The Power of Language: How Your Words Shape Your Mindset

Language is a powerful tool that shapes our thoughts, emotions, and ultimately our reality. The words we choose can either empower us or hold us back. By being mindful of our language choices, we can shift our mindset from one of limitation to one of possibility and growth. Here are ten examples of common phrases and their more empowering alternatives that can positively influence your mindset.

selective focus photography of hustle and bust text

1. “I’m stuck” vs. “I haven’t figured it out yet”

Saying “I’m stuck” implies a sense of helplessness and finality. It suggests that there’s no way forward. On the other hand, “I haven’t figured it out yet” acknowledges that you are in the process of finding a solution. It emphasizes that with time and effort, you will overcome the challenge.

2. “I can’t do this” vs. “I can learn how to do this”

When you say “I can’t do this,” you shut down the possibility of growth. Reframing it to “I can learn how to do this” opens up the potential for learning and improvement. It shifts your focus from your current limitations to your capacity for growth.

3. “It’s too hard” vs. “This is challenging, but I can manage it”

Labeling something as “too hard” can make it seem impossible. Instead, saying “This is challenging, but I can manage it” acknowledges the difficulty while affirming your ability to handle the situation. It reinforces your resilience and problem-solving skills.

4. “I’m not good at this” vs. “I’m improving at this”

Saying “I’m not good at this” can discourage you from trying. Switch your choice of words to “I’m improving at this” to focus on your progress rather than your current skill level. It encourages a growth mindset and motivates you to keep practicing.

5. “I’ll never be able to do that” vs. “I can work towards that”

Declaring “I’ll never be able to do that” closes the door on future opportunities. Instead, “I can work towards that” recognizes that achieving your goal may take time and effort, but it’s within your reach. It promotes perseverance and long-term planning.

6. “This always happens to me” vs. “I can change my approach”

Saying “This always happens to me” can make you feel like a victim of circumstances. Refocus it to “I can change my approach” to take control of the situation. It empowers you to take action and make changes that can lead to better outcomes.

7. “I failed” vs. “I learned something valuable”

Viewing a setback as a failure can be demoralizing. Instead, saying “I learned something valuable” highlights the lessons you gained from the experience. It transforms a negative event into a stepping stone for future success.

8. “I’m overwhelmed” vs. “I’m prioritizing my tasks”

Feeling overwhelmed can paralyze you. Shift your language and mind to “I’m prioritizing my tasks” to take a realistic approach. It shifts your focus from the chaos to the steps you can take to manage your workload more effectively. 5 PHRASES TO REMOVE FROM YOUR VOCABULARY

9. “I have to do this” vs. “I get to do this”

Saying “I have to do this” can make tasks feel like burdens. Instead, “I get to do this” frames them as opportunities. This subtle shift in language can make even mundane tasks feel more meaningful and enjoyable. We’ve all heard “I get to go to work, instead of I have to go to work” example.

10. “I wish I could” vs. “I’m going to make this happen”

Wishing for something can feel passive and unattainable. Speak it to existence “I’m going to make this happen” to commit to taking action. It empowers you to take the necessary steps to turn your wishes into reality.

The words we use have a profound impact on our mindset and how we approach life’s challenges. By choosing language that empowers and uplifts, we can cultivate a more positive and proactive outlook. Next time you catch yourself using limiting language, try reframing your words to open up new possibilities. Remember, your mindset shapes your reality, and the power to change it starts with the words you choose.

MARCH TO YOUR OWN RHYTHM

In the grand scheme of life, it’s easy to find ourselves pulled in various directions by the opinions and expectations of others. Yet, amidst the noise, remember the invaluable importance of staying true to yourself. March to your own rhythm of life.

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Being you and your most authentic self is your greatest asset. Like a compass pointing north, your inner values and beliefs should guide your journey and move you along your path. Resist the urge to mold yourself into someone you’re not only to fit into what society expectations are of you.

Be the unique masterpiece that you were created to be. As I’ve told my kids, God only created one you, so you are one of a kind and own it. Embrace your quirks, your passions, and your dreams. The world benefits most when everyone show up as their genuine selves. Resulting in color, expression, new ideas, new experiences, life abundance, and endless possibilities . It’s not about conforming; it’s about placing your fingerprint on a canvas of existence .

The path less traveled may be lonely, cold, rugged, and long, but it’s often where you’ll discover your true strength and potential. Your voice, your perspective, and your choices matter. Don’t be afraid to dance to your own beat of life . Daily Inspiration: YOU ARE ENOUGH

Remember, it’s okay to be inspired by others, but let that inspiration fuel your individuality and creativity rather than dictate your identity. Embrace your uniqueness with pride, and in doing so, you’ll inspire others to do the same.

