Mental Note of the Day:

Are You Broken… or Do You Feel Broken?

The other day I was watching a TV show, and a young woman was devastated because her boyfriend was entertaining another girl. She was crying, shaking, barely able to get her words out. Through tears she said, “I’m broken.”

And I found myself holding my breath.

Then the host gently asked her,
“Are you broken… or do you feel broken?”

a woman s hand with a broken heart in paper cutout

Two very different things.

As someone who advocates for mental health, I almost cheered at the screen. Because words matter. The way we label ourselves matters.

“I am broken” becomes identity.
“I feel broken” becomes emotion.

One is temporary.

Life will hand us episodes — heartbreak, disappointment, betrayal, rejection, missed opportunities. In those moments, it can feel like we’ve shattered into pieces. And feelings are real. They deserve acknowledgment. But feelings are not facts. Don’t Let a Bad Moment Ruin Your Day

You can feel broken without being broken.

You can feel devastated without being destroyed.

You can feel rejected without being unworthy.

So often we take a moment and turn it into a life sentence. We experience one painful chapter and decide the whole story is ruined. But if you look back over your own life, you’ll see something powerful: you’ve felt broken before… and yet here you are.

Still standing.
Still loving.
Still trying.
Still healing.

Every episode that felt like it would take you out somehow shaped you instead.

It’s okay to say, “I feel hurt.”
It’s healthy to say, “I feel disappointed.”
It’s honest to say, “I feel angry about how this turned out.”

But be careful about declaring yourself broken.

Broken suggests there is no repair.
Broken suggests finality.
Broken suggests you are beyond restoration.

And that simply isn’t true.

You are a human being navigating life in real time. You are allowed to grieve what didn’t work out. You are allowed to cry over the relationship that ended. You are allowed to be mad at the situation that didn’t go your way.

But your life is not over because something didn’t work.

This is just an episode — not the entire series.

Let this be your reminder today:
Say what you actually feel.

Instead of “I’m broken,” try:
“I feel hurt right now.”
“I feel disappointed.”
“I feel shaken.”
“I feel unsure.”

Feelings pass.
Identity stays.

And you, my friend, are not broken.

You are healing.

RosalynLynn

Be you so you can be free.

Getting Out of the Fog: Back to the Basics That Actually Help

When depression creeps in, everything starts to feel complicated. Heavy. Loud. Overstimulating. And the internet doesn’t help.

Right now, everything is trying to sell us something — a better body, a better routine, a better mindset, a better life. Live here. Do this. Eat this. Buy this. Monetize everything.

But when you’re depressed, none of that is real life.

What is real life — and what actually helps — are the basics.
They’re old. They’re boring. And they work.

This isn’t about fixing everything at once.
It’s about doing small, repeatable things that slowly bring your nervous system back to center. HEALING THROUGH PAIN: THE PAIN IS TEMPORARY

photo of scrabble tiles forming the word depression

Here’s where I always start.

1. Eat Something. Drink Water. Start There.

When you’re depressed, eating feels like a chore. Drinking water feels optional. But your body can’t heal what it doesn’t have fuel for.

You don’t need a perfect diet.
You need something consistent.

Eat real food when you can
Drink water throughout the day
Don’t shame yourself for what’s easy

This is care, not control.

Affirmation:
Taking care of my body is an act of compassion.

Journal Prompt:
What is one simple thing I can eat or drink today that supports my body?

2. Get Fresh Air. Touch Grass. Move Gently.

You don’t need intense workouts.
You don’t need motivation.

You need movement that reminds your body you’re alive.

Step outside
Feel the sun or the breeze
Touch the ground
Take a short walk

Even five minutes counts.

Affirmation:
Gentle movement is enough today.

Journal Prompt:
How does my body feel after spending a few minutes outside?

3. Do Something That Uses Your Mind — Gently

Depression often leaves your thoughts stuck in loops. Giving your brain something neutral to focus on can interrupt that spiral.

Puzzles
Crosswords
Word searches
Coloring
Simple games

These aren’t distractions — they’re grounding tools.

Affirmation:
I am allowed to engage my mind without pressure.

Journal Prompt:
What activities help quiet my thoughts, even a little?

4. Rest Is Not Optional — It’s Treatment

Sleep doesn’t always come easily when you’re depressed, but creating a rhythm matters.

