SPRING, BLOSSOM, AND FLOURISH

Hello there…

I thought I’d pop in here and remind you to continue to plant yourself with seeds of faith, hope, inspiration, love, and joy.

white printed paper with four white roses

We’re four days into March and spring is quickly approaching. As the days grow longer and the world begins to awaken from its winter slumber, let this be a reminder that just like nature, we too have the power to bloom and flourish.

March signifies a fresh start, a chance to shed the old and embrace the new. The flowers are pushing through the soil, the trees are budding with new life, and so can you. Push your way out of whatever is holding you back. Take this opportunity to plant the seeds of your dreams and watch them grow.

In the gentle warmth of spring, find the inspiration to spread your seeds of potential. Let go of any doubts that may have held you back and step into this season with confidence. Release any fear or negative doubts preventing you from watering the garden of you. The world is full of possibilities, and March is the perfect time to seize them. 2022 SPRING SELF CARE CHECKLIST

Embrace the energy of this colorful, warm, windy, and fresh season. Allow the blooming flowers and the budding leaves to symbolize your own growth and resilience. March forward with determination, knowing that every step you take is a step towards your goals.

Remember, just as March marks the end of winter, it can also mark the end of any stagnation in your life. Embrace the changes, embrace the challenges, and embrace the opportunities that come your way.

This is your season to shine, to blossom, and to flourish. Happy March, and may this spring be the beginning of something beautiful in your life!

GRATITUDE REALLY DOES WORK

After listening to many motivational videos, the one thing that was repeated consistently was exercising gratitude. No matter who was speaking or what they were speaking on, gratitude really does work and get you out of a funk instantly. This is something I had to work at and exercise in my daily life.

photograph of a person s hand holding a gift box

We get many examples of this in our daily life. There was a point of 2 months span, we had to get both our vehicles fixed. One vehicle we had to get fixed twice in one month. And the other vehicle once. Was it frustrating. ABSOLUTELY!!!! Did we have other plans we wanted to do. YUP. But I had to quickly remind my husband, let’s be grateful and thank God we had the ability and finances to get them fixed. Neither one of us had to miss work and we are still alive and breathing. What was supposed to happen, happened. How we respond is up to us. MENTAL HEALTH REMINDER: YOU CAN LOVE YOURSELF RIGHT NOW

But this thought of gratitude really working came to me when a woman, 92 years young, came to my office to have a thank you card published in the monthly newspaper. She had been in the hospital the previous week and she wanted to thank her family and friends for their well wishes, cards, visits, and prepped meals. However, repeatedly she kept saying how grateful she was to be alive. She really thought her time was up. She said being able to wake up in her home in her bed was the best gift God gave her to do again. All she wanted to do was give her thanks while she’s still here. https://amzn.to/41FE15S Lastly, the best part she said , “you know He really didn’t have to save me”.

I froze at my desk. Ros what do you have to complain about? I responded to myself quickly, nothing at all. I have a home with air conditioning. There are people sleeping on the streets in this hot summer heat. I have food to eat. Many families are going to shelters and Salvation Army’s to get meals. I have a job. My husband has a job. We have vehicles to get to work. Our health is good. Our kids smiled today. I had a drink of clean water. Most importantly I have the ability to pass this on.

So if you’re unhappy about your current situation or going through anything, look around, write down 10 things that you are grateful for. Remember every situation is temporary. Learn what you need. That’s how we grow. We are forced out of our comfort zones when we’re stubborn. Each day practice gratitude. In order to increase and reach our full capacity we must be grateful now so we can appreciate more later. Be well!!!!

RosalynLynn

Be you so you can be free.

HEALING THROUGH PAIN

Yes, her son is laying in an hospital bed awaiting another surgery as he battles through cancer. She’s put him on the prayer list, fast, and took him communion. But our plans aren’t God’s plans. As he takes his rest and falls asleep, she decided to go to the Dollar tree buy applesauce, green beans, pop tarts, noodles, and corn to deliver to the church for their monthly Salvation Army donation.

Her healing through her pain comes as she watches her third son battle cancer. She lost her husband to cancer. She’s not as stable herself as she go through her golden years. But she said, “I just take my time you know, I’ll get there.” WOW!!!! 5 REASONS VULNERABILITY IS STRENGTH

GO FIND YOU SOME STRENGTH!!!!!! She said I can’t do anything while he sleeps. I might as well go make sure some kids have something to eat and don’t go hungry. I can’t let myself go. Who’s going to be there when the doctor needs to speak with next of kin. I can’t control the cancer, I’m not a doctor, and God still gave me strength to get up.

