support from my family. However, my husband was amazing at encouraging and motivating me. He tried to do everything to make me feel good and a contributing partner. I was looked at as being lazy, messing up my kids because I didn’t put them in day care, and wasting my degree that I received. Because I was young, I began to believe certain things and internalized them. In my mind, I had a completely different point of view. However my efforts, to share and explain fell on deaf ears.
Being a stay at home mom is hard work and time is going to fly by. Take care of yourself first and the rest will fall into place. If you are a stay at home mom, know you are doing a great job. Don’t let lack of support or outsiders tell you any different. Seek support, encouragement, and motivation outside if you have to.
Be you so you can be free.
Enjoy this blog? Please follow and come back for more inspiration :)