Each night:

Set a cutoff time
Turn off the noise
Shower or bathe
Reset your space
Read for leisure

Let your body know the day is over.

Affirmation:
Rest is part of my healing.

Journal Prompt:
What helps me feel most calm before bed?

5. Take 5-Minute Resets — Even at Work

You don’t have to wait for the perfect moment to breathe.

Take five minutes every hour if you can
Step away
Sit in a bathroom stall
Close your eyes
Breathe slowly

This isn’t weakness.
This is regulation.

Affirmation:
I am allowed to pause.

Journal Prompt:
Where in my day can I build in small moments of rest?

6. Clean Your Space — Gently but Intentionally

Depression and clutter feed each other.

You don’t need to deep clean your whole home in one day. Start small.

One surface
One room
One task

A clearer space often brings a clearer mind.

Affirmation:
My environment can support my healing.

Journal Prompt:
What small area can I reset today to feel lighter?

7. Reduce Social Media — Protect Your Mind

Right now, everything online is telling you:

You’re not doing enough
You’re not living right
You need to buy, fix, hustle, optimize

That isn’t real life.

Depression needs less comparison, not more.

Reduce scrolling
Take breaks
Curate your feed
Choose presence over noise

Affirmation:
I don’t need to consume everything to be okay.

Journal Prompt:
How does social media affect my mood, and what boundaries feel supportive right now?

A Final Reminder

These basics won’t cure depression overnight.
But they create stability.
They give your body and mind something solid to stand on.

You don’t need to do all of this perfectly.
You don’t need to do all of it at once.

Start where you are.
Choose one thing.
Build from there.

Healing isn’t dramatic.
It’s quiet.
It’s repetitive.
And it’s deeply personal.

🌿 Gentle Closing Affirmation

I am allowed to heal slowly.
I am allowed to keep things simple.
I am allowed to choose what supports me.

RosalynLynn

Be you so you can be free.

It’s Okay to Not Have Anything to Say: Embracing the Power of Silence

I wrote this post a while back and never hit publish. Reading it again reminded me why I started writing about self-care in the first place — so here it is, finally seeing the light of day.

In a world that often values constant communication and rapid responses, it’s easy to feel pressured to always have something to say. Whether it’s in conversations, group settings, or responding to texts and emails, there’s an unspoken expectation that silence is something to be filled. But here’s a truth that I’ve come to embrace: it’s perfectly okay to not have anything to say.

Silence Is Comforting

I’m someone who’s comfortable with silence. I can sit in a room with others and not feel the need to contribute to the conversation. I find peace in those quiet moments, allowing myself to listen and simply be present. While some people might feel uneasy with silence, seeing it as an awkward void that needs to be filled with words, I see it as a natural and valuable part of communication.

There are times when I receive a text or email and don’t have an immediate response. It’s not that I don’t care or that I’m ignoring the person; it’s just that I genuinely don’t have anything to add at that moment. I’ve learned to be comfortable with this and to recognize that not every message needs an immediate or profound response. Sometimes, it’s better to take a moment, reflect, or even let the conversation be for a while. MENTAL NOTE OF THE DAY

Embracing Silence in Conversations

We live in a culture that often equates silence with awkwardness or discomfort, leading many to speak just to fill the space. But silence can be powerful—it allows for deeper listening, reflection, and connection. When you’re not constantly thinking about what to say next, you can truly hear what the other person is saying, absorbing their words and emotions without the distraction of formulating your own response.

There’s a certain strength in being okay with not always having something to say. It shows confidence in who you are and comfort in the present moment. It’s a recognition that not every interaction requires input, and that sometimes, just being there is enough.

It’s Okay to Just Listen

Listening is an underrated skill. In a conversation, being a good listener can be more valuable than contributing a quick or thoughtless comment. Listening shows that you respect the other person’s perspective, and it allows you to learn and grow from what they have to share.

It’s also okay to take a step back and admit that you don’t have anything to add. Conversations don’t always need to be a back-and-forth exchange of ideas; sometimes, they can be a shared experience of simply being together, enjoying the silence, or listening without feeling the pressure to respond.

In the words of Judge Judy, “Put your listening ears on. God gave us two eyes, two ears, and one mouth for a reason.”