Stay true to your being, in return, you’ll find a sense of fulfillment and purpose that is uniquely yours. March to your own rhythm of life.

RosalynLynn

Be you so you can be free.

GRATITUDE REALLY DOES WORK

After listening to many motivational videos, the one thing that was repeated consistently was exercising gratitude. No matter who was speaking or what they were speaking on, gratitude really does work and get you out of a funk instantly. This is something I had to work at and exercise in my daily life.

photograph of a person s hand holding a gift box

We get many examples of this in our daily life. There was a point of 2 months span, we had to get both our vehicles fixed. One vehicle we had to get fixed twice in one month. And the other vehicle once. Was it frustrating. ABSOLUTELY!!!! Did we have other plans we wanted to do. YUP. But I had to quickly remind my husband, let’s be grateful and thank God we had the ability and finances to get them fixed. Neither one of us had to miss work and we are still alive and breathing. What was supposed to happen, happened. How we respond is up to us. MENTAL HEALTH REMINDER: YOU CAN LOVE YOURSELF RIGHT NOW

But this thought of gratitude really working came to me when a woman, 92 years young, came to my office to have a thank you card published in the monthly newspaper. She had been in the hospital the previous week and she wanted to thank her family and friends for their well wishes, cards, visits, and prepped meals. However, repeatedly she kept saying how grateful she was to be alive. She really thought her time was up. She said being able to wake up in her home in her bed was the best gift God gave her to do again. All she wanted to do was give her thanks while she’s still here. https://amzn.to/41FE15S Lastly, the best part she said , “you know He really didn’t have to save me”.

I froze at my desk. Ros what do you have to complain about? I responded to myself quickly, nothing at all. I have a home with air conditioning. There are people sleeping on the streets in this hot summer heat. I have food to eat. Many families are going to shelters and Salvation Army’s to get meals. I have a job. My husband has a job. We have vehicles to get to work. Our health is good. Our kids smiled today. I had a drink of clean water. Most importantly I have the ability to pass this on.

So if you’re unhappy about your current situation or going through anything, look around, write down 10 things that you are grateful for. Remember every situation is temporary. Learn what you need. That’s how we grow. We are forced out of our comfort zones when we’re stubborn. Each day practice gratitude. In order to increase and reach our full capacity we must be grateful now so we can appreciate more later. Be well!!!!

RosalynLynn

Be you so you can be free.

HEALING THROUGH PAIN

Yes, her son is laying in an hospital bed awaiting another surgery as he battles through cancer. She’s put him on the prayer list, fast, and took him communion. But our plans aren’t God’s plans. As he takes his rest and falls asleep, she decided to go to the Dollar tree buy applesauce, green beans, pop tarts, noodles, and corn to deliver to the church for their monthly Salvation Army donation.

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Her healing through her pain comes as she watches her third son battle cancer. She lost her husband to cancer. She’s not as stable herself as she go through her golden years. But she said, “I just take my time you know, I’ll get there.” WOW!!!! 5 REASONS VULNERABILITY IS STRENGTH

GO FIND YOU SOME STRENGTH!!!!!! She said I can’t do anything while he sleeps. I might as well go make sure some kids have something to eat and don’t go hungry. I can’t let myself go. Who’s going to be there when the doctor needs to speak with next of kin. I can’t control the cancer, I’m not a doctor, and God still gave me strength to get up.

Sure, getting up, having breakfast, going to the store, talking to other shoppers, getting some sunlight, and getting some exercise is a mental refresh. Continuing to choose to live provides endless amount of strength. Healing through pain is the only way to get through.

If you are going through anything painful, know that it is temporary. You will get to the light. Find a source of strength to grow through your healing. There is a purpose and reason. It’s not just a cliche, but our loved ones doesn’t expect us to stop living because they are ill. They truly would want you to continue living. Live for you. Live for them.

RosalynLynn

Be you so you can be free.

6 QUESTIONS TO ASK WHEN BREAKING HABITS

Trying to break or get out of a bad habit can sometimes feel like you’re on a hamster wheel. To begin getting through the habit there are some questions that needs answers. We would all love to just wake up one day and say it’s done, I’m never doing it again, or I understand. This came when I was speaking with someone regarding their poor financial habits.