Sure, getting up, having breakfast, going to the store, talking to other shoppers, getting some sunlight, and getting some exercise is a mental refresh. Continuing to choose to live provides endless amount of strength. Healing through pain is the only way to get through.

If you are going through anything painful, know that it is temporary. You will get to the light. Find a source of strength to grow through your healing. There is a purpose and reason. It’s not just a cliche, but our loved ones doesn’t expect us to stop living because they are ill. They truly would want you to continue living. Live for you. Live for them.

RosalynLynn

Be you so you can be free.

MENTAL HEALTH REMINDER: YOUR PROBLEM IS YOURS

I know I know, it seems very harsh to tell someone your problem is yours. Well when I heard it, I felt and thought the same thing. She said no one cares that your feelings are hurt. Why are you constantly complaining about something that happened last week, last month, last year, or when you were thirteen. Within two days I heard this from two different people on two different media. It had me pondering.

They are right!!!!!

We can’t erase or undo everything that has been said or done to us. In turn, we make it about what they said, what they did, how they made you feel, and nothing is about us. What someone else say or do has nothing to do with us. It has everything to do with how they feel about themselves.

In our anger, hurt, and sadness we freeze and wait for that person to make everything right. When, if they thought they did something wrong they would have done it. If you get an apology the problem is still yours. On the other hand, if you don’t the problem is still yours. What is the apology going to do for you? Because emotions are raw, will you be in a place to receive the apology, accept it, and forgive? Everything was made about them and not you. 10 FUN JOURNAL PROMPTS TO GET YOUR MIND OFF YOUR PROBLEMS

We can pour our hearts out and the problem is still ours. Either one one of two things. They will understand and empathize. Or completely gaslight and blame you for taking it the way you did. In result, you’re left with fixing the problem.

No matter what, your problem is yours. You are the only one who can make yourself whole, process, and get through. A large mistake is waiting or expecting others to solve our problems. We’ll be waiting forever. I had this breakthrough when I had to ask myself what kind of relationship was I going to participate in with my mother. I’m not going to get the mother I wanted when I was little. No matter how much I’ve expressed to her my feelings nothing has changed. So what am I to do. I had to reconcile all that and accept the mother she chooses to be and engage on my terms.

If you’re battling some problems. It’s yours. Take your power back and fix it for yourself.

RosalynLynn

Be you so you can be free.

GENTLE REMINDER ABOUT SELF CARE

So I thought I’d pop on here real quick and remind everyone self care doesn’t absolve you of pain, hurt, anger, frustration, insecurities, and more. It gives you a foundation, balance, and practical ways to address and adapt to life as it comes. Practicing self care will evolve as you grow mentally, emotionally, and spiritually. Your needs, wants, desires, likes, dis likes, level of tolerance, and so on will forever change. Remember your self care is for you.

What do you need on a daily to feel encouraged, supported, loved, and free to be you? Listen to your body when you’re feeling uneasy. YOUR MIND AND BODY GIVES YOU ALL THE ANSWERS YOU NEED How can you tap into yourself to soothe, heal, and grow through the distress. When feeling “Un”, what is it that has triggered you? Unloved, unattractive, unwanted, unappreciated, unhelpful, unworthy, unproductive, untrustworthy, unbalanced, and any un feeling you may encounter.

”Sometimes the most productive thing you can do is relax.”- Mark Black

Self love and self care is prioritizing you so you can be at your best in the midst of happiness and sadness. Loving you is giving yourself permission to evolve, grow, heal, be better, do better, and live your life not live how others think you should. Practicing self care provides emotional riches for you to pull from in times of need and even in joy. Remember when you have a great day, moment, or event; celebrate it!!!!

In this time before the holiday season begin, give yourself time and permission to take care of you. It’s going to look different from time to time. And that is normal and ok. It will feel awkward and uncomfortable. It supposed to. At times you’re going to feel alone and lonely. That is normal and supposed to happen. Thoughts of confusion, feeling misunderstood, and giving up will creep in, that is normal. Remember your why.

Self care is a journey. You’re unlearning, to relearn. Challenging every thing you thought was right or what was taught. Going against the grain. Give yourself permission. Patience. Time. Enjoy your day!!!!

RosalynLynn

Be you so you can be free.

3 SELF CARE MOMENTS FROM LAST WEEK

As I continue on my journey, I am acknowledging, without guilt, my moments that make me feel good or show growth. Last week I had three moments where I was proud of myself for letting go, not allowing guilt to consume me, and relaxing.

