mental health · Personal Growth · Self care · Spiritual Health

CHANGE

C-Choose you. Make yourself a priority. Whatever you’ve been doing that isn’t working for you, change it, and do the opposite to begin living for you.

H-Heal your open wounds. What you didn’t get when you were a child know its not your fault and give it to yourself now. Whatever hurt and pain you’re carrying free yourself from it and don’t let it keep holding you hostage from living the life you deserve and want. We can’t change what happened but we can learn and grow from it.

A-Achieve one goal this year. Begin with setting out to make one goal and work on that until you have achieved it. Change doesn’t happen in a finger snap, take baby steps until your courage and confidence builds.

N-Now is the time. If we always say next time, the time will never come. Things begin to change when we take action and do something.

G-Growth is a process. It takes us on twists and turns we didn’t expect. Embrace the journey and process. Change is uncomfortable, but thats how you know you’re growing.

E-Eliminate the negative talk about yourself. Be good to yourself, especially in your head and what you say to yourself. We know its very easy to pick out something we don’t like about ourselves, change that and point out all the goodness in you.

RosalynLynn

Be you so you can be free.

Mental Health · Personal Growth · Self care

Are You A People Pleaser?

The most important thing for people to remember is they are enough the way God made them. They are unique and no else on this earth can be them no matter how hard they try. With knowing that we have people walking around living their life pleasing others while they suffer. Some are admitted people pleasers and others are in denial or just don’t know.

If you have to give up an arm, leg, and your big toe for others to want you to play with them in their sand box then they aren’t worth it. You don’t have to over extend or prove that you’re worthy. You being you is enough.

If you find yourself constantly apologizing even when you haven’t did anything or no one said anything then you need to stop. This means apologizing to your mate, friends, coworkers and even strangers. Apologizing isn’t going to make them like you more and doesn’t excuse their behavior towards you.

If you find you the one always volunteering your time and money specifically when no one else wants to then you need to stop it. Just because you are willing to lose sleep, time with your family, or spend your hard earned money doesn’t mean they are going to accept you for who you are. They are only going to continue to use you up dry.

If you never say no or always go with the flow then you need to stop it. Just because they invite you doesn’t mean they generally want you there. If you can’t give any input or suggestions on what you’re going to part take in and go anyway then you need to stop it. Most of the time they want you there to do the work they don’t want to.

I know it could be easier said than done but taking small baby steps builds your confidence more and more. You’ll begin to feel good that you stuck up for yourself. Yes those who are use to you giving in will be angry but they’ll either respect you creating boundaries or move on. With that decision you’ll know if they were really there for a true relationship with you.

RosalynLynn

Be you so you can be free.

mental health · Personal Growth · Self care · Spiritual Health

LOVE

L-Laugh a lot. It’s true what they say, laughter is the best medicine. Laugh at yourself most importantly. Love yourself enough to poke fun of yourself.

O-Open yourself up to the impossible. Keep your mind, heart, and ears open to learn new things. We can experience love from many people, places, and things.

V-Vulnerability isn’t a sign of weakness. It shows character, strength, courage, and allows others to connect with you on a deeper level. We love more, deeper, and connect when we let our guard down.

E-Extend a helping hand. One of the purist acts of love is lifting someone up.

RosalynLynn

Be you so you can be free.

Mental Health · Personal Growth · Self care

Self Care: 4 Mental Health Tips

There are many factors that play into the downfall of our mental and emotional health. So many circumstances from family, to work, to relationships, to past experiences and the list can go on for days. But there are some things we do on a daily that contribute to giving others the power of draining our emotional tank.

Stop Explaining Yourself

This is my biggest pet peeve when I see adult women specifically, crushing themselves trying to explain what they doing, where they going, why they chose to go left instead of right, and anything else. It’s even worse when they begin explaining without anyone even asking. Which that’s the first sign of someone not being confident in who they are. To be honest even if someone asked you, you still don’t owe anyone an explanation. If how you move about your life needs to be explained then they’re not on your level because if they were they would already know. The decisions you make for you and your family is no one else’s business as long as it doesn’t effect them.

Wasting Your Time Staying Angry

They were never lying when they said it takes a lot of energy to get angry and most importantly stay angry. It takes so much emotional energy to stay angry that people not only empty their tank but everyone else around them. Let just say when a wife gets mad at her husband the entire mood in the house shifts until she starts talking to him again. Even the kids start walking around on egg shells. You waste time that could be spent doing something productive. Not to mention when you stay that angry for some time you begin to not sleep well, which makes things worse and continue to spiral. At this point every thing including your physical body and beautiful face begin to suffer. It just isn’t worth it. Remember they hurt you once, don’t let them keep hurting you by staying angry. That would be giving away too much power.

Living Your Life for Others

When we allow others to influence our decisions we have given them the keys to drive our life. Letting someone tell you “you’re not ready”, “I don’t think that’s a good idea”, or “don’t you think you should wait a while“ are people that you need to keep at arms length. Those are all manipulative, controlling, and selfish ways people get you to do what they want you to do. Be confident in your journey to know what’s best for you and don’t let anyone convince you otherwise. Making decisions to please others leaves you as the only one suffering. No matter what you try to do nothing is going to make you happy until you live for you.

