WHAT I’VE LEARNED THIS YEAR ABOUT MYSELF

As we approach the middle of March, I’m having thoughts of what happened just a year ago. What I’ve learned about myself and my personal growth this year has been obvious, to me. This pandemic has been a blessing in disguise if you seek the positive. Yes, there are some positive things we can pull from this year. I’ve even said to my kids “you know guys at this time last year when ya’ll went on spring break, you never returned.”

At this time last year, we all went through a lot. I’ve said in a previous post the same time we went into quarantine both of our vehicles were totaled due to a severe hail storm. I remember when the storm happened we felt completely deflated and had no idea what we were going to do. My husband and I looked at each other and said “welp, we just going to take it day by day.” Which leads me to five lessons on what I’ve learned this year about myself:

Slow Down

You’ve heard me say it before over this past year, that God sent a clear message he wanted us to slow down, live in the moment, and enjoy the families He gifted us with. Being constantly busy doesn’t mean you’re living. In actuality, especially children, want you home and available. Children want that structure and disciplined home even if they don’t seem like they want it. Just sitting and being with one another is more valuable than anything. Those are the memorable moments that will be talked about years from now. Create moments.

Make Myself A Priority

As a mom and wife I’ve been guilty of putting myself on the back burner to ensure they are taken care of and have everything they need. Along with taking care of myself, I had to get over feeling bad about it. This year I quickly got over that feeling of guilt. Now I make it a point to watch a tv program, get a spa treatment, take care of my hair and nails, and treat myself. Honestly, thats what my husband and kids would want me to do.

Ask For What You Want

Another hard lesson for us all, is to ask for what I want and not be shy about it. Have you ever compromised or blatantly not said what you really wanted? But you see someone else get exactly what they want and then you get upset with them? What I’ve learned this year is to not compromise myself at the expense of someone else. This is very difficult for many of us. When someone asks you what you want, say unapologetically what it is you want or need. They are asking you for a reason and we owe it to ourselves as well as the person asking to be honest

Protect My Mental and Emotional Wellbeing

This year I’ve really been consistent and good at identifying what’s good for my mental health and what triggers me. Protecting my peace and calmness has been a major priority and focus. To do so, I had to not feel bad or worry about hurting others feelings in the process. I am no longer afraid or shy to exit a situation or place to prevent it from raising my blood pressure. Therefore I haven’t been as tense and on edge.

Career and Financial Goals

The last thing that has become clear is my career and financial goals that I’d like to achieve. For the first time this year, I’ve verbally stated aloud what I’d like to do in the near future career wise. Side Note: I will share my career goal when I reach it, I’m a firm believer in not sharing until it has manifested. Financially, I’ve become diligent in educating myself to ensure we are as financially responsible and financially literate as we can be.

There is no doubt that we all had a life lesson this year, some good and some bad. No matter where you may fall, we all can learn something. It’s very important to reflect and see how far you’ve come. Reflecting can provide direction, clarity, and understanding. What has this past year taught you about yourself?

RosalynLynn

Be you so you can be free.

Your Prayers Were Answered The First Time

Have you ever prayed for something and felt like you’ve been waiting for a while or it was never answered? Because we humans are emotional creatures, many times our prayers have been answered but we’re too in our head to realize it.

This lightbulb just went off for me recently. For many years I constantly said to myself and others I didn’t want a 9-5, Monday thru Friday job. The thought of doing the same thing over and over again, having no time during the week to handle business, and essentially a weekend that‘s non existent was something I wasn’t interested in.

Welp, I ate those words. Now don’t get me wrong I love being in the professional world, contributing to an office, and using what I’ve learned and went to school for. Balancing books, spreadsheets, financial reports, and budgets makes my heart flutter. However, I had so many other interest I wanted to pursue.

Recently I was honest with myself and husband in saying I no longer wanted to do a 9-5 because I wanted to pursue some other ventures. I knew I could pursue my gifts whilst making sure my family didn’t feel any effects financially.

Pre COVID-19 my attitude and emotions toward my professional job changed. I enjoy what I do, however staying until 5PM was beginning to weigh on me. I began feeling like my time was better suited at home taking care of my kids, husband, home, and personal ventures. Yes, many others would love to sit idle and make “free” money. So often I would tell family and friends I feel unproductive and I’m wasting time by sitting here.

They would respond in telling me that it’s easy, free money. Well I wasn’t happy just sitting there doing nothing knowing deep down my mind was elsewhere. So my happiness and eagerness every morning dwindled as time went on.

Now COVID-19 had come and the world went to a shut down but we continued to work through it. I was given the pleasure to choose what shift I wanted because only one person could be in the office at a time. Well that was a nice gift right there but I couldn’t receive it as a gift at that time. So anyway, I chose the 7am-1pm shift. I am a morning person. I was excited to have time to work, take care of my family, home and still have time to pursue what I wanted.

I fell in love with this shift and after weeks into the months I couldn’t envision myself going back to a nine hour day. I remember standing in my kitchen telling my husband I would love to stay on this shift because I was seeing my vision for the life I wanted to live begin to form.

Well literally God answered my prayers with in a week. My boss came to me with a proposition of remaining part time on my shift so he can bring back an old friend full time. When he approached me I felt insulted and unappreciated because he used the fact that I valued being a mom to get what he wanted. All the while it was what I wanted as well. Because it was packaged in old wrinkly wrapping paper with no bow I didn’t realize the amazing gift that was being handed to me.

Needless to say I felt every emotion. How dare he to proposition me like that. Mind you I just told my husband I wanted to stay on this shift of 7-1. So I reluctantly agreed and instantly went into my feelings.