Silence isn’t a sign of disinterest or disengagement. It’s a natural part of communication that allows us to process our thoughts, reflect on what’s been said, and approach the conversation with more clarity and intention. Embracing silence can lead to more meaningful interactions and a deeper understanding of both yourself and others.

So, if you ever find yourself in a situation where you don’t have anything to say, remember that it’s perfectly okay. It’s okay to be comfortable in silence, to listen without responding, and to give yourself the space to simply be.

In a world that often values constant chatter, remember that silence has its own power. It’s okay to not have anything to say or to want to say. Whether in conversations, texts, or emails, embracing the comfort of silence can lead to richer, more thoughtful interactions. So, let’s take a moment to appreciate the quiet, the pauses, and the times when just being present is more than enough.

RosalynLynn

Be you so you can be free.

✨Let That Sink In: A Self-Awareness Check-In That’s Not a To-Do List

In a world that glorifies productivity, it’s easy to get swept up in doing and forget about being. We’re constantly fed messages to grind, hustle, push, and do more. But when’s the last time you just sat still? I’m not here to tell you what to do—I’m here to offer a pause, a mirror, and maybe a shift in how you check in with yourself. 7 SELF REFLECTION JOURNAL PROMPTS

Below are a few questions—call them “mind stretchers” or internal nudges. They’re not meant to be answered out loud, written in a journal, or added to a list (unless you want to). They’re here to plant seeds, provoke reflection, and help you quietly recognize what may need attention in your life.

🧠 Food for Thought:

When was the last time you sat for 5 minutes—no phone, no noise, no scrolling—just sat?
Have you ever allowed yourself to sit in the sun and do nothing but let your mind wander freely?
When’s the last time you did something alone… and truly enjoyed your own company?
Do your playlists match your moods—joy, sorrow, grind mode, wind-down, pure silence?
When did you last block or mute someone—for peace, not punishment?
Have you deep-cleaned a space not for the task itself, but to reclaim your energy in it?
How long has it been since you had a full “phone pause”? Not airplane mode—just away.
Have you gotten dressed up lately for no one but yourself?
When’s the last time you took a nap or did nothing… without the guilt whispering in your ear?
Do you make your bed each morning—or is it one of those rituals that would ground you if you did?
What’s one thing on your list you could remove today—and not replace with anything?
Have you ever decluttered your phone—not just storage, but energy? (Delete. Mute. Archive.)

These moments aren’t about perfection or performance. They’re about internal honesty. They are where healing begins—not through loud transformation but quiet noticing. Sometimes, the most profound reset is not in doing more, but in doing less, more intentionally.

You don’t need a retreat or a $50 planner to do your internal work. You just need moments like this to listen in. To yourself. To your needs. To your peace.

Simple Reflection Exercise:

Choose one of the thoughts above that made you pause. Don’t overthink it—just pick the one that tugged at you. Then, do something small around it. Maybe you mute that chat. Maybe you sit in silence. Maybe you dress up to vacuum the house. You’ll be surprised how different “self-work” feels when it’s led by quiet intention instead of guilt.

Which of these made you stop and think? Take that moment just for yourself. No pressure. Just presence. 🌿

RosalynLynn

Be you so you can be free.

END OF YEAR TIP: ENHANCE PERSONAL GROWTH WITH PRIVACY

We live in a fast paced digital world where sharing every aspect of our lives have become the norm. However, there is an immense power in keeping your life private. Protecting your mental health and emotional wellbeing while being intentional can lead to your personal growth on levels you couldn’t possibly imagine.

Boundaries and seeking validation from others can be exhausting and draining to ones mental health. I had to learn the hard way that even sharing something as profound as a promotion will lead to others counting your money and making assumptions about you. Setting boundaries and keeping certain things private allowed me to focus on my happiness and success without worrying about the opinions of others.

Another thing I noticed about keeping certain things private or only sharing certain things is I get to have some control over my narrative. I told my mom on Christmas Day, if someone says something about me it is completely made up because I don’t share anything. Therefore, if someone says anything your feelings won’t be hurt because you know they pulled it out of thin air.

”Solitude sometimes is best society.”-John Milton

Not sharing your personal business keeps your from looking at what others are doing. Which we all know getting caught up in the comparison validation is detrimental to our mental and emotional well being. One of my good friends recommended “I Hope You Fail: Ten Hater Statements Holding You Back From Getting Everything You Want.” https://amzn.to/3vkJLpB Please read this book if you’re needing more advice on how to stay productive and private.

