Personal Growth · Self care · Self improvement

I Was Grown Before, But Now I Really Think I’m Grown

Something happens when you hit 40. I’ve always heard people talk about it and say how something shifts, it definitely does and it’s noticeable.

For starters, I no longer care about having a closet full of clothes and shoes. Let alone caring about the name or labels on the tags. My care has shifted to making sure my home is as cozy as possible. I enjoy walking through Menards, Lowes, and the Garden section in Walmart. Creating a home with positive energy, peace, comfort, and happiness tickles my fanny.

While creating a safe space to be free, I’ve adopted the less is more option. That is with everything. Clothes, shoes, makeup, skincare, knickknacks, decor, kitchen gadgets, and just stuff. I find myself throwing away a lot of “stuff” as I clean and do laundry.

The next thing I noticed, and this is what made me figure out the shift in myself, is I pay attention to what others say on certain topics, or what they don’t say specifically. I pay attention to a person actions towards others, positive and negative. I specifically watch to see if they cut corners, always wanting something extra, looking for a leg up, wanting favors, and just how they move in general.

“The best judgment of character is to watch how a person engage with others.”

Another thing that I noticed is my daily lifestyle habits are very important. You know when you’re younger, eating right isn’t at the top of the list. Also when you’re young and dumb, you think you never going to gain weight or you can lose it easily. Yeah Right!!!!!! Making sure I have healthy eating habits, exercising throughout the week, and oh, this is a big one, gettting my behind in the bed at night is a priority at the top of my list.

I begin to pay attention to those who don’t see drinking water and eating vegetables are a priority. I love it when a coworker or friend tell me they want to lose weight or going on this fad diet, while eating a bucket of ice cream. I will support and motivate anyone, but if you’re wasting my time by not being serious or taking your health serious then, I have to move on.

I’ve become more mindful on what I watch, read, and listen to. Because of the world we live in, I find myself constantly seeking motivational and inspiring content to consume to ensure I’m operating from a place of positivity. YouTube has tons of motivational content on all subject matters to keep your gas tank full. I can find long videos while I clean up or a quick video on the ride to work to keep me going. Pinterest has millions of inspirational quotes to get you through any situation. Of course we know Instagram has content that motivates us.

Side Note: The key to social media is to only click on the content that you seek, or aspire to indulge. That way the algorithm will only pull the content in which you want to see.

My insatiable desire to let everyone know they are worthy is mounting. It really pains me to hear or see of a individual feeling down, in despair, hopeless, and unmotivated.

You are bigger than the storm you going through. Remember storms are temporary.

I have become completely comfortable in feeling my feelings and not feeling bad about it. Feeling my feelings allows me to process it, talk it out, and move passed it. Which is great for my mental health. I encourage everyone to feel their feelings so you can learn and move forward. Ignoring or pretending like nothing bothers you, only hurts you and prevents you from being the best version of yourself.

I used to love going to the store to “just” look, now I only go when necessary and frankly I don’t even like doing that. It’s not so much about spending money or trying to save money, it’s not wanting be in the midst of the craziness that happens when you go shopping. Also, thats how I know I‘ve accomplished my goal of being at peace and content with what I have. There is nothing wrong with “wanting” more, but you have to start by being grateful for what you have now.

Which brings me to my next point, in being more financially aware or frugal. When I want something, I really think about it for some time. I go through a serious of questions: Do I really need it? Do I have a place for it? Can I afford it? Lastly on the financial tip, is I’d rather save and pay cash for it, instead of having debt and interest.

I really just don’t have time to argue. First of all, my blood pressure tells me girl you need to sit down, and you know what, they just aren’t worth it. I’ve learned to let go. The energy that it exhaust out of me is too much and most of the time its not going to change the outcome, circumstances , or how a person feels.

It feels good to not care what people think or say. This one took me a while. It wasn’t so much of what my friends thought, but wanting the approval from my family that I was doing right or making the right decisions stressed me out. Another one that took me a while to grasp, is to not take things personally when people are rude or disrespectful. The anger that they display has nothing to do with me.

Welp, thats a few things I’ve noticed that has changed in me. It feels good, I feel good, and I want y’all to have the same liberating feeling. Remember it’s a journey, there isn’t a destination, and I’m still hopping along.

RosalynLynn

Be you so you can be free.

Mental Health · Personal Growth · Self care

An Open Letter…To Anyone

Dear friend 🌹,

I know you’re in pain and I’m so sorry. You feel like there is a dark cloud over you, lurking. No matter what you do, it feels like you just can’t catch a break. For every two steps forward, you take one back. You feel so unappreciated, invisible, and dismissed. Everyone is take take take and no one ever stopped to ask you how you are doing or if you need help.