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  1. What is the habit? Identify specifically what the habit is. For example, don’t say I have a problem with money. Say, I fail to budget. I don’t have a plan for my money. I spend money on take out food. Whatever it is that you’re trying to breakthrough write it down to the point.
  2. When did this become a habit? Think back to the point, event, or time your mind processed something and the habit was the solution. When thinking of the point get as descriptive as possible.
  3. What does this habit do for you? How does it comfort you? Even though you may identify it’s wrong or a bad habit, what temporary instant gratification do you get.
  4. When emotions calm down, do you feel remorse, guilt, and regret? Do you embrace it and apologize. Attempt to make it right. Or do you make excuses to justify the habit.
  5. What past trauma triggers or is associated with this habit. So often we respond to people, things, situations, or circumstances based on some unhealed experience.
  6. What positive habit can I replace it with? What are some actions, plans, and goals I can put into place to hold myself accountable. 6 SIMPLE HABITS TO BE GOOD TO YOU

Those are six questions that would help you understand your mindset regarding the bad habit. Therefore, you’ll be able to reframe your mindset to a new positive mindset, attitude, and habit. It could be alcohol, money habits, using foul language, procrastinating, eating habits, or exercising or anything . Figure out your answers for you.

RosalynLynn

Be you so you can be free.

THIS IS WHAT FAITH, HOPE, AND BELIEF LOOKS LIKE

As I’ve progressed in my self awareness journey I’ve mastered the skill of being present in the moment and able to receive the messages as they come. If I ever have to question what faith, hope, and belief look like I witnessed it first hand. And more importantly there was action behind the belief.

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As I sit and listen to her answer the question “So how is your mom doing?”, her voice doesn’t quiver. She doesn’t hesitate to say “it’s not the absolute worst nor is it better.” She confessed her mother had several mini strokes which led to her dementia. Then she delivered what faith, hope, and belief looks like: She said, “My hope is that mom has a final stroke and she goes in her sleep.”

Now on the surface you would clutch your pearls. But when you believe and have faith, you know living with a loved one who has no quality of life, has pain around the clock, loss of appetite, loss of movement in limbs, lack of awareness of themselves and loved ones, that isn’t the life you’d hope for for them. Yes, we want them around but at some point it becomes selfish. In result, whenever they do transition, we are left with the pain of what their last days reflected. MENTAL NOTE OF THE DAY

As she describes the emotional and physical toll it takes to care for her aging mother that has dementia, she’s still very self aware of her own needs. She told her mom, I have to go out and see people. She refuses to give up her life. Her hobbies, craft and book club weekly meetings. As well as church.

As she was speaking I could’t help but reflect on the countless family members and friends that gave up their life taking care of their loved one. After my grandma transitioned, all the arrangements and services were done, my mom sat at the table and said, “I don’t know what to do everyday.” Why? Because for months she gave up her entire being to take care of grandma.

Even in the midst of grief, her ability to have self awareness, emotional wellness, and boundaries inspired me to continue. We’re going to experience some raw emotions and experiences, but all the while it’s still priority to put ourselves first. No matter what the situation is, we are left with ourselves to move on.

Have faith, hope, and belief. Believe you have the power and strength to do all things and over come all things. Just because you’re having a hiccup doesn’t mean to lack self care. If anything, ramp it up.

RosalynLynn

Be you so you can be free.

HARVEST CONFIDENCE THIS FALL

By definition harvest means the process or period of gathering crops. Through our daily habits, self care activities, and wellness journey we harvest confidence. Planting the proper seeds for our mental, emotional, and physical health will give us the strong confidence needed to sustain this thing called life. Harvesting and planting the proper seeds are important because confidence isn’t a one and done. Confidence is a muscle we must water and exercise daily.

brown pots with white seeds

Plant seeds of boundaries within you. I don’ t mean cutting people off. If that’s necessary then do so. But I’ve learned to tell people (meaning family members) don’t call me talking about another family member. When they text how is so and so doing, I don’t even respond to that text. Now, when they text me and ask me how the kids are doing I’ll respond. If someone needs a ride and I have plans, I’ll let them know I have plans I can take you when I’m done. It’s more about not stretching yourself thin to the point you’re burned out.

Another thing I do, throughout the day, take a break. Plant seeds of permission to yourself to take a break. Yes, a day off is good. Vacations are good. Lazy days are good. However, small breaks daily can become more beneficial and effective. During the day at work, if I notice I’ve been going since I sat down at the computer, I’ll stop, and give myself a mental break. Get up. Step outside. Go to the bathroom. Get a snack or something to drink. Most importantly I’ll read a good passage. My go to for this is Hallmarks mahogany.com. The community writing group is amazing.