As the new year approaches do some reflections to see if you need to pull the curtain back on some things. Are there any areas where you feel you need to set some boundaries. Always start small and build as your confidence builds. Once you begin to see personal growth, self esteem, and self improvement you’ll have the motivation to continue pressing on. FRIENDLY REMINDERS I TELL MYSELF

Lastly, being private isn’t about being secretive or keeping secrets. But about protecting your peace, energy, and mind. Setting boundaries and embracing privacy helps us create a safe space for ourselves and others around us. Happy New Year!!!

RosalynLynn

Be you so you can be free.

THIS IS WHAT FAITH, HOPE, AND BELIEF LOOKS LIKE

As I’ve progressed in my self awareness journey I’ve mastered the skill of being present in the moment and able to receive the messages as they come. If I ever have to question what faith, hope, and belief look like I witnessed it first hand. And more importantly there was action behind the belief.

As I sit and listen to her answer the question “So how is your mom doing?”, her voice doesn’t quiver. She doesn’t hesitate to say “it’s not the absolute worst nor is it better.” She confessed her mother had several mini strokes which led to her dementia. Then she delivered what faith, hope, and belief looks like: She said, “My hope is that mom has a final stroke and she goes in her sleep.”

Now on the surface you would clutch your pearls. But when you believe and have faith, you know living with a loved one who has no quality of life, has pain around the clock, loss of appetite, loss of movement in limbs, lack of awareness of themselves and loved ones, that isn’t the life you’d hope for for them. Yes, we want them around but at some point it becomes selfish. In result, whenever they do transition, we are left with the pain of what their last days reflected. MENTAL NOTE OF THE DAY

As she describes the emotional and physical toll it takes to care for her aging mother that has dementia, she’s still very self aware of her own needs. She told her mom, I have to go out and see people. She refuses to give up her life. Her hobbies, craft and book club weekly meetings. As well as church.

As she was speaking I could’t help but reflect on the countless family members and friends that gave up their life taking care of their loved one. After my grandma transitioned, all the arrangements and services were done, my mom sat at the table and said, “I don’t know what to do everyday.” Why? Because for months she gave up her entire being to take care of grandma.

Even in the midst of grief, her ability to have self awareness, emotional wellness, and boundaries inspired me to continue. We’re going to experience some raw emotions and experiences, but all the while it’s still priority to put ourselves first. No matter what the situation is, we are left with ourselves to move on.

Have faith, hope, and belief. Believe you have the power and strength to do all things and over come all things. Just because you’re having a hiccup doesn’t mean to lack self care. If anything, ramp it up.

RosalynLynn

Be you so you can be free.

HE WASN’T MAD AT ME

After 30 minutes of crying my eyes out and going for a walk, I realized he wasn’t mad at me. One day my brother called me and immediately from hello, I knew he was heated. Now, I’m still being my normal self because in my mind I know it’s not towards me or about me. “Did you know auntie moved to Vegas?” I answered, yes. Well what do I get for being honest.

He yelled, cursed, and went on a tangent about how he’s always the last to know anything. The family only calls him when they want or need something. I’m stunned and confused because it had been more than a week or so that she moved. She told me she was going to call everyone with her new address and information. So I’m thinking to myself, she hasn’t gotten around to it. My aunt had this grand plan to tell everyone because she was hosting Thanksgiving this year.

Well after about 2 attempts of me trying to get a word in, he said “I see how y’all are, if that’s how you want to be, fine!!” He hung up on me. I looked at my husband and we both were confused. Immediately I burst into tears, ran upstairs, put on my walking clothes, grabbed my earbuds and went out for a walk. My husband was trying to catch me but I just had to go. My brother and I have always been close, never had arguments or disagreements, always one another confidant, and I just couldn’t believe he spoke to me the way he did. GROWTH TIP: YOU CAN LEARN FROM ANYONE

Now the old me kicked in for a minute and instantly said I’m not calling him, I’m not answering his calls, and he has done it for himself. But then after 30 minutes it clicked, he wasn’t mad at me. Thank God for journaling, prayer, meditation, and inner healing. Here’s what I figured out:

