6 TIPS FOR MONDAY MORNING BLUES

The alarm clock goes off and you instantly get into a mood. The only thing you can think about is what you have to do at work, the coworker that gets on your last nerve, what’s for dinner, and the bills that are due today. You have no energy to get out of bed nor do you have any enthusiasm.

woman in black shirt sitting on white chair

We’ve all had these mornings, probably once twice. The truth is we can’t stop these kind of mornings, however we can do minor things to get us through.

  1. Immediately stop any negative talk or thoughts. Instead, remind yourself of why you took the job or position in the first place. What excitement did you have when you first started? That co worker that gets on your nerves is telling you there is something about you, that they hoped to have. You inspire them. YOU INSPIRE SOMEONE OUT THERE Dinner is hours away, you will have a meal on table.
  2. Stretch. Just about 5 minutes of stretching from head to toe. Wake up your joints, bones, and get that blood circulating. You’ll feel loose and ready to move.
  3. Take a shower, wash your hair, and face. Release all the negative into the drain and renew your spirit. Put some time into yourself. Make yourself feel good and look good.
  4. Put something good in your belly. Have a good fulfilling breakfast. Breakfast is not only good for your physical body, but your brain and emotional wellbeing as well.
  5. Before heading out for your day, take a moment to pray. Gratitude for the vehicle to get to work, the job itself, the home and bed you just woke up in, that nutritional breakfast, and simply waking up. There is someone out there who went to sleep last night and didn’t wake up.
  6. Lastly go have a good day. Expect goodness throughout the day. When we expect goodness and have hope, our thoughts will remain positive. By the evening you’ll forget you even woke up on the wrong side of the bed.

Monday morning blues will come and they will go. But be intentional and practice small habits that will boost your mood. Certain things will always be out of our control. What we can control is what we think about the situation, how we respond, and get through. Remember good times don’t last but tough people do. This is temporary.

Have a great day!!!!

RosalynLynn

Be you so you can be free.

GIVE UP THE FIGHT

Whatever fight you’re having, give it up. Give up the fight and free yourself. Constantly being in a battle or ready to battle is killing your soul and spirit. Not giving up the fight is hindering you from living and being free.

Give up the fight you’re having with yourself. The fight that’s in your head. Tell yourself you throw in the white flag and you’re done fighting. You too tired to do anything else because you’re always on defense and ready to fight.

Give up the fight with your spouse, friend, family, coworker, and money. The energy you’re exhausting to stay in the battle could be used to communicate, understand, and love. Instead, create new opportunities. Fight to open that new business. Fight to save for that new house. What are you even fighting for. To be right? To be heard? Vent your frustrations? All those reasons are valid. However, understand your feelings are valid. You don’t need anyone’s permission to feel how you feel.

At what point do you say I’m going to seek resolution or or be apart of the resolution? Going around in circles is making you dizzy. Let it go. MENTAL AND EMOTIONAL HEALTH: 3 THINGS YOU CAN CONTROL

Do you even know what you’re fighting for? Sometimes we can be in a battle for so long that we forget what we were mad about. You can definitely get your point across, vent your feelings, and stand up for yourself without raising your blood pressure. We can eliminate stress by fighting smart. Pause and take a break. Don’t let your emotions take over.

It’s time to let go. free yourself of the bricks on your shoulders. It’s too heavy to carry. It doesn’t mean you have to forget. Adapt, adjust, and move on. Stop letting the same things continuously hurt you over and over. If you’ve been repeating the same argument they are going to believe and feel what they want.

As we approach summer and the second half of this year, make a decision to not fight anymore. It doesn’t matter what kind of fight you’re having, seek some resolutions. You absolutely can demand your respect without being in fight. Think light, think positive, and think of being free.

Be well on your journey.

RosalynLynn

Be you so you can be free.