I was angry that I was doing a full time job on part time hours. While the other person enjoy doing nothing. Remember what I said a little while ago, about how being there until 5pm, I felt like I was wasting time.

Eventually duties began getting taken away and they let it be known their preference on who they wanted to handle certain duties. Once again I’m in my feelings y’all. Because these gifts aren’t being wrapped in pretty packaging with bows I wasn’t realizing God was giving me the shift I wanted, taking away duties so I wouldn’t feel like I was doing another person job, and answering my Prayers.

Now school has started and I need to be available before and after school. Well I was once again given the gift of “let me know when you want to come in and what hours you want to work”.

No joke I literally make my schedule and work how many hours I want. At one point I was given a compliment of how I get more work done in 5 hours than a normal person does in 8 hours. I was grateful for the compliment but because these gifts I was “given” was wrapped in old paper I couldn’t fully appreciate it.

Because they would say things like, you’ve got us to a good place but we want her to handle it now, I felt some type of way. Or, you really good at what you do, but she knows how I like things done. Then I got, if you ever want to go back full time let me know because you come first. All the while I was thinking, if I’m your first priority, why are you choosing someone else over me? This was God giving me exactly what I wanted. When I spoke to my husband that day in the kitchen, God heard my cry, and delivered.

God was answering my prayers, while polishing my character and making me stronger. Letting me know, it’s not always going to be pretty. Trust in the Lord and His Will shall be done.

OMG!!! I am blessed and had to look back to see how every prayer was answered. I literally got everything I asked for. I love being a mom and wife, taking care of the house and making sure they have the time, energy, and love they need to succeed. I also love having the ability to pursue my interests and hobbies that makes me, Me. I love being able to work outside the home and provide.

Guys this has taught me to get out my head and get out my feelings because if not I would’ve missed or even lost some blessings. Just because things aren’t answered how we want them to, when we want them to be answered, and who we want God to use doesn’t mean that our prayers isn’t answered.

God hears you the first time. And so it shall be.

RosalynLynn

Be you so you can be free.

FORGIVE For Your Mental Health

F-Forgive yourself first. Forgive yourself for everything you are feeling guilty about or regret. Whatever you said, done, allowed, ignored, or encouraged forgive yourself. Forgiveness is for you not them. Remember why you’re worried and losing sleep they are enjoying life while you carry this useless burden. Forgiving doesn’t mean you agree or you aren’t remorseful, it simply frees you and allows you to move forward.

O-Overthinking ruins your mental and emotional wellness. Overthinking also ruins our relationships, keeps us in our head, effects our ability to be productive at work, and our everyday life is greatly compromised. Trust yourself, make your decision, and forgive.

R-Regrets are useless. We can’t take back what was said or done. We can’t get time back either. The best thing to do is apologize if the misunderstanding was on our behalf, understand why it was hurtful, and grow the relationships from there. If the misunderstanding was on the other side, express why you were hurt, if they apologize, great kiss and makeup. However, if they don’t that’s even better, because when we express to someone how they hurt us and they don’t apologize, they have let us know how we show up in their life. Forgive them anyway, and have a relationship at arms length.

G-Grudges effect you not the other person. Holding a grudge is like a kid constantly picking the scab off. The road to healing and forgiveness is prolonged. Also you are the one spending time and energy going out of your way trying to stay angry and thus making excuses for why you’re staying angry. Your sleep, eating habits, daily life, and wellness is all effected by holding a grudge.

I-Interrupt the bad or negative patterns of behaviors. We talk about what we want to do so much sometimes you just have to “get off the pot or piss” as my mom says. Stop talking about it and do it. That negative talk about yourself or others for that fact, interrupt the pattern in mid sentence. Bad sleeping habits, eating habits, language, or anything that you want to stop or get better with just take the leap and start. Forgive yourself for letting so much time go by.

V-Victories are won when we let go and forgive. It’s a victory for everyone. The tension is released, everyone is smiling and feel like themselves again. Benefitting from forgivenesses stop us from walking on eggshells. The muscles in our jaws are relaxed, the wrinkles in our foreheads are smoothed, and we’ve loosen the lips. Our frown has turned into a smile and we can show our beautiful faces again.

E-Express yourself some way. Show your personality in art, fashion, music, writing, dancing, makeup or whatever you love. While we’re shy or thinking people may talk about us for being us, that is the one thing others need to see about us. You never know who you may inspire or how free you may become. The more colorful, wierd, or extreme it is the better. Do it unapologetically. How To Use Creativity To Boost Your Mental Health

RosalynLynn

Be you so you can be free.

FAITH

F-Freshen yourself up. It’s amazing what a new haircut, outfit, new makeup, or facial will do. When we spend time on ourselves, it gives us a new look and confidence that we need to put some spunk in us.

A-Attract what you want. We are what we attract. That is in friendships, romantic relationships, finances, positive vibes, and in your spirit.

I-Increase the love you give yourself and others. FORGIVE For Your Mental Health

T-Talk and tell others how you feel. If we don’t express how we feel then our loved ones won’t know we need their ear, heart, conversation, and love.

H-Hope fuels faith. Always hope for the best. Even when things don’t pan out how you wanted them to or right away, having hope leaves us with the expectation that everything is going to be alright.

RosalynLynn

Be you so you can be free.

LOVE YOURSELF

L-Laugh a lot. It’s true what they say, laughter is the best medicine. Laugh at yourself most importantly. Love yourself enough to poke fun of yourself.

O-Open yourself up to the impossible. Keep your mind, heart, and ears open to learn new things. We can experience love from many people, places, and things.

V-Vulnerability isn’t a sign of weakness. It shows character, strength, courage, and allows others to connect with you on a deeper level. We love more, deeper, and connect when we let our guard down.