For the last year or so I’ve really come into an understanding of who I am, where I want to go, and live the life I want. As I become more comfortable on this journey and actually see my vision come to pass, there are so many things I wish I had done in my younger years. Below are just a few things I would tell my younger self.
live In the Moment
In my younger years I always dreamed about my future and what it would look like. When you’re young the only thing you can think about is getting out your mothers house and living the life you want. But I now know literally enjoy each day and what that day has to bring. Yesterday was old news and anything that happened can’t be changed and tomorrow simply isn’t promised. Worrying about what could happen will rob you of the laughter you could have today. Stressing about yesterday keeps you stuck in the past. Most of the time what we’re worrying about is a made up scenario that we’ve created and typically situations always pan out the complete opposite of what we thought.
Always Go with Your Gut
When you’re younger the only goal you have is to make your family proud. That means we make decisions that go against our true desires. While its good to value their opinion and want their support, living the life that’s fulfilling to you would make them more proud to support you. Sacrificing our happiness to please others will fill us with a sense of resentment, anger, and emptiness. That creates another situation because we begin to blame them for “putting” us in that situation.
Whatever Other’s Think About You, Let Them Think It
I’ve come to understand what other’s criticisms of me are has nothing to do with me and is none of my business. With knowing that, it makes it easy to not take it personally. If we focus on what people say about how we should live our lives we would be a ball of mess. The most important thing to remember here is everyone is going to have an opinion. And yes, of course, it’s easier said than done to ignore some harsh criticisms, but remembering they’re projecting their own insecurities will help you brush it off every time. “I walk my journey and take the paths I want, if you want to go a certain path then you can take it on your own journey.”
Don’t Be Afraid to Try Something New
One of the best pieces advice I carry with me is “never fit in, always stand out.” I firmly believe in expanding my horizons, trying something that is out of the ordinary, or taking risks that aren’t common. I love taking a risk because I learn something new about myself each time. Challenging myself and taking a risk increase my confidence, self esteem, and courage to know even if I fall I know I’m going to get back up. It doesn’t have to be something big. You can start small. If I see everyone is buying the same shoes or everyone is going for a certain color, I purposely choose the one color no one wants. It’s scary to put yourself out there on a limb but remember you already starting off strong by having the courage to stand alone.
Let the Chips Fall How They May
Trying to control everything in every situation does nothing but raise your blood pressure. Its impossible to try to control everything and we really shouldn’t. Some situations are better left to pan out how they are suppose to not how we want them to. Often times we work ourselves into a frenzy when how we thought a situation would go, it completely went in the opposite direction. Most often worked out better than we thought.
Don’t Do Anything If You Don’t Want To
“If Ros don’t want to do it, then Ros don’t have to.” My father told me that when I was a teenager and that has stuck with me since. So often we do things and make decisions because we don’t want to hurt someone’s feelings or we are guilted into something. We then resent and harvest anger at a person when all because we didn’t have the courage to say “No”. We can easily eliminate putting ourselves in uncomfortable positions by saying no thank you.
I’m pretty sure there are many more notes I would give to my younger self but these are the points I use daily on my walk.
Be free so you can be free.