Rest and relax. Many times we say we are relaxing but still our minds may be occupied with work, family, schedule, kids, to do list, housework, and other tasks. On Saturday morning we woke up early to be out for a 9:00 am parade. I usually like to have a slow Saturday morning and let the day come to me. However, after the parade I was cold, because fall weather decided to show up that morning. My cheeks were frozen along with my fingertips. I began cleaning the kitchen and fixing something quick to eat. Ran the dishwasher and said “I’m done.” I changed into some comfy clothes, put my rollers back in my hair, got my cup of coffee, and binged on a show. I eventually fell asleep for a nap and didn’t feel guilty. In result, my body and mind well rested.
Release my control and let my children be. My son wanted to cook his own lunch using the griddle. Usually I’ll say, I can cook you something. SideNote: The struggle in realizing my kids no longer need me is real. But I knew he wanted to cook for himself. So he asked me what to do. I told him what to do, make sure he cleans, and went back to my room to binge. I was proud of myself. The mom in me is letting my kids go. He did an amazing job. The food turned out good. He cleaned the kitchen and was proud of himself. It was great for the both of us.
Didn’t take ownership of my moms behavior. While out one day, someone came up to me and expressed how she didn’t have a good interaction with my mom. She asked how she was doing. Without blinking I said she is doing great. I just left her. Two things I was proud of. First my initial reaction wasn’t to apologize. Typically we feel the need to apologize and we had nothing to do with the situation or wasn’t even about us. We mistake apologizing for making someone feel better. No, that is taking ownership. Stop taking ownership for stuff that ain’t yours. Second she didn’t ask me a question until she said “How is your mom doing?”. Again I’ve learned to actively listen. Answer what is asked and stop giving up information when not asked or necessary.

Those were my 3 self care moments that made me proud. Gave me the confidence to continue, know I’m on the right path, and stay in the moment. At the end of each day or week pat yourself on the back for your accomplishments. Nothing is ever too small or too big . TGIF: SELF CARE IS ALL AROUND YOU

RosalynLynn

Be you so you can be free.

HE WASN’T MAD AT ME

After 30 minutes of crying my eyes out and going for a walk, I realized he wasn’t mad at me. One day my brother called me and immediately from hello, I knew he was heated. Now, I’m still being my normal self because in my mind I know it’s not towards me or about me. “Did you know auntie moved to Vegas?” I answered, yes. Well what do I get for being honest.

He yelled, cursed, and went on a tangent about how he’s always the last to know anything. The family only calls him when they want or need something. I’m stunned and confused because it had been more than a week or so that she moved. She told me she was going to call everyone with her new address and information. So I’m thinking to myself, she hasn’t gotten around to it. My aunt had this grand plan to tell everyone because she was hosting Thanksgiving this year.

Well after about 2 attempts of me trying to get a word in, he said “I see how y’all are, if that’s how you want to be, fine!!” He hung up on me. I looked at my husband and we both were confused. Immediately I burst into tears, ran upstairs, put on my walking clothes, grabbed my earbuds and went out for a walk. My husband was trying to catch me but I just had to go. My brother and I have always been close, never had arguments or disagreements, always one another confidant, and I just couldn’t believe he spoke to me the way he did. GROWTH TIP: YOU CAN LEARN FROM ANYONE

Now the old me kicked in for a minute and instantly said I’m not calling him, I’m not answering his calls, and he has done it for himself. But then after 30 minutes it clicked, he wasn’t mad at me. Thank God for journaling, prayer, meditation, and inner healing. Here’s what I figured out:

He was mad at my aunt but couldn’t express that due to ego, hurt, and lack of understanding. Now my aunt and him were like two peas in a pot. They had the best relationship. He was upset because he felt like they had an unbreakable bond and he wasn’t the first person she told. Every time I tried to encourage him to think about it in another perspective, he shot me down.
Which leads me to, when someone has something already made up in their mind there is no way to get them to think about things differently. Especially if they haven’t done internal work to understand their triggers, misunderstandings, and communication.
This is exactly what they mean when they say, don’t take things personally. It had nothing to do with me. He was upset with her and I was the one who answered the phone. My brother is a self admitted people pleaser, he doesn’t like when people think negative of him, and my aunt is the one who was able to get to him. So he felt betrayal probably.
For me, it’s a reminder that you have to remain emotionally sound to ensure you don’t damage yourself, others, and relationships. If I would have reacted and matched his emotions, tone, and demeanor it would have took a turn that would have been difficult to come back from. In the very beginning of the call I was able to recognize he just wanted to get out what he made up in his head and a response wasn’t wanted, needed, or required.
Don’t let others anger, feelings, and misunderstandings change you or how you feel. Be who you are and when there is an opportunity for encouragement and inspiration then give it. It will be received and comprehended when it’s settled.