WHEN EXPRESSING YOUR EMOTIONS, BE HONEST

Say what you mean and mean what you say. We’ve heard it a million times, but being honest about how we feel and expressing our emotions saves us from heartache. Many times we are afraid to express how we feel out of shame, guilt, or embarrassment. When in actuality, how you feel and your emotions are perfect the way they come.

Ironically this week, I’ve had conversation with two different women about this same topic in different scenarios. On one hand, Lady X puts up this harsh exterior and wall in an attempt to show she’s not ”weak”. She so desperately want her relationship to go to the next level, but is afraid to say that’s what she wants. Lady X can’t even admit she wants, yearns, and needs love and affection. In many of our conversations that is repeated ”I don’t like weak people.” Finally I stopped her and said, “it’s not that people are weak, they are willing to be vulnerable and express how they truly feel.”

Next, I told her, you’ve expressed to him you don’t want anything and he can’t do anything for you, when in actuality you do want a relationship. I said, be honest with your emotions and how you feel. Express what you truly want and desire. Everyone has needs and wants emotionally, you’re no different. At last, she confesses. SELF LOVE: BELIEVE IN YOURSELF

”We destroy ourselves when we stop feeling. If you bury your feelings within you, you become a graveyard.”-Bernie S. Siegel

Now on to Lady Y. She’s upset because her ex-husband has passed away and feels left out of the plans for the final resting place. After she expressed how disrespected she felt and anger, I kindly reminded her of the instructions she gave when they divorced. She clearly made it known she didn’t want to talk about him, know anything about him, and dissolved mutual relationships. I said, if I recall, you made it very clear about your feelings. Yes, it’s your ex, but you expressed forcefully your boundaries. Now that they are being respected, it hurts your feelings.

Again, I had to explain, whatever your honest feelings are, say it. If you want people to genuinely love, care, and have concern you have to be honest with yourself first and then others about your feelings. You can’t trick people into reading your mind, or expect them to already know.

Sometimes we find ourselves getting frustrated because our emotional needs aren’t being met. Ask yourself, ”am I being honest about how I’m feeling?” Then go from there. In order to heal, grow, love, and be loved, we have to acknowledge to ourselves first and then express to others our true feelings.

Be well on your journey.

RosalynLynn

Be you so you can be free.

WHICH SELF CARE CATEGORIES ARE YOU DOING WELL IN?

Physical self care and emotional self care I am doing well in. No one is ever a 100% all the time. However, maintaining balance in my physical and emotional health helps me manage all other areas of self care. In actuality, all the self care categories are related.

Without question my physical activity is the center prong of my self care. When I’m feeling sad, angry, or overwhelmed I turn to walking. Even when I’m excited or received good news, walking calms me. You know when you get those jitters and you don’t know what to do, walking brings me back down. walking is my meditation. When I walk I can sort my thoughts, answer questions, and regain focus. The best part is doing so without judgement or input from others. It allows me to literally and figuratively cleanse the negative energy.

Another form of physical activity that helps with managing my self care is cleaning. When I get in a mood, I put in my ear buds and get lost in cleaning products. This is a form of therapy for me. From top to bottom and front to back I do a physical cleanse as well as a mental while cleaning. It’s almost like disinfecting the negative energy, thoughts, and emotions away. After cleaning I always take a long shower or bath. In result I feel like I’ve had a therapy session with an actual counselor.

Yes, I reap benefits physically keeping my body in shape. But now, I more so do physical activity to keep my mind clear and focused. Whenever you are feeling over whelmed, too many negative thoughts, or in a state of confusion, do some kind of physical activity. Physical self care or activities gives you a moment to turn your attention to something else. By the time you’re done you’ll have the strength and courage to move forward. HOLDING THAT GRUDGE IS ONLY HURTING YOU, LET IT GO

My second self care category I’m doing well at is emotional. Keeping my emotional health in check helps me communicate my needs and wants. Allows me to give myself permission to be happy and doing so guilt free. Not being to quick to respond. Not taking things personally. Being grateful in good and bad times. Allowing myself to have a moment. Acknowledging I am having a moment. Then tackling what caused me to have a moment.

