We’re 15 days into the new year and it seems it’s been a long one already. There is so much going on around the world, in our homes, and on our jobs that can easily get us into the state of “How in the world did I end up here?”
Right now more than ever taking a moment to ourself is crucial to all of our wellbeing. Even if you can get five minutes in, it’s better than none. Turn the news off, do not consume that all day. Turn off your social media notifications for a day or so. If you feel you can’t turn off your notifications just don’t respond, read, or look at them for a day.
Please be mindful of what you’re consuming and how much. This includes your conversations with family, friends, and coworkers. If you have someone at work like I do, who loves to talk about politics every moment of day, find a way to recenter. For me, I either completely ignore them, turn on my radio really low, and zone out. Eventually when I don’t respond or engage they stop or switch the subject. Another way I deflect is to simply say “I’ve had my fair share of politics I’m really not interested in discussing it right now.” Finally, my last resort, is to literally refer the conversation back work or another subject.
That goes for any subject matter that you are tired of talking about or hearing about.
Another thing that has been heavy on me is to ask yourself what are you condoning, participating, accepting, and accommodating? Right now there are many things that we normalize and gloss over as if its ok, knowing deep down it’s not. Stop twisting yourself into a pretzel, to keep the peace in fear of being left out and talked about.
If it ain’t right, don’t sit well in your spirit, and you don’t want to, then exist gracefully.
I’ve had to come to grips with this subject matter this week. Unfortunately, my mother in law passed away, and me knowing my role on when, where, and how far to extend my support had to become clear to me. I had to step back and say it’s not my mother, my husband has siblings, and I don’t have a say so. I had to tell my husband I’m here, you all let me know what you want and need me to do. I was beginning to struggle on if I was being a good wife, if I didn’t do or be apart of certain situations. But I had to realize my support is to my husband and my children, who lost their grandmother.
Finally, I come to know and understand that I can’t fix people or save people. I can’t and will not break myself down trying to fix someone else. Also if it has nothing to do with you, it doesn’t concern you, it’s none of your business, it doesn’t effect you or your family, it’s out of your control, or you can’t change it, then let it GO. Don’t be mad, angry, upset, bitter, or hold a grudge. Just be done and let go. And don’t look back.
Bet on yourself first, this one time, and give yourself a chance.
Be you so you can be free.