He was mad at my aunt but couldn’t express that due to ego, hurt, and lack of understanding. Now my aunt and him were like two peas in a pot. They had the best relationship. He was upset because he felt like they had an unbreakable bond and he wasn’t the first person she told. Every time I tried to encourage him to think about it in another perspective, he shot me down.
Which leads me to, when someone has something already made up in their mind there is no way to get them to think about things differently. Especially if they haven’t done internal work to understand their triggers, misunderstandings, and communication.
This is exactly what they mean when they say, don’t take things personally. It had nothing to do with me. He was upset with her and I was the one who answered the phone. My brother is a self admitted people pleaser, he doesn’t like when people think negative of him, and my aunt is the one who was able to get to him. So he felt betrayal probably.
For me, it’s a reminder that you have to remain emotionally sound to ensure you don’t damage yourself, others, and relationships. If I would have reacted and matched his emotions, tone, and demeanor it would have took a turn that would have been difficult to come back from. In the very beginning of the call I was able to recognize he just wanted to get out what he made up in his head and a response wasn’t wanted, needed, or required.
Don’t let others anger, feelings, and misunderstandings change you or how you feel. Be who you are and when there is an opportunity for encouragement and inspiration then give it. It will be received and comprehended when it’s settled.

I had to look back at this exchange and say I’m proud of myself. This allowed me to answer the phone when he called me again, have a conversation, and continue to be brother and sister. The cherry on top was, I told my husband I don’t want or need an apology. I’m ok. I just want him to get to a point where he doesn’t have to people please and prove himself. What he doesn’t realize is, it was more of a reminder for me to continue to do the work.

RosalynLynn

Be you so you can be free.

IT’S THE FIRST OF THE YEAR

Well, for me it’s the first of the year. Today is my birthday and I’ve always used my birthday as my “reset” day, beginning day, or milestone day. Every since I was a teenager I’ve always viewed my birthday as a deadline date to do something or start something . I never wanted a big party or extravagant gifts. For me, I’d wake up and make a goal about what I wanted personally for myself by the my next birthday.

A couple years ago, I turned 40 and that was my big day to cut my hair. I set goals on how I wanted to feel, where I wanted to be mentally, emotionally. My birthday is my first of the year. I love spending the day being me. Isn’t that’s what it’s for? To be in peace and completely me. My plan for the day is to wake up, get myself all dolled up, light my new candle, and sit outside and drink my coffee in one of my favorite mugs.

The simple things and the simple life is what I enjoy. I’ve learned to let things go. Let them be what they are. Not worry about what they could have been or what I hoped for. Time is very precious. I know it’s a cliche, but really it is. Just look it’s the middle of August. If I want to do something, buy somethings, go somewhere, eat something, then I’m going to do it. I understand the purpose of living each day. I won’t get them back.

”Sometimes you need to take a break from everyone and spend time alone, to experience, appreciate, and love yourself.”- Robert Tew

One of my goals was to be more self aware and emotionally strong. Not take things personally. Be confident in myself. Give myself without depleting me. Being honest in my communication. Standing on my boundaries without being dismissive. Not feeling like I have to explain myself. Being knowledgeable, comfortable, and confident in my decisions. Not seeking validation or approval to live or just be me.

I enjoy my birthday. I own my birthday. It’s the first of the year for me. My goal is to continue my quest of emotional intelligence. Using my path and journey to pour into family, friends, and my children. I feel great and grateful for the mental clarity that God gives me. I like me. I love who I am becoming and hope it’s infectious.

My hope for you is to find your own way of feeling free. Whatever that may look like for you. How do you reset, reflect, and recharge? Do you use January 1 or your birthday like I do? Or some other day?

Be well!!!!

RosalynLynn

Be you so you can be free.

IT’S OK, TO BE OK WITH SOME THINGS

This weekend having a conversation with my aunt about this thing called life, made some uncomfortable “things” come up. By the end, I told her sometimes you just have to be ok with some things. It doesn’t make it bad. It doesn’t make it wrong. IT’S OK TO NOT HAVE ALL THE ANSWERS Just being ok, accepting, and releasing gives you the opportunity to grow, heal, and be at peace. Here are some things we just sometimes have to be ok with.