Also part of my emotional health is giving myself a break. Saying I need time off. Lastly a huge part of my emotional health is positive self talk and journaling. Writing is very cathartic. Getting out your feelings and emotions is important to your overall health. Good and bad. All in turn has allowed me to even keep my mental health in balance. I realized leading with emotion or making emotional decisions can make situations worse.

What self care category or categories are you doing well in? We are so quick to point out areas we need to work on. Exercise some good emotional habits and point out what you are doing good in.

Have a great day!!!!!!!

RosalynLynn

Be you so you can be free.

KEY TO HAPPINESS: DO WHATEVER YOU WANT TO DO

”Happiness is a journey, not a destination.”-Buddha

There are several keys to happiness. Do whatever you want to do. Whenever someone asks me where do I begin, I literally tell them to do whatever it is you want to do or been dying to do. For some of us, this step is difficult and often skipped over.

lemon photo on person s thigh

The key to being happy and not feeling weighed down is living the life you want to live not how others think you should live. We all have received unsolicited advice, opinions, and directions as to what someone else think we should do.

I know many people who’ve been criticized for not working in the field they received their college degree in. What’s it to them? Especially if they aren’t paying your bills, feeding your children, and you don’t work for them.

How many times have you been subjected to criticism because you wanted to change careers, go back to school, or move away. From experience, I moved out of state, and my family feels like I abandoned them, and left the family. Therefore, that is why I’m often treated like an outcast. Did it hurt me when they told me that, absolutely. But I quickly reminded myself the vision I have for my life and my children’s life going forward. MENTAL HEALTH REMINDER: OPINIONS DON’T DEFINE YOU

The key to being happy in doing what you want to do, is knowing you are doing it for you. You can’t live your life for others. Whether you do it or not, someone is always going to have something to say. As my mother used to tell me when I was younger, “you’re doing something right cause you are on their mind.”

So wouldn’t you rather live happily doing what you want to do instead of being unhappy doing what others think you should be doing? Furthermore, what do you have to lose? If you lose relationships because you choose to live your life, then those relationships wasn’t as solid as you thought. Ok, if you start a new business venture and lose money, that will sour things a bit, but God will always provide and provide another opportunity.

One of my first keys to happiness is doing what you want to do. Most often we are unhappy because we are settling. We’ve boxed ourselves into a position to make others feel comfortable and because ”this is what society says you should be doing”, or this is how it’s always been.

If you are struggling, confused, and feel cornered, push your way out by making decisions to do what you want to do. You don’t just have to be one thing. I love doing many things, yes my college degree is in business Administration. But I’m a certified medical billing coder, licensed insurance agent, freelancer, and other things. You have every right to connect to every part of who you are.

Be well on your journey.

RosalynLynn

Be you so you can be free.

HOW DO YOU LOVE YOURSELF

Happy Valentines Day!!!!!! How do you love yourself today or any other day? Right now is the best time to show yourself some love before you shower others with love. Make sure your self love cup is filled first. Then let the over flow of love spill over to others in your life.

”If you can’t love yourself, how in the hell are you going to love somebody else. Can I get a amen up in here?” -Rupaul

multicolor heart shaped candies

How are you going to love yourself today? If you are single, married, widowed, or going through a separation you are loved. Therefore, you should celebrate that. Even if you feel right now, you are alone or lonely, there is someone out there that admires you. For those that are married or in a relationship, don’t forget about yourself. So often those that aren’t single tend to forget about themselves in a relationship. Make yourself a priority today as well. SELF LOVE: BELIEVE IN YOURSELF

I’m Going To Love Myself Today By:

-Glamming myself up before I go to work. I painted my nails red and have a special red lipstick for this day.
-Eating a healthy breakfast to start my day off right.
-Editing a blog post because it’s my hobby and something l like to do for me.
-Tidy up my home to ensure my space is free for me to be comfortable.
-Pray to make sure my spirit is filled and I don’t let any negativity stick to me.
-Workout to increase my overall health and wellness.
-Laugh because it’s good for the soul and it’s the best medicine.
-Tell myself I’m enough and I deserve everything my heart desire.
-Fix dinner for my family because I love being a mom and a wife.