I had to look back at this exchange and say I’m proud of myself. This allowed me to answer the phone when he called me again, have a conversation, and continue to be brother and sister. The cherry on top was, I told my husband I don’t want or need an apology. I’m ok. I just want him to get to a point where he doesn’t have to people please and prove himself. What he doesn’t realize is, it was more of a reminder for me to continue to do the work.

RosalynLynn

Be you so you can be free.

WHAT THEY MEAN WHEN THEY SAY “YOU NEVER KNOW”

It’s almost become a cliche when you hear “ you never know what people are going through “. We hear it so often, but how often do we think about it, exercise it, and give others grace. Although it’s probably an over used point, it still rings true. People only tell us what they want us to know. We only see what people want us to see especially on social media. Just think about your favorite celebrity, athlete, or influencer that have such a great presence but suffers from depression.

white printer paper with be kind text on plants

You never know what people are going through so be kind. That rung true and reminded me on my morning commute to work.

As I’m driving, I had to do a double take in my rear view mirror. A woman who also appears to be driving to work. She had on a nice ivory blouse. Beautiful jewelry and her long thick hair was bouncy with big curls. Yes, I saw all of this because I have great attention to detail and it was a beautiful sunny morning. Anyway, on my double take, I notice she’s wiping her eyes. Hmmmm. This wasn’t a typical I have allergies wipe or anything.

So I doubled back. This woman was sobbing. When I say sobbing, she’s doing the ugly cry. The light turns red. And I’m siting there contemplating getting her attention for her to pull over. Number one, we don’t want an accident. And number two, baby you need to let that cry out. But she took advantage of this red light because she sobbed, wiped her face, and fixed her banes. That’s my girl!!! So I opted not to get her attention. My heart just ached for her. Light turns green, she wipes her eyes, and hit a left turn while I keep straight.

I get to work and immediately thought you really never know what people are going through. My mind began thinking about her mental and emotional wellness throughout the day. She’s full of emotions, they’re all over the place and when she hits work, immediately shut them off. Hence her constantly fixing her banes and making sure she didn’t mess up all her makeup. Then pretending like everything is ok, try to be productive, and professional.

You know you’ll always have the coworker’s to ask are you ok. If you say yes, they may pressure because they can clearly see your face is flushed, swollen, and your demeanor isn’t the norm they are used to. On the other hand, you may have a coworker that think you’re having an attitude, not being polite, or great to work around that day. When all you’re trying to do is make it through the day without crying and do your job.

Then, when she gets off, whatever had her sobbing emerges to the front again and now she’s an emotional wreck all over again. Can you imagine the emotional roller coaster and the ride she’s taking? So when people say you never know what others are going through, BE KIND. Here’s a reminder. Even if she wasn’t going to work. The fact is we all have emotional roller coaster rides, act like nothing is going on, and then getting back on the ride.

Remember some handle the ride well and others take a while to calm down. You never know. Be well!!!

RosalynLynn

Be you so you can be free.

DON’T LET SOCIAL MEDIA KEEP YOU BROKE

Mindless scrolling will keep you broke. Consuming too much social media will keep you broke. The endless amount of content that people put out there and sell will have you thinking what you have is never enough, outdated, out of season, or just wrong. Please keep in mind they make a commission, receive products for free, and often times return product back to the store after posting.

We live in a world where over consumption is keeping everyone broke trying to keep up with the latest of latest.

News flash, you don’t need a tiny home size closet. Having a wall of shoes that you probably only wear once is unrealistic. That is a waste of money. No one needs 30 pair of jeans. 20 white shirts. Please take the fashion inspiration and filter the rest. Also wear what you want. Who needs a new wardrobe every season? All it takes is investing in a few good pieces to create multiple outfits. Think about it, many of us grab the same pieces to wear to work, do errands, lounge around, and even during exercise.

Next, take it from me, a beauty junkie, there’s absolutely no reason anyone needs 10 foundations, 15 eyeshadow palettes, 40 lipsticks, and 20 bronzers. First of all, you’re never going to use any one product until it’s gone. Money wasted. The product does expire. And the rate these cosmetic companies are putting out new products it’s just useless, wasteful, and unnecessary. Many of your favorite gurus don’t even use the product after posting. Again having a closet just for makeup is unrealistic. Get you the basics you need and replenish as needed.