It’s Ok…

-To not want to be ok
-To not feel ok
-To feel lonely
-Needing or wanting someone around, or companionship
-Not knowing what you want to do
-If your feelings are hurt
-To feel more than one emotion or one way
-To lose interest
-Want something different
-To seek a different perspective than the normal
-To have thoughts of giving up or quitting
-Gain a few pounds
-Have a setback of any kind (diet, fitness, finances, emotions)
-If something or someone isn’t what you expected

”Don’t be hard on yourself. It’s okay to have a moment of uncertainty about life. It’s a transformative period to find your purpose.”

Those are just a few things that came up in our conversation. No matter how old you are or what you’re doing it’s ok. Sometimes we won’t have all the answers or information. We even may not ever get any or all of it. The only thing we can do is do the best we can with what we have. Everything will work out. In many circumstances it’s better to not know all the answers.

RosalynLynn

Be you so you can be free.

LIFE IS GOING TO LIFE

I had to take a little break. Rethink some things. Reset my expectations. I NEED TO RESET MY EXPECTATIONS Basically allowed life to life. I found myself on auto pilot. Just going like a hamster on a wheel. This new position isn’t what I expected, hoped for, or really enjoying for me. So I’ve been doing a lot to give it my all and give it a chance. In doing so, it has caused me to miss time on other hobbies and interest of mine.

blackboard with your life matters inscription on black background

First I made it a point to be intentional about everything I did in a day. One day I looked back and realized by 9a.m. I’m on my third load of laundry. Some will say that’s great. You’re being productive. Yes, I enjoy being a mom and wife. But I’m so much more than that. Which lead me to question can I really have both, a career and family. But I’ll save that for a later post.

While doing laundry, I was also cooking breakfast, rotating the dishes from the dishwasher, straightening the living room, drinking my protein shake, checking the to do list for the day, and getting everyone out the house on time. Sounds good right. Sort of. I became so good at multitasking many things and wearing many hats, by the time I sat at my desk to work my mind was already like “girl give me a moment.”

So now I literally do one thing at a time. I get myself together and come downstairs. Have a moment and drink my protein shake while taking my medicine. Then I’d cook breakfast for the kids. While cooking breakfast I’ll listen to Joel Osteen for some encouragement. After breakfast then I’ll clean up and do any dishes that needs to be done.

Next, I focus on laundry. Make sure the laundry is separated and ready to go. In between time, giving myself permission to sit for a few minutes before drop off. Just taking a moment to breath and just be.

Before work I was also doing too many things. I would finalize and complete any contracts from my freelancing hobby. Manage and list any new items on Poshmark. Respond to messages. Plus try to take notes, edit, and draft a blog post. I had to stop that. Now I schedule time for each. Instead, after drop off, I sit in front of the window enjoying my coffee and the sun or rain if it’s raining.

Lastly, before turning on my computer I would journal for 10 minutes to calm and relax my mind. Me being intentional about everything I do has helped me calm myself. Not feel guilty for wanting to take a break or multi tasking. So often we get multitasking and being productive confused. You can complete one thing at a time and still be productive. As a matter of fact, you’d be more productive.

Even in my evening and night routine I ensure I’m being intentional. I no longer try to cook, fold clothes, clean, watch tv, and then workout. I give myself grace and permission.

If you are struggling to focus. Sleep. Aren’t happy. Feel like you’re on auto pilot. Stressed. Jumpy. Anxious. Empty inside. Numb. Take a step back, evaluate your day and what you’re doing in a day and how much you are doing. Take the cape off. We are human beings not machines. Give yourself permission to slow down. Throughly go through one task. Learn and grow.

You know the eye opener for me was my daughter. My husband and I sat back one day and watched her routine. When they get home from school they’re always hungry. So I try to have something ready or almost ready to eat. One particular day we noticed the plate was on the counter a little longer. We again let her know her plate was ready.

Well she was changing her clothes. My daughter everyday gets out her school clothes. Take her jewelry off and place in the jewelry box in the spaces they belong. Pull her hair out of her face. Freshen up in the bathroom. Then come downstairs and get her plate. Honey she unwinds. I took note.

My night routine I truly enjoy and unwind the day. I have a cut off time for everything. Whatever didn’t get done by that cut off time, oh well. It can wait. I unwind to ensure my mind is clear and my heart is light.

Life is going to life. If you don’t slow down and be intentional it will pass you by. Finding yourself unhappy and unfulfilled.

Are you living intentionally?

RosalynLynn

Be you so you can be free.