Healthy Lifestyle · Mental Health · Self care · Spiritual Health

It Is Ok…

It Is Ok

To Cry
To Laugh
Take a day off
Not answer the phone
Eat Cake
Say you’re tired
Feel anxious
To Change your mind
Let go and be done
Feel Sad
Feel Nervousness
Experience an episode of depression
Want to splurge and purchase something
Need a vacation
Want a vacation
Like being alone
Move to another city, state, or country
Switch jobs or careers
Disconnect from the world from time to time
Say No
Say Yes
Ask for what you want
Feel how you feel
Be who you are
Protect yourself…or others
Be different
Look different
Try something different
Want to just do nothing
Be confused
Start over…more than once
It is ok to not be ok

It is OK!!!!!

RosalynLynn

Be you so you can be free.

Personal Growth · Self care · Spiritual Health

STRENGTH

Take Your Power Back

S-Seek the “why”. When we are feeling hopeless, down, and in despair so often we can’t put our finger on how we ended up there. But figuring out the why, how, and what will lead us to the beginning of healing. We can’t pick ourselves up until we understand how we got to where we are.

T-Trust your instinct. How many times have we ignored our gut or went with the second choice instead of the first? Don’t let yourself and others talk you out of what you feel is right.

R-Recharge and reenergize yourself. After so long its easy to get into a slump. But find a way to get yourself back up and ready to fight. The more simple the better. A hot shower, nice walk, and a phone call to a friend will put you in a mood to get up and give it another try.

E-Experience every emotion you feel. When we allow ourselves to feel no matter how much it may hurt, we gather so much strength. If we always run we won’t know our actual strength that we possess.

N-Navigate at your own speed. Run your own race. One of our biggest mistakes is allowing others to dictate when we should get over something, do something, feel something, or just be.

G-Grind it out. Nothing in life that is worth having comes easy or free. Put in the time and work needed to achieve your dream or goal. What you put in, is what you’ll get out. Even if you only have an hour or 30 minutes, use that time to do something.

T-Talk yourself out of it. Talk to yourself aloud while doing housework, driving in the car, or working out. This has been a great tool for me. Have a conversation with yourself and think those thoughts through.

H-Hold on to the good. Even in the most difficult times we can learn a lesson or pick up something. For that matter, we can even learn something from the one person that hurt us, pick up the good and leave the rest.

RosalynLynn

Be you so you can be free.

Healthy Lifestyle · Personal Growth · Self care

What Self Care Is NOT

  1. Self Care isn’t selfish. Being the best you can be to your loved ones is a gift that benefits everyone.
  2. Self care isn’t a quick fix. It’s consistent daily practices to have a fulfilling life.
  3. Self care isn’t a one and done thing. It’s a lifestyle and some practices may change or have to adjust as you grow through life.
  4. Self care doesn’t erase your problems. It’s your foundation and what you fall back on to get you back on track.
  5. Self care doesn’t mean you aren’t going to get upset or have a bad day. It allows you to overcome, forgive, and move on faster than before.
  6. Self care doesn’t make you perfect. It says “I am human and have emotions that I need to deal with as they come.”
  7. Self care doesn’t mean you aren’t going to break from routine. It gives you experience on knowing how to regroup and get back to you.
  8. Self care doesn’t mean that you are depressed or angry. It’s the act of creating a good mental and emotional space.
  9. Self care isn’t the only thing that is going to make your life better. It’s a prong on your life wheel that you need on your journey.
  10. Self care doesn’t look the same for everyone. It’s intentional, thoughtful, and catered to your personal needs.



    RosalynLynn

Be you so you can be free.

Healthy Lifestyle · Personal Growth · Self care

Self Care: Sleep Routine

As I’ve approached a certain age, the importance of me getting the proper amount of sleep has become a priority. Once I realized and admitted to myself that sleep is an essential part of my self care routine and I needed to make it a priority, the next step was me creating a sleep routine or nighttime routine.

So often at the end of the night we go take a shower or bath, lights out, and then go to bed. You ever find yourself not able to fall asleep, restless, still have a million things on your mind, and eventually you don’t get a good nights rest. Well that’s because body has laid down but your mind is still wide awake.

Why Getting Proper Sleep is Important

Sleep is important because its our charge and refuel for the next day. Just like you plug in your phone at night, our mind and body needs to be charged.

