FOOD FOR THOUGHT: WHAT’S THE ALTERNATIVE?

As I jump in to create the life I want to live, I like everyone else, have fears, hesitations, and questions. But as I do get the courage and take risks, it becomes easier each time. That led me to a little food for thought. I always ask myself, if you don’t take the risk, then what’s the alternative?

The answer is simple. Either I take the risk and follow my heart. Follow the dreams and desires that is burning inside me. And, lastly, do what God tells me to do. On the other hand, I can continue to sit, make excuses, and wonder about all the what ifs.

We never know what’s on the other side of fear. If we take a risk and stumble, so what. We’re still alive to take what we learned and try something new. Even when we stumble, there is a lesson there. It’s how we get to the path we’re trying to get to.

If we don’t take action for what we desire, then we will never get to the life we truly desire to live. No one else can live our life for us. MENTAL HEALTH: YOU ALREADY HAVE BEEN VALIDATED

When I first began my blog, I was terrified. I went back and forth so many times. But one day, I literally said forget it, and jumped on my IPAD and downloaded wordpress. I mean, this was something that had been burning inside me for years. It wasn’t going away. What was my alternative? Always wondering or questioning how far I could be. Every time I hear a quote or someone speak it would spark something in me. Then I’d have to supress it. Worrying about what people would say won’t make the blog happen.

I had this crazy idea of wanting multiple streams of income and being a freelancer was always something I knew I could succeed at. Thinking about the what ifs, didn’t add money to my bank account. The what ifs didn’t postpone my desire to become a freelancer. Time didn’t stop and wait on me. Until one day, I said forget it, I’m going to do it.

Is it a learning process and experience? Absolutely!!!!!!! What’s your alternative? There isn’t a such thing as the perfect time. We will never have everything lined up perfectly how we want. Trying to get all your ducks in a row will only have you saying the same thing next year.

Sometimes we just have to follow what’s in our hearts and let God do the rest. I promise He won’t leave you. If he led you to it, then He’ll bring you through it. Trust God and Trust yourself.

So if you find yourself frozen with fear, ask yourself ”what’s the alternative?” What would happen if you don’t do it? Will it go away? Postponing living for you isn’t going to make the time go by faster. Nor will it stop the desires of your heart.

Whatever it is that you want to do start it today. Fill out the application. Create you an account. Post your first item or listing to sell. Call and inquire about what you need to do that project. Contact your bank to see what options are available to you. YOU CAN DO IT!!!!!!

What’s the alternative?

Be well on your journey.

RosalynLynn

Be you so you can be free.

9 DAILY FEMININE SELF CARE HABITS TO MAKE YOU FEEL GOOD

As I’ve matured, I own and relish in the fact that I’m high maintenance. High maintenance in a good way. There are some feminine daily self care habits I do without even blinking. These habits make me feel good on the inside, keeps me motivated, and helps with my confidence as I tackle the day.

These 9 daily habits ensure I’m always ready no matter what happens, I’m presentable, yet comfortable, and I can put my best foot forward. In no particular order here are 9 daily feminine self care habits for a good day. Daily Self Care Habits To Boost Your Mental Health

Apply Perfume Daily
Now I used to be one that wasn’t a perfume girl. However, a couple spritz of perfume gives you the confidence to know you are smelling good all day. It wakens your senses and gives you confidence to stand in your sexiness.

Moisturize
Specifically body lotion. Without question after showering applying lotion is a must. I met many women who say they don’t do it everyday. Applying lotion not only keeps your skin moisturized, but it’s the number way to keep your skin youthful looking. Any kind of skin concerns, a good lotion will help. Having a nice soft body and skin, gives you permission to feel feminine and sexy.

Lip Gloss
Moisturize those lips. Keep those lips exfoliated and moisturized. Even if you don’t wear lip stick or lip gloss, chap stick is still a ladies essential. Moisturized lips keeps my lips plumped and adds shine to your smile.

Comb Your Hair Daily
Seems like a no brainer. But taking 5 minutes to brush your hair instantly boost your self esteem. You care enough about you, to say I’m going to brush my hair back. It doesn’t have to be anything extravagant, but at least when UPS knocks, you look cute.

Clothes That Fit
Just because you aren’t going anywhere or its the weekend doesn’t mean you have to be in baggy clothes all day. There are some amazing brands that sell comfy clothes that accentuate your body. While lounging around, cooking, and cleaning give yourself permission to look sexy. It does something to us mentally when we are wearing our husbands hoodies all day. Every time you walk pass a mirror you feel like Blah. Thats not our goal or what we want.

Simple Piece of Dainty Jewelry
I’ve made it a habit to wear a piece of jewelry everyday. This took me a while, but the shine and sparkle it gives on your skin is another instant confidence booster. You look good and feel good at the same time. That will motivate you to do anything. Some small earrings of course. But add a dainty bracelet or necklace.

Matching Underwear
Now this is tricky. If you can’t match your underwear everyday, then make sure they are cute everyday. No matter what we do, everything starts behind the scenes or internal. You have every right to look good and feel sexy for yourself. If you don’t feel it, then no one else will.

Oral Hygiene
Make sure we are taking care of our teeth and gums. Floss and brushing at least twice a day. I’m late to the party but I’ve been loving this Water Pik. I’ve noticed a huge difference in my oral health since incorporating it into my routine. Having a good fresh mouth and clean teeth gives you confidence when you go out.

Focus on Your Hands
I have dry skin, so applying lotion to my hands is something I do all day. Keep your hands moisturize and skin plump. I know when I don’t, my fingers look like dried up french fries because my fingers are so skinny already. In the event you have a meeting or need to shake someone hand you can do so confidently.

These are just a couple of girly things I do to keep myself confident. There isn’t anything wrong with being high maintenance. It’s all about what