Staying in a One Sided Relationship

Having hopes and expectation for someone will get us every time. Also knowing the potential a person could have is the most common reason we constantly give so many chances to those who don’t deserve it. It’s true, when people show you who they are believe them. If the relationship makes you question who you are, what you do, or you always seem to be in a confused state then its time to leave. Our relationships should inspire us to be better people. We should feel so much love and support that we have to constantly give it away to others. With no respect, trust, or communication you’re wasting your time. This goes for our romantic relationship as well as our friendships.

These are simple practices that will save us heartache in our daily lives. The amount time spent worrying if someone understands us, feel we care, or sparing their feelings only wastes our time and drain our mental and emotional tank on empty.

They aren’t worth it.

RosalynLynn

Be you so you can be free.

mental health · Personal Growth · Self care · Spiritual Health

FEAR

F-Finish what you started. Turn that thought into ideas to create a plan. Develop those ideas into a project. Design that project into a business. Whatever “it” is that you started or thought about starting FINISH it. It could be school, moving, weight loss goal, changing your hair color, or anything that was placed upon your heart.

E-Explore the world. When we travel and learn about different cultures it allows us to see life differently. It doesn’t have to be overseas, travel to a city or small town you never been to. What do they eat? Where does the dialect come from? We will have a better understanding of people. Of course right now staying safe and healthy is important.

A-Award yourself regularly. It doesn’t have to be something big. But we know you have a family and other responsibilities to take care of, however you should enjoy the fruits of your labor. Each time you get paid do something for yourself.

R-Release any tension, frustration, or aniety you may have. Find a way to let go of what was, what hurt you, or who made you mad. Holding on to that continues to hurt you not them. LET IT GO!!!!

RosalynLynn

Be you so you can be free.

Mental Health · Personal Growth · Self care

Happy Birthday to Me!!!!!

So today is my birthday and for the first time since I was a teenager I am speaking out about it. My typical attitude towards my birthday was to not say anything or even attempt to celebrate it. I’ve never been one of those that begin the week before reminding everyone its my birthday and to plan a week long festivities. When people would ask what you want for your birthday I would blow it off and not even acknowledge they are trying to acknowledge me.

I’ve always chosen to keep my birthday for me. I’ve used my birthday as a day to be with myself mostly mentally and emotionally to kind of reflect and use it as a day to set goals.

Last year I made the decision by my next birthday I was going to be in a better place, mentally and emotionally, and would have made progress in living in who I truly wanted to be. I began speaking aloud what I wanted to accomplish by this year’s birthday and what do you know, I’ve made huge milestones. To be perfectly honest with you guys that is the best gift in the world.

Most importantly I began being truly honest to myself in how I was feeling about my professional 8-5 career and what I wanted it to look like. I always had this vision in my mind and in my heart for years but never nurtured it. Once I began to nurture who I was on the inside I was feeling lighter and lighter as the days went on and feeling more free. Each step of the way I became more confident, encouraged, and motivated to continue on my journey of living the life that had been stifled inside of me.

I noticed I began saying more often “by the time I’m 40” I am going to be here, doing this, and have this accomplished. No I’m not 40, I turned 39 today, and yes I’m proud to say my age, but the goals I set for my 40th I know I’m on the right path.

I say all of this to say if you’re one that gets down because your birthday is coming celebrate yourself and how far you’ve come. It’s your day and you get to spend it however you like. It’s never too late to hit the reset button. You can change the course of your life’s direction and be happy. Just because it’s what you’ve always done or the safest doesn’t mean its the best or right thing for you.

Finally it doesn’t have to be your birthday for you to celebrate yourself or reflect. You can do it every day and don’t feel guilty about it.

RosalynLynn

Be you so you can be free.

Healthy Lifestyle · Mental Health · Personal Growth · Self care

Self Care: Hobbies and Activities

We all have that one thing that makes us smile, calms us when we are angry, and won’t get tired doing. It could be collecting something, sewing or knitting, or having a hobby like drawing or gardening.

Well for me my “thing” is makeup. I can sit and watch video after video on makeup tutorials. I can wonder the aisles of the store for hours examining the shade range, packaging, scent, names of products, and anything in between.

For me though it isn’t about the makeup itself, it’s about the action of purchasing it, taking it home, and trying it out in many different ways to see how I look. The look or outcome of the makeup is always beautiful but thats when I lose my enjoyment. I enjoy the application process of it. It’s something about me blending foundation, applying mascara, and putting on lipstick that makes me feel good. The thought that I’m taking the time to enhance my beauty or see how different I would look with certain products is liberating, fulfilling, and makes me smile on the inside.

What’s your thing? Don’t ever be afraid to tell someone what your pass time is. That is what makes you unique. That is your gift. Something you are great at, constantly find ways to get better , educate yourself on, and never get tired doing that is you.

Most of the time we don’t realize our “thing” is what we need to tap into to fulfill ourselves.