Plant seeds of protection. If I don’t want to do something or go somewhere I’ll say no. I no longer do so just to keep the peace. So often I’d say yes because I didn’t want them to think I was an ungrateful person or rejecting them by rejecting their invitation.

A great seed to plant is a cutoff seed. Sometimes I can go all day and not realize I haven’t sat down or watched a program on TV. After several loads of laundry, cooking, and taking care of my family, I’ll tell them I’m done for the day. I’m going to do something for me. This prevents me feeling overwhelmed and burned out. 15 DAILY AFFIRMATIONS TO BOOST CONFIDENCE

Lastly, seeds of investing in self. My night time cap is very important to my mental health. It allows me to put a period on the day and have a clear mental space in the morning. Same with my morning routine. Getting ready, making sure I feel my best to present gives me confidence to walk in any room and offer my authentic self.

Harvesting and plating seeds to build confidence takes patience. Start within. What do you mentally and emotionally to feel confident. Most of the time once that happens it’ll spill to the outer.

This fall plant you some seeds of confidence. The confidence you build will give you the motivation and inspiration to go after what you’re afraid to do right now.

RosalynLynn

Be you so you can be free.

IT’S THE FIRST OF THE YEAR

Well, for me it’s the first of the year. Today is my birthday and I’ve always used my birthday as my “reset” day, beginning day, or milestone day. Every since I was a teenager I’ve always viewed my birthday as a deadline date to do something or start something . I never wanted a big party or extravagant gifts. For me, I’d wake up and make a goal about what I wanted personally for myself by the my next birthday.

birthday card and bouquet of flowers

A couple years ago, I turned 40 and that was my big day to cut my hair. I set goals on how I wanted to feel, where I wanted to be mentally, emotionally. My birthday is my first of the year. I love spending the day being me. Isn’t that’s what it’s for? To be in peace and completely me. My plan for the day is to wake up, get myself all dolled up, light my new candle, and sit outside and drink my coffee in one of my favorite mugs.

The simple things and the simple life is what I enjoy. I’ve learned to let things go. Let them be what they are. Not worry about what they could have been or what I hoped for. Time is very precious. I know it’s a cliche, but really it is. Just look it’s the middle of August. If I want to do something, buy somethings, go somewhere, eat something, then I’m going to do it. I understand the purpose of living each day. I won’t get them back.

”Sometimes you need to take a break from everyone and spend time alone, to experience, appreciate, and love yourself.”- Robert Tew

One of my goals was to be more self aware and emotionally strong. Not take things personally. Be confident in myself. Give myself without depleting me. Being honest in my communication. Standing on my boundaries without being dismissive. Not feeling like I have to explain myself. Being knowledgeable, comfortable, and confident in my decisions. Not seeking validation or approval to live or just be me.

I enjoy my birthday. I own my birthday. It’s the first of the year for me. My goal is to continue my quest of emotional intelligence. Using my path and journey to pour into family, friends, and my children. I feel great and grateful for the mental clarity that God gives me. I like me. I love who I am becoming and hope it’s infectious.

My hope for you is to find your own way of feeling free. Whatever that may look like for you. How do you reset, reflect, and recharge? Do you use January 1 or your birthday like I do? Or some other day?

Be well!!!!

RosalynLynn

Be you so you can be free.

HOW RISKY ARE YOU: TO QUIT OR NOT QUIT YOUR JOB

Since the pandemic many have had an awakening of becoming their own boss versus working the current job they have. They had an epiphany about what they missed out on, financial freedom, flexibility, and being appreciated. However, depending on who you ask there may or may not be a right or wrong way to go about it.

a person holding black desk calculator

The Risk Taker

First you have those that says I’m going to bet on myself. I’m tired of working a 9-5. I want to be my own boss. They want the flexibility to work or create when they are most effective. The risk taker also is someone who has many ideas, creative, and very social. They have much confidence in themselves and says I’m going to win no matter what. The risk taker says if you have a plan B, then you aren’t putting all your efforts into Plan A. So of course you’re going to have to rely on Plan B one day. FINANCIAL MINDSET: WHICH ONE ARE YOU?

As Steve Harvey once said, “If my plan A doesn’t work then I’ll create another plan A.”

There isn’t a certain time to be stable to branch out on your own. Anything can happen. The more you try to work and save until you have enough, the longer you’re prolonging your dream and happiness. The comfort will always have you pushing back the deadline to begin your own.