Mentally getting proper sleep helps us the next day remain alert, focus, and prepared to attentively tackle the day. When we are tired mentally, we’re more apt to be anxious which leads to anger and frustration. Lack of proper sleep leads to more stress and mentally being broken down.

Physically, when we get proper sleep, our bodies are rejuvenated and energized to get through the next day. Sleep gives our muscles a break and let them rebuild. Lack of sleep leaves our bodies feeling heavy, stiff, and fatigued.

Getting enough sleep allows our emotional health to remain stable. Because we’re tired mentally and physically the way we begin to process the days course is off. The smallest detour in the day may cause you to lash out, have a breakdown, and the snowball would just keep rolling.

Our productivity when we get sleep in increased. Having the energy to complete tasks, maneuver all the balls we juggle, and have the ability to prioritize is because the sleep has allowed our mind and body to recharge.

How to Create A Sleep routine

A sleep routine or nighttime routine is important because you need to unwind and unpack the days events. It’s sort of sealing or capping off the day so it does’t carry over into the next. Not having a routine will allow the days to run over and you still won’t rest at night.

Having a sleep or nighttime routine doesn’t have to take long, its time set aside to get you prepared for the next day, let go of what was today, and keeps your wellness in check.

The first thing is to pick a time to get started. The easiest way to get started is by tidying up the house and making sure its ready for the next day. This not only physically sets you up for success in the morning, but it puts your mental in a space of resetting. It may change or adjust as you become comfortable or life happen. Of course its going to vary depending on your career, if you have a family, and the days events.

Next in creating a sleep or night routine is logging off. That means checking emails, social media, playing your favorite games, and yes even watching the news. You don’t want the last thing you see or hear to be something that is going to interrupt you mental space when lying down to sleep.

In addition to logging off make sure you have written down or looked over your to do list or appointments for the next day. You know where you have to be and when. This one in particular is important for me because I can then create an outfit in my head for work or even get it out.

Of course a sleep or nighttime routine isn’ t complete without a shower or bath to wash the day down the drain. Take your time as this may be the only moment to yourself you have all day. Do your skincare routine and prep your hair for the next day. When we look good, we feel good, and present our best selves.

Lastly make it a point to get in the bed around the same time every night. When you do, don’t sit up and watch television. Decide to journal or read for 30 minutes. Listen to some soft music or read a devotional, my favorite.

Creating a routine puts our mental and a physical in clear headspace that set us up for productivity the next day. Most of the time we are so drained that we are in a rush, making decisions that aren’t thought out, and leads to stress and breakdown.

Sleep is important for everyone no matter what you’re doing, where you’re going, and what you have.

RosalynLynn

Be you so you can be free.

Mental Health · Personal Growth · Self care

I AM NOT A EXPERT

Disclaimer: I am not an expert. I am an expert of my life and my experiences. In fact, my degree is in Business Administration. However, in my time on this earth I have experienced some episodes that has brought me here to share, help, and grow with others. I came to a point where I wasn’t embarrassed to say I’m feeling depressed, sad, unhappy with my career, want to hit a reset button, or just in mood.

Once I got to the point of not feeling embarrassed, I was able to share and not go through it alone. The moment I shared my true feelings, I immediately felt 10lbs lighter, realized I wasn’t the only one, and wanted to make everyone feel good and get better. I knew I wanted to and needed to share with others they aren’t alone and its quite normal to have certain feelings.

The biggest mistake we make is not sharing, reaching out for help, or my reason, feeling like we are going to burden family and friends with our problems. So often we have this misconception that once we graduate from college and start a family, every thing is going to be roses. Welp that couldn’t be further from the truth and balancing that in itself is stressful.

After some reflections, I realized there was a period of time, approximately two years, I distanced myself from everyone until I was comfortable and confident enough to present myself as ME. In my distanced time, I reflected on what was making me angry, what I was anxious about in my professional career, what direction I wanted to go in my life, what kind of life I wanted to show my kids, and how I was going to get there.

I literally began speaking honestly with myself, my true feelings, what I wanted, and why I was making the decisions I was. Then I, unconsciously, began speaking them to my husband and once I did that I knew I was coming into me and feeling more confident.

My awareness was at its highest and still is. I began to notice how excited, passionate, and selfless I became when I would encourage others to live for themselves when they expressed to me they are unhappy.

I am not an expert. In fact, there are still times I feel stressed and emotionally drained. Guess what, that is a part of life. It’s how we deal with things thats going to determine what road we end up on. I rely on the tools that got me to this point when I begin to feel some type of way.