You can’t breath. You can’t think. You don’t know what’s going to happen from moment to moment. You’re always on edge. Feel like a ticking time bomb. Your life feels like a puzzle and all the pieces are on the table scattered. You don’t even have the frame together, let alone at least two pieces in the center. My dearest of friends I’m sorry.

Your feelings are absolutely valid. What you are feeling is right. There isn’t anything wrong with you. All you want someone to do is say thank you or ask are you ok. A simple kind gesture makes all the difference in how your day will go. For, you always make sure everyone else is good.

I’m here to tell you, it will get better. You deserve all the happiness and joy you desire. You will laugh and smile again. You will have fun filled days again. You have the power and control of your happiness. You may bend but you won’t break. You have come this far and endured, you will come out stronger and tougher. Let this be a lesson so in the future you won’t bend as easily and definitely won’t break.

You have the right to say NO!!!!!. You have the right to decline an invitation or offer. Something as simple as “you know I appreciate your offer and kindness of thinking of me, but I’m not in a good space right now so I’ll catch you next time.” Or if someone is asking something of you and its not in your spirit to fulfill, “I appreciate your trust in me but that isn’t something I’m able to do at this time.”

Make yourself a priority, create boundaries, and focus on yourself. Don’t feel bad or guilty about saying “I’m not ok right now and I need to get better.” Taking a step back away from everyone and everything is something we all need to do from time to time.

Take your life and happiness back. Get well soon. Get happier soon. And trust me we all will love the happier YOU.

You are worth it. You deserve it.

RosalynLynn

Be you so you can be free.

Mental Health · Personal Growth · Self care

Don’t Know Where To Begin…Here Are 30 Questions To Ask Yourself

Knowing you want to improve certain areas of your life is half the battle. If you feeling a little stuck, here are 30 questions to get your mind running.

  1. When was the last time I gave myself a compliment?
  2. What is one of the biggest fears that’s holding me back from doing what I want to do?
  3. Am I being the person to others that I want people to be to me?
  4. Am I living the life I want?
  5. Am I putting limits on my life, dreams, hopes and the way I think?
  6. Have I been living life or just existing?
  7. Have the choices I’ve made been with my mind or heart?
  8. Have I been good to myself: my mind, body, and spirit?
  9. What is the one thing that makes me uncomfortable?
  10. When I make a mistake, how do I handle it?
  11. Am I an inspiration to myself and those around me?
  12. What are my biggest accomplishments that I’m most proud of?
  13. What is the one thing I’d like to accomplish this year?
  14. What is the one thing that happen last year that I’d like to continue?
  15. What is the one thing I’d like to change, fix, or get better at?
  16. If I had a magic wand, the one thing in the world I’d like to fix is?
  17. What is my definition of success?
  18. What are the three things I value most?
  19. What is the one thing I’m really good at?
  20. Do I enjoy what I do?
  21. What can I do right now that will have a positive impact on my life?
  22. When was the last time I stepped outside my comfort zone?
  23. What is the one thing I enjoy doing in my free time?
  24. Do I have any hobbies or favorite activities?
  25. If I were completely honest with myself, what is my confidence level on a scale of 1-10?
  26. How do I deal with change?
  27. How do I respond to negative situations or negative people?
  28. What is the one place I’d like to vacation if money wasn’t an object?
  29. Am I a happy person?
  30. Do I like myself?

RosalynLynn

Be you so you can be free.

Healthy Lifestyle · Mental Health · Self care

She Knows

She doesn’t think she’s better than anyone, nor does she think anyone is better than her
She will give you a chance, but if you muck it up you won’t get another
She doesn’t mind being different
She doesn’t mind being alone
She is strong
She knows her own strength
She knows what she wants
She minds her own business
She mourns in silence
She doesn’t have, need, or want a lot of “friends”
She is natural
She is caring
She can keep a sercret
She makes her own decisions and sticks with them
She doesn’t care what others are doing
She loves hard…and hurt hard
She is a gentle lion
She is educated
She’s always thinking, analyzing, and plotting up something new
She isn’t afraid to try something new or step outside her comfort zone
She knows how to balance her life
She doesn’t sweat the small stuff
She is confident
She is comfortable in heels
She is comfortable in sweats
She is proud
She is talented
She’s always switching up her look
She never lets you get too close or comfortable with her
She doesn’t stop once she get started
She is unique
She doesn’t seek advice, she trusts her instinct
She validates herself
She share, give, and love unconditionally
She is unapologetically her
She is woman

RosalynLynn

Be you so you can be free.