RosalynLynn

Be you so you can be free.

Mental Health · Personal Growth · Spiritual Health

DREAM

D-Declare and claim whatever it is you are hoping for, working towards, or desire. Speak as if its already happened.

R-Radiate the energy you want to receive. The vibes and positive energy you put out will come back to you. Just think, when we smile at someone and make eye contact they smile back.

E-Establish your goals, strategy, and plan for your life. Create a calendar, vision board, or journal to keep it as a visual reminder.

A-Affirm yourself everyday. Multiple times a day. Don’t wait on anyone to tell you how fabulous you are.

M-Master the art of being unbothered. When we run our own race and stay in our lane we don’t have the time or energy to be worried about others.

RosalynLynn

Be you so you can be free.

Mental Health · Personal Growth · Self care · Spiritual Health

Experience the Power of Being Still

Phones ringing, fax machine ringing and spitting out paper, clients walking in, meeting at the next desk with coworkers, papers on your desk, sticky notes, agendas, files, balancing the books, have to go to the bathroom, husband texting you what’s for dinner, school emailing you regarding re-entry plan, and you just ran out of coffee. Welp that was a day in my 8-5. I’m going to backtrack and say that was happening before lunch time even came.

I have experienced this scene more than once in my professional career. With all that chaos going on around you while you’re trying to be productive, do your job, and focus. That could be difficult for anyone. What usually end up happening is the rest of your day you’re equilibrium is off. There is this unsettling feeling on the inside, you can’t calm your nerves, or focus on anything the rest of day.

You get in the car drive home and begin to think back of that moment in time when the office was crazy and say “what happened?” How many times have you been in a situation to where nothing was said to you, done to you, meant for you, or about you but because everyone else in the office was in an uproar you became out of sync with your being.

After experiencing this more than once I vowed to not ever get myself worked up over nothing. Just because coworkers are having a “moment” and venting to me I wasn’t going to let it effect me again. I didn’t like the way I felt driving home and when my husband would ask “why are you on edge?” I wouldn’t have an answer.

Fast forward to present day, and that chaotic office scene occurred again. “The power of being still”. That is what I said when I was walking to my car with the biggest smile from ear to ear. I’m pretty sure the folks driving by thought I was crazy for grinning so hard. First thing I did was detach myself from everyone. I remained focus on what I was doing, didn’t feed any negative energy that they were attempting to serve, and remained quiet. This allowed me to stay calm and be present in myself. There were even times I was able to chuckle at the commotion that was going on.

I felt as light as a feather after the dust settled . I was screaming Hallelujah!!!!!! that I had the ability to center myself. As usual, you find it really didn’t need all that to solve a problem or get done what needed to be done. That not only works in the professional world but in everyday life. There is so much power in remaining still. Don’t get so riled up that you won’t be able to make a decision, complete something, or miss out because you have lost focus. Then have hindsight looking back realizing it wasn’t what it was cracked up to be.

There is power in being still.

RosalynLynn

Be you so you can be free.

Healthy Lifestyle · Personal Growth · Self care

Self Care: Declutter and Make Room for Growth

Right now we live in a world where more is better. We’ve come addicted to having “stuff”. One for sure way to get yourself lost is surrounding yourself with an abundance of “things” or making yourself believe you need more than you need.

I’ve heard the saying a person’s home or car is reflection of who they are. No I don’t mean if they have a messy car or home then they are nasty. Being nasty and just having stuff laying around is two different things.

If you get a ride from someone and they have to clean the seat off for you to sit down then thats how they run their life. In most cases they are always in a rush or just barely making it to work or appointments on time. Even though they have a phone they probably missed the reminder or because their life is so sporadic they didn’t even set a reminder.

When you walk into a person home and if just seems like they have stuff everywhere with no meaning or purpose then that is a reflection of them. They may feel like they have to hold on to things and sometimes its hard for them to get rid of “stuff.” Holding on to trinkets for memories sometimes hold us back from moving on from things that has happened in the past.

If you find you look around and see stuff collecting dust, you don’t use it, or you haven’t wore a certain piece of clothing in a while then get rid of it. Most of the time once we declutter our home, our minds begin to open up. Getting rid of old stuff that doesn’t serve a purpose make room for something else to come into your life that have meaning.

Go through the closet and get rid of those old clothes and shoes that are out dated. You haven’t wore them in forever and saving for a “just in case” event is holding you back. If that event hasn’t come by now then you don’t need it. Most often when that “just in case event” comes you’ll probably go out and purchase something new.

When we declutter our home we renew mind and our new thoughts, ideas come to the forefront. Our creativity is refreshed and we get a new sense of purpose, our confidence is renewed, and we have motivation to push through whatever has been holding us back.

Purging old meaningless things allows us to let go of the past and move on. Holding on keeps us bound to certain events and things that happened to us. Decluttering gives you power to say I’m not going to live in the past and be stuck.

If you’re ready to grow, move on from the past, and renew your spirit get rid of the old and make room for new beginnings.

RosalynLynn

Be you so you can be free.