Those are just a few things I will do today to show myself some love. I encourage everyone out there to show themselves some love. Whatever it is you want, feel you are missing, or need give it to yourself. Then you may spread the love around.

Be well on your journey.

RosalynLynn

Be you so you can be free.

WHAT DEPRESSION LOOKS LIKE…

I’ve read many stories and watched many videos on individuals trying to explain their encounters of people questioning if they are really depressed. There are many misconceptions on what depression looks and feel like.

I was reading a comment, forgive me I can’t remember which site, but she caught an Uber ride home. The driver naturally sparked a conversation and asked her about her day. She explained to him she was leaving her appointment with her therapist because she’s battling depression. His response was, ”you don’t look depressed.”

Of course, she felt the need to explain why she doesn’t look depressed. Furthermore, proceeded to briefly explain to him not everyone carry’s their depression on the outside.

That lead me to thinking. There are many people walking around dealing with depression and life and we have no clue. depression isn’t always ugly, sleeping all day, crying, not eating, and withdrawn.

depression Can Also Look Like:

The car pool mom that’s always smiling wishing the kids a great day and cheering them on, on the way to school.

That single mother working two jobs, making it look easy, and doing it with hair, nails, and makeup done.

That office worker who make sure the company doesn’t miss a beat. The go to person in the office that make sure everyone is ok.

That coach or teacher coming to school everyday giving all they have to ensure our kids has the best education and chance possible.

That waiter or waitress who is always smiling and looks happy to be at work serving your favorite dish.

The bus driver greeting you on the bus every morning, afternoon, or evening.

The kid that is the star athlete at their school.

The kid who has a 4.0 and makes it look effortless.

That stay at home mom that everyone wish they can have the life of.

And a million others out there, doing an amazing job hiding their depression.

The point is, just because someone isn’t crying, doesn’t mean they aren’t having dark thoughts and emotions. Usually, it’s the person we least expect. It’s important now more than ever to check up on your loved one’s, coworkers, and friends. WELLNESS: EVEN THE STRONGEST NEEDS A BREAK Unfortunately, what depression look like isn’t always the same.

To be clear, there are many forms of depression. If you or anyone you know are having dark feelings or thoughts and need to talk to someone please seek professional help. You are worth it. You are special and you matter.

Be well on your journey.

RosalynLynn

Be you so you can be fee.

TUESDAY TIP: LEARN FROM YOUR MISTAKES

I wanted to give everyone a quick mental note going into the new year, mistakes are good for you. Learn from your mistakes and never be shamed because you did make a mistake. We often beat ourselves up when we make a mistake. For some it’s very difficult to admit they made a mistake. In the mean time, others won’t even admit they actually do make mistakes. There isn’t anything wrong with making mistakes.

You Are Perfect The Way You Are

The honest to God truth is, we all are going to make mistakes over and over again. It’s all about how we grow and learn from them. Mistakes is how we learn what not to do. Whenever you make a mistake, and learn the correct way to do something, you’ll never make that mistake again. MENTAL HEALTH WELLNESS TIP: ONE STEP AT A TIME

In some situations in life, the only way to move forward is to make that one mistake that will teach us the who, what, where, why, and how.

As we approach the new year, I want the thought of being perfect to leave your mind. Embrace whatever mishaps happened. Figure out how you can learn and grow from them, and leave it as an after thought.

The humility, courage, and confidence you gain from admitting ”I made a mistake” is a power no one can take from you. When we deny, deflect, or dismiss we actually hurt ourselves. We give our power away. Admitting you made a mistake shows character, strength, courage, and humility.

Right now many people are gearing up for the ”new them”. One way to sit in who you are is to acknowledge the mistake that made you a better person today. It could be choosing the wrong partner, career choice, job, move, or conversation. Never regret the decisions or choices. Instead learn from them.