Mental Health · Self care · Spiritual Health

Happy Sunday

I just wanted to come to you all really quick and wish you a Happy Sunday morning, noon, or night. I hope you get the peace, relaxation, and joy this day has to offer before the start of the week.

It’s been heavy on me to express to those who are in distress or not, that there’s a reason and purpose for everything even in the toughest of times. Find your purpose for living. Even in the midst of storm my family is in following the death of my mother in law, I can’t help but to have this overwhelming feeling of gratitude.

Blessed Through The Storms

While in the storm we are getting drenched, dirt poured on us, and beat down in the process. Stay present in the moment. Feel every drop of dirt, debris, and rain no matter how bad it hurts. We need the storms to grow and show us the true strength and power we have. My friends anything that is good for us needs dirt and water to grow. Plants, flowers, fruits and vegetables.

If you are sick believe that you are healed. If you are weak believe you are strong. You have been prepared and equipped for every storm. You have everything you need to withstand. At this moment you just have to access it through gratitude 🙏 and having Faith.

Thank you and God Bless.

RosalynLynn

Be you so you can be free.

Healthy Lifestyle · Mental Health · Self care

Random Post…Happy Friday Y’all

We’re 15 days into the new year and it seems it’s been a long one already. There is so much going on around the world, in our homes, and on our jobs that can easily get us into the state of “How in the world did I end up here?”

Right now more than ever taking a moment to ourself is crucial to all of our wellbeing. Even if you can get five minutes in, it’s better than none. Turn the news off, do not consume that all day. Turn off your social media notifications for a day or so. If you feel you can’t turn off your notifications just don’t respond, read, or look at them for a day.

Please be mindful of what you’re consuming and how much. This includes your conversations with family, friends, and coworkers. If you have someone at work like I do, who loves to talk about politics every moment of day, find a way to recenter. For me, I either completely ignore them, turn on my radio really low, and zone out. Eventually when I don’t respond or engage they stop or switch the subject. Another way I deflect is to simply say “I’ve had my fair share of politics I’m really not interested in discussing it right now.” Finally, my last resort, is to literally refer the conversation back work or another subject.

That goes for any subject matter that you are tired of talking about or hearing about.

Another thing that has been heavy on me is to ask yourself what are you condoning, participating, accepting, and accommodating? Right now there are many things that we normalize and gloss over as if its ok, knowing deep down it’s not. Stop twisting yourself into a pretzel, to keep the peace in fear of being left out and talked about.

If it ain’t right, don’t sit well in your spirit, and you don’t want to, then exist gracefully.

I’ve had to come to grips with this subject matter this week. Unfortunately, my mother in law passed away, and me knowing my role on when, where, and how far to extend my support had to become clear to me. I had to step back and say it’s not my mother, my husband has siblings, and I don’t have a say so. I had to tell my husband I’m here, you all let me know what you want and need me to do. I was beginning to struggle on if I was being a good wife, if I didn’t do or be apart of certain situations. But I had to realize my support is to my husband and my children, who lost their grandmother.

Finally, I come to know and understand that I can’t fix people or save people. I can’t and will not break myself down trying to fix someone else. Also if it has nothing to do with you, it doesn’t concern you, it’s none of your business, it doesn’t effect you or your family, it’s out of your control, or you can’t change it, then let it GO. Don’t be mad, angry, upset, bitter, or hold a grudge. Just be done and let go. And don’t look back.

Bet on yourself first, this one time, and give yourself a chance.

RosalynLynn

Be you so you can be free.

Healthy Lifestyle · Mental Health · Self care

Happy New Year!!!!!🎆🎊🎈

WE MADE IT EVERYBODY!!!!!! You really should give yourself a pat on the back. And you thought you weren’t going to make it this year. My friend you are a survivor and you really should be proud of yourself.

Please know you are already equipped with everything you need to begin this new year of 2021. Make yourself a priority, stay positive, and enjoy what’s waiting for you on the other side of 2020.

I want to wish everyone a Happy New Year!!!! Stay safe, stay warm, and be well my friends. See you next year.

Happy New Year

RosalynLynn

Be you so you can be free.

Healthy Lifestyle · Mental Health · Personal Growth · Self care

Dear 2020,

It’s been real. It’s been a drama for sure. You showed us how not to make plans and be too sure about anything. So many of us had plans for you, 2020. It was going to be the year of wealth, health, new businesses , relationships, weddings, milestones, and new beginnings. Obviously you had other plans for us.