Please don’t feel like once you reach a point of ease its finished. This is a journey without a destination. Remembering the why you’re on this journey, what you want to get out of it, and where you want to end up will always get us back on track when we make a wrong turn or hit a bump in the road.

RosalynLynn

Be you so you can be free.

Personal Growth · Self care · Spiritual Health

LIFE…We Only Get One

L-Learn. Read, listen to podcast, and watch videos. If you have a hobby, or interest in something learn as much as you can about it as often as you can. In life, we can never stop learning.

I-Imagine your future and make it happen. You can create and live the life you want.

F-Feel the pain. So often we want to push it away and pretend it isn’t there. If we embrace it and figure out why we experienced that emotion it will lead us to healing and a better version of ourselves.

E-Entertain that crazy thought or dream. If we imagined it, then we can achieve it. The crazier, more far out, and the more scary dreams are, the more rewarding and life fulfilling they will be. Remember we only get one shot at this thing called life.

RosalynLynn

Be you so you can be free.

Mental Health · Personal Growth · Self care

Are You A People Pleaser?

The most important thing for people to remember is they are enough the way God made them. They are unique and no else on this earth can be them no matter how hard they try. With knowing that we have people walking around living their life pleasing others while they suffer. Some are admitted people pleasers and others are in denial or just don’t know.

If you have to give up an arm, leg, and your big toe for others to want you to play with them in their sand box then they aren’t worth it. You don’t have to over extend or prove that you’re worthy. You being you is enough.

If you find yourself constantly apologizing even when you haven’t did anything or no one said anything then you need to stop. This means apologizing to your mate, friends, coworkers and even strangers. Apologizing isn’t going to make them like you more and doesn’t excuse their behavior towards you.

If you find you the one always volunteering your time and money specifically when no one else wants to then you need to stop it. Just because you are willing to lose sleep, time with your family, or spend your hard earned money doesn’t mean they are going to accept you for who you are. They are only going to continue to use you up dry.

If you never say no or always go with the flow then you need to stop it. Just because they invite you doesn’t mean they generally want you there. If you can’t give any input or suggestions on what you’re going to part take in and go anyway then you need to stop it. Most of the time they want you there to do the work they don’t want to.

I know it could be easier said than done but taking small baby steps builds your confidence more and more. You’ll begin to feel good that you stuck up for yourself. Yes those who are use to you giving in will be angry but they’ll either respect you creating boundaries or move on. With that decision you’ll know if they were really there for a true relationship with you.

RosalynLynn

Be you so you can be free.

Mental Health · Personal Growth · Self care

Self Care: 4 Mental Health Tips

There are many factors that play into the downfall of our mental and emotional health. So many circumstances from family, to work, to relationships, to past experiences and the list can go on for days. But there are some things we do on a daily that contribute to giving others the power of draining our emotional tank.

Stop Explaining Yourself

This is my biggest pet peeve when I see adult women specifically, crushing themselves trying to explain what they doing, where they going, why they chose to go left instead of right, and anything else. It’s even worse when they begin explaining without anyone even asking. Which that’s the first sign of someone not being confident in who they are. To be honest even if someone asked you, you still don’t owe anyone an explanation. If how you move about your life needs to be explained then they’re not on your level because if they were they would already know. The decisions you make for you and your family is no one else’s business as long as it doesn’t effect them.

Wasting Your Time Staying Angry

They were never lying when they said it takes a lot of energy to get angry and most importantly stay angry. It takes so much emotional energy to stay angry that people not only empty their tank but everyone else around them. Let just say when a wife gets mad at her husband the entire mood in the house shifts until she starts talking to him again. Even the kids start walking around on egg shells. You waste time that could be spent doing something productive. Not to mention when you stay that angry for some time you begin to not sleep well, which makes things worse and continue to spiral. At this point every thing including your physical body and beautiful face begin to suffer. It just isn’t worth it. Remember they hurt you once, don’t let them keep hurting you by staying angry. That would be giving away too much power.

Living Your Life for Others

When we allow others to influence our decisions we have given them the keys to drive our life. Letting someone tell you “you’re not ready”, “I don’t think that’s a good idea”, or “don’t you think you should wait a while“ are people that you need to keep at arms length. Those are all manipulative, controlling, and selfish ways people get you to do what they want you to do. Be confident in your journey to know what’s best for you and don’t let anyone convince you otherwise. Making decisions to please others leaves you as the only one suffering. No matter what you try to do nothing is going to make you happy until you live for you.