Be well on your journey.

RosalynLynn

Be you so you can be free.

THE HARD THING ABOUT BOUNDARIES

We’ve heard a million people say set boundaries. But setting boundaries isn’t the hard part. The hard thing about boundaries is keeping them and implementing said consequences if someone crosses a boundary.

I think we’ve all said we’re done with someone or a situation and even knew how we were going to handle it in the future. But when that next time came, we got cold feet. We second guess ourselves. The thought of cutting someone off, give us anxiety. We begin to worry about hurting their feelings. Especially if its a close friend or family member. We begin to question if we’re the one’s being too sensitive or overreacting. Having the guts or courage to let someone know they have hurt your feelings brings you embarrassment. You just don’t want to ruffle anyone’s feather. Or cause a scene. Be the person that ruins the dinner, holiday, or trip.

But guess what, that second guessing is what go us to this point. We know how we feel, we know what we need and want, but refuse to say it out of fear. What if you attempt to implement the consequences and it’s not received? The sad part is we are willing to continue to sacrifice our feelings to spare someone else’s. That’s not ok. Putting your feelings and boundaries first is a for sure way to demand respect in a respectful manner. It’s ok to tell others ”you’ve gone too far.”

The first thing to do when setting boundaries is to let them know if you do this, it makes me feel like this, and therefore I would have to do this to protect myself. Protect Your Peace And Energy Make it clear what the boundary is not to cross. Then be specific of what said consequence is for that boundary being crossed. That way when you do have to take action, it doesn’t come as a surprise.

Next, start with realistic consequences that you feel comfortable implementing and sticking to. As time goes on you’ll develop the confidence to be stronger. We often make the mistake of starting off big because we’re so angry but it sets us up to fall hard. Remember it’s just as equally emotional for you to even create said boundaries with certain people.

In your journey of healing and life, boundaries are necessary. Creating them is easy. But the hard thing about boundaries is implementing the consequence. Start at a place where you are confident to handle and make no apologies for. When setting and implementing boundaries we can’t get cold feet, a shaky voice, or apologize before doing it.

Be well on your journey.

RosalynLynn

Be you so you can be free.

4 WAYS TO KNOW YOU’RE ON THE PATH OF HEALING

We have so much material on how to know we’re suffering from a mental or emotional breakdown. However, there are signs to know when you’ve grown. Here are a couple of emotional wellness tips to know when you’ve grown.

First the things that used to trigger you no longer has an effect on you. You know you’ve grown emotionally when you don’t even realized you’ve experience a trigger that you used to have. The things that used to set you off, get you sad, or make you withdrawn doesn’t even touch you. This means you’ve reached a point to where you acknowledge the trigger, understand it, and let it go.

The second way to know you’ve grown emotionally is you respond with grace. You aren’t mad or upset. The desire to be sarcastic or prove your point isn’t there. You are at peace with the situation or relationship. You can wish them well, be in the same room, and your energy isn’t off. That person doesn’t have power over you. You’ve regained your control back.

Thirdly, your mind isn’t constantly occupied with the what ifs. You know longer think about what could have been. Nor do you think how you should have responded or what you wish you would have said. The idea of being anxious about a situation isn’t weighing you down.

Lastly, you see yourself having more good days than bad days. You find yourself smiling and laughing more. The desire to want to get out, enjoy fresh air, be around people, and move is becoming greater. The feeling of being free and lighter is shown through your body language and smile. Overall, you are happy being you.

The ability to overcome, let things go MOTIVATIONAL AND INSPIRATIONAL: JUST LET IT GO, and be at peace is a great gift we can all give to ourselves. However, it is a process and it takes time. Be patient in the process. We all will get to where we want to go.

Those are just 4 things that could let you know you’re beginning to grow. There are many other signs to know you are growing. But if you’re experiencing any of the above, then you are headed on the right track.

RosalynLynn

Be you so you can be free.