Talking about social media keeping you broke, who has the time and money to go on 4 lavish and exotic vacations every year. In the real world, a family barely takes one vacation a year. Don’t let social media think you’re not living life if you aren’t jet setting across the globe. Spoiler alert: some of them aren’t either. Much of what you see is FAKE!!!!! You can have a great life experiencing local festivities and activities.

Ok, this is the last one and it’s a doozy. Before you check out of your Amazon cart, ask yourself if it’s a need. I love watching “25 Things You Didn’t Know You Needed From Amazon”, but I don’t go buy them. I guarantee, if you look around your home, there are items purchased that aren’t being used. Just gadgets that seem cool, fun to look at, or great concept for a one time use. Everything should have a place and there’s a place for everything.

Social media can be a great tool for inspiration. But leave it there. Keep things in perspective. Be realistic. And while they are making a great living don’t you go broke buying everything they recommend because “it’s a must have.” ALL MY SOCIAL MEDIA APPS DELETED

Ironically this will not only help your wallet, but your mental and emotional wellness also. A few years ago I began getting irritated by all the clothes that still had tags on them in the closet. Shoes, especially tennis shoes, that I forgot about because I had too many options or my lifestyle just didn’t provide me the opportunities to get a good wear out of all I had. It pains me to talk about the amount of half used makeup I threw out because I had too much or it was sitting for too long.

I took my own advice after looking around my home and seeing money laying around and wasted.

That’s when the lightbulb went off. The first step in getting to a great place mentally and emotionally is going bare. I began selling clothes and shoes that I didn’t wear. If I had’t worn it in a year I was selling it. If I forgot I had it, I sold it. Let’s get to know me and heal me without all this “stuff”. It’s an amazing feeling. No distractions, you making some money on the side, and learning to be comfortable as you are.

Don’t let social media keep broke or make you go broke. Use it for inspiration, ideas, and entertainment. But just like they do, use a filter and get rid of the excess. Be well!!!

RosalynLynn

Be you so you can be free.

HARVEST CONFIDENCE THIS FALL

By definition harvest means the process or period of gathering crops. Through our daily habits, self care activities, and wellness journey we harvest confidence. Planting the proper seeds for our mental, emotional, and physical health will give us the strong confidence needed to sustain this thing called life. Harvesting and planting the proper seeds are important because confidence isn’t a one and done. Confidence is a muscle we must water and exercise daily.

Plant seeds of boundaries within you. I don’ t mean cutting people off. If that’s necessary then do so. But I’ve learned to tell people (meaning family members) don’t call me talking about another family member. When they text how is so and so doing, I don’t even respond to that text. Now, when they text me and ask me how the kids are doing I’ll respond. If someone needs a ride and I have plans, I’ll let them know I have plans I can take you when I’m done. It’s more about not stretching yourself thin to the point you’re burned out.

Another thing I do, throughout the day, take a break. Plant seeds of permission to yourself to take a break. Yes, a day off is good. Vacations are good. Lazy days are good. However, small breaks daily can become more beneficial and effective. During the day at work, if I notice I’ve been going since I sat down at the computer, I’ll stop, and give myself a mental break. Get up. Step outside. Go to the bathroom. Get a snack or something to drink. Most importantly I’ll read a good passage. My go to for this is Hallmarks mahogany.com. The community writing group is amazing.

Plant seeds of protection. If I don’t want to do something or go somewhere I’ll say no. I no longer do so just to keep the peace. So often I’d say yes because I didn’t want them to think I was an ungrateful person or rejecting them by rejecting their invitation.

A great seed to plant is a cutoff seed. Sometimes I can go all day and not realize I haven’t sat down or watched a program on TV. After several loads of laundry, cooking, and taking care of my family, I’ll tell them I’m done for the day. I’m going to do something for me. This prevents me feeling overwhelmed and burned out. 15 DAILY AFFIRMATIONS TO BOOST CONFIDENCE

Lastly, seeds of investing in self. My night time cap is very important to my mental health. It allows me to put a period on the day and have a clear mental space in the morning. Same with my morning routine. Getting ready, making sure I feel my best to present gives me confidence to walk in any room and offer my authentic self.

Harvesting and plating seeds to build confidence takes patience. Start within. What do you mentally and emotionally to feel confident. Most of the time once that happens it’ll spill to the outer.

This fall plant you some seeds of confidence. The confidence you build will give you the motivation and inspiration to go after what you’re afraid to do right now.

RosalynLynn

Be you so you can be free.