The risk taker may also feel the company can shut down at any moment. They can lay you off without warning. Cut positions, hours, and benefits. Then where will that lead you. https://amzn.to/3NQgytd

The Cautious One

Next, we have those that says I have a family and bills. What about insurance. What if something happens. They are used to that guaranteed amount and needs that security “just in case.” It’s best to save at least six months, some say, before quitting your job. You need to make sure you’re financially secure and the family is stable while pursuing your dream. It’s all about security and comfort.

So do you quit your job and bet on yourself? Or keep that stable job until you feel you’re ready to stand on your own. Either way there are pros and cons to each. Depending on your life, lifestyle, circumstances, financial status, and many other factors. They both have the same end goal. To be financially free and to have something to pass down to their children. Doing what they love. Having fun. At some point working minimum hours while receiving maximum profit. https://amzn.to/41OXlOo

I’m a believer in your job or career should fit into your life not your life fitting into your job.

Which mindset are you? Quit or not?

RosalynLynn

Be you so you can be free.

FAMILY AND CAREER: CAN YOU HAVE BOTH?

This is something that I’ve been thinking about for awhile now. Can you have both: family and career. Some says yes and others says no. Both are full time jobs. Due to my husband position I was the one who had to be extremely flexible and sacrifice. With that being said, I knew I wanted to be present mentally and emotionally for my kids. I only have them for a short amount of time before they expand their wings and go on their own. Conversations with those of my generation, one of the common themes was lack of emotional support. Having a parent interested them, their thoughts, feelings, interest, views, likes, and dislikes.

glad family having breakfast at table

I’ve watched some friends and family members raise their children completely different and saw outcomes that support both.

First we have the one parent that says I have to work and pay the bills. This parent works two jobs. By the time she gets home her children are in bed. She hasn’t seen them since they left for the school bus. She says they’ve text throughout the day and they are ok. Are they really? Also she believes they love hanging out with their friends and they don’t care if she goes to work. But for some reason one daughter is always calling her at work saying she’s sick. She wants her mom to come pick her up and stay with her at home. She sends dad.

She says they have everything they ask for. That’s why I’m working so much. I take them on a vacation every summer. We have a lake house. I have to work and have my life. She’s right. But is there a cost.

Then she says there’s no need to go to parent teacher conference. Her kids aren’t failing. She thinks her kids doesn’t want her at events, they don’t care. She and her husband told their son because they had to work 2 jobs he couldn’t join baseball because they couldn’t commit. 3 SELF CARE MISTAKES I MADE AS A STAY AT HOME MOM

On the other hand, we have the one who says I’m going to go to every event, game, show, award ceremony my kid have. I’ll live a subtle life to spend time with the kids. They don’t need name brand stuff all the time. She works just under 40 hours and leaves at 4pm because she says getting off at 5pm is too late for her to start her evening with the kids. They have TV shows they watch together. They eat dinner together. She’s the carpool mom and is very inquisitive about their friends and social life.

She says she’s being a concerned mom. She wants to know everything about them and be there for them. Is there a such thing as a helicopter mom?

Yes kids love having “stuff”. But at the end of the day they want mom or dad there. Not necessarily engaging, but available. They want that comfort and security of knowing you’re around. Or else the risk of the kids learning and finding their way without you can hurt them and the relationship.

No one can put 100% in two things. Being present physically, is different from being present mentally and emotionally. Kids really don’t care about the money.

A couple weeks ago my daughter had an award ceremony because she was nominated for Student Of The Month. During this ceremony there were also other awards given for different categories and grades. Sure the ceremony was on a Friday morning at 9am. They had coffee, donuts, milk and water for us to snack on with our kid until the ceremony started. We were able to mix and mingle with the other parents as well.

However, it broke my heart so bad that a couple of kids didn’t have parents to show. These were huge awards that all teachers and counselors voted on for a particular student. They were eating donuts alone. Looking so sad. At one point I even told my daughter to go tell one student to come sit with us. I just couldn’t help it.

When their name were called up, the counselor read the loving note from the teacher that nominated them. They received their award and took photos. The body language and the barely there smile killed me. At some point I heard a little guy say, my mom couldn’t come she had to work.

Yes you have to work. May not be able to get off every time. But unfortunately, the only things the kids see and remember is being alone at some pretty great moments. No material thing can get rid of that.

Of course, family dynamics, finances, and type of career makes a difference.

So can you really have it all? Family and Career.

RosalynLynn

Be you so you can be free.