I don’t know what your point of all this was, to turn our lives upside down and inside out but you will not WIN!!!!!! We’ve had time to think, meditate, and reflect about what we want and value in life. Can you say hindsight 2020? And we thank you for giving us this time. We thank you for the heart ache, pain, devastation, unknown, and keeping us on the edge of our seats.

You keeping us on the edge of our seats has lit a fire under us. We know family and spending quality time with them is important. We know how important self care is and what we need, to be the best version of ourselves. We’ve found our passions and are ready to put our plans into actions.

We are focused, determined, and ready for you to leave. If you look around and see how excited we were to be in the season of joy, giving, love, and laughter. We began decorating, some of us even earlier than before. We’ve began celebrating and getting in the spirit of new beginnings.

You’ve taught us how to be resilient, patient, and present in the moment. Yes, we were guilty for living in our phones twenty four seven. Yes, we were guilty in believing working until you put yourself in the hospital was a sign of success. Yes, we were guilty in not spending quality time with family and creating memories. But we’re back baby. Better, stronger, wiser, and more ready than ever.

Dear 2020, you came in with a force and hasn’t stopped. As a matter of fact even at the end you are still trying to have a hold on us. But we’ve caught on and we aren’t going to let you ruin this last leg of the race.

Goodbye 👋 2020. You are no longer wanted here. We’ve had enough and ready for 2021, refresh, and new start. Thanks for stopping by and don’t come back!!!!!

RosalynLynn

Be you so you can be free.

Healthy Lifestyle · Personal Relationships · Self care

Last Minute Self Care Gift Ideas

This holiday season it is important to remember the reason for the season. We all want to give and don’t want to leave anyone out. We know there are some who are having a more trying time than we are and giving them a gift that will encourage, inspire, motivate, and lift their spirits is always the best. Due to trying times this year think of giving a gift that keeps on giving.

Self Care Gift Ideas

– Framed Family photo or keep sake.
-Memory book or scrapbook.
-Digital album.
-Personalized Calendar.
-Snack basket of their favorite snacks.
-Coffee mug with their favorite tea or coffee.
-Robe or pajama set
-Favorite dish
-Plant
-Throw
-Create a Self Care Basket
-An Inspiring Book
-Gift Card to a Spa or Salon
-Subscription Service
-Journal Writing Book

This year think about inspiring someone to take a leap of faith and start their self care journey. We can give a gift of 💝 and stay within our budget. These gift ideas you can get at your local stores and mall, since we’re out of time for delivery by Christmas.

RosalynLynn

Be you so you can be free.

Healthy Lifestyle · Mental Health · Self care

Things To Do To Lift Your Spirits This Week

Yes, Christmas 🎄 is Friday and not everyone is happy and in a joyful mood. So my goal is to get as many people inspired as possible. Here are a couple things you can do this week to lift your spirits.

First, my favorite thing to do is drive around in the evening and view the amazing lighting and decorations people have done to their homes. Nothing makes you smile more than seeing the creativity that our neighbors have to make their home bright with cheer.

Just seeing all the lights and decorations lifts the heaviness, makes you smile, and feel good. Even something as simple as people decorating their homes to make others feel good is enough to be grateful for.

Next, along with driving around to view lights and decor, watch some holiday movies that makes you laugh. One of my favorite holiday movies is Home Alone. Because of the kind of year we’re having, there has been an endless amount of movies and marathons on television.

Focus on you for a day. Take a long bath or shower. Do your hair. Do your makeup. Get all dolled up and take selfies in your favorite Christmas pajamas. So when you send out that mass text on Christmas morning, you can personalize it.

Expect to have a great week and holiday. Stop thinking about what you didn’t get to do this holiday season, the presents you couldn’t afford, and what you don’t have. “Things” aren’t important. It’s the intangibles that mean more. Be grateful to be alive to see another Christmas and to just be around loved ones.

Clean your home and make room for new energy, new vibes, and new beginnings. Donate some old stuff you haven’t used in a while. Many of us are off work and have kids on break to help. This makes for great family time while getting things done.

Prepare a meal or dish for family or friends to enjoy. That is a gift in itself.
Volunteer or help someone who is less fortunate than you.

Make ornaments and give them away to your most precious loved ones.

There are so many things you can do this week as we approach Christmas Day to boost your spirits and others in the process. Focus on the good, choose happiness, and stay positive.

Merry Christmas 🎁🎄 Everyone!!!!!!

RosalynLynn

Be you so you can be free.