Staying in a One Sided Relationship

Having hopes and expectation for someone will get us every time. Also knowing the potential a person could have is the most common reason we constantly give so many chances to those who don’t deserve it. It’s true, when people show you who they are believe them. If the relationship makes you question who you are, what you do, or you always seem to be in a confused state then its time to leave. Our relationships should inspire us to be better people. We should feel so much love and support that we have to constantly give it away to others. With no respect, trust, or communication you’re wasting your time. This goes for our romantic relationship as well as our friendships.

These are simple practices that will save us heartache in our daily lives. The amount time spent worrying if someone understands us, feel we care, or sparing their feelings only wastes our time and drain our mental and emotional tank on empty.

They aren’t worth it.

RosalynLynn

Be you so you can be free.

Healthy Lifestyle · mental health · Personal Growth · Self care · Spiritual Health

FEAR

F-Finish what you started. Turn that thought into ideas to create a plan. Develop those ideas into a project. Design that project into a business. Whatever “it” is that you started or thought about starting FINISH it. It could be school, moving, weight loss goal, changing your hair color, or anything that was placed upon your heart.

E-Explore the world. When we travel and learn about different cultures it allows us to see life differently. It doesn’t have to be overseas, travel to a city or small town you never been to. What do they eat? Where does the dialect come from? We will have a better understanding of people. Of course right now staying safe and healthy is important.

A-Award yourself regularly. It doesn’t have to be something big. But we know you have a family and other responsibilities to take care of, however you should enjoy the fruits of your labor. Each time you get paid do something for yourself.

R-Release any tension, frustration, or aniety you may have. Find a way to let go of what was, what hurt you, or who made you mad. Holding on to that continues to hurt you not them. LET IT GO!!!!

RosalynLynn

Be you so you can be free.

Healthy Lifestyle · Mental Health · Personal Growth · Self care

Journaling…What I’ve Learned So Far

I used to be one of those who thought journaling or writing things down was useless or ineffective. A few months ago I decided to go and purchase a journal. Even after I purchased the notebook, it sat on my table a while before I put the pen to paper. Boy, I’ll tell you when I did it was like drinking a cold glass of cucumber lemon water on a hot summer day. It was so liberating and I can feel every brick that was on my shoulder being lifted. Every worry, negative thought, and bad feeling just left my mind, but most importantly my body and spirit.

I wasn’t going to make a specific commitment or had any idea of what my process was going to be.

The first thing I noticed in keeping a journal is I’m more aware. I can specifically point out why I got upset or why something hurt my feelings. In turn I am able to let it go and not steal my joy. The more I journaled, I noticed how I was able to communicate better not just with my husband but with my children and family.

Coupled with being more aware I noticed I’m more sympathetic to others and express empathy more. Being in tuned and having my emotional health stable allows me to be of great service to others. I can connect with others more and encourage them through their journeys . Using my journaling therapy to help others has given me a new sense passion to motivate others to be the most fulfilled.

It doesn’t have to make sense. For so long I thought when you journal you had to have correct spelling and grammar as if an English professor is grading it. Many times just jotting down my thoughts or feelings at the moment is more therapeutic than writing two pages. Sometimes its not a whole book that we need to read to get the message, in the same token a couple of random words may be the only thing that needs to be released.

Never say there isn’t anything to write about. I used to always think “what is there to write about”. Well guess what, there is plenty. Just picking up the pen and writing down the first thing that comes to mind is the best. Before you know it you may have several pages of purging.

I’m happier and doesn’t let things weigh on me. I’m not going to say things doesn’t bother me anymore but boy do I let it go quickly now. I don’t let people throw their trash to me and I keep it. Honey I’ll either let that trash fall and keep walking or simply laugh and keep walking.

You don’t have to do it everyday. I let my journal writing come natural to me. In doing this I noticed how much more relaxed I am and its ok if there is a shuffle in the schedule.

These are just a few things I’ve noticed in a couple of months. Journaling is something that is personal to you. If you are not in a good space, feeling depressed, having anxiety, or worried about what’s going to happen next I encourage you to begin journaling. Writing your thoughts down, being as angry as you want, as honest as you want, and completely vulnerable is the best free therapy you can have. It doesn’t have to be perfect or make sense. Just release the negative energy to make room for the positive.

RosalynLynn

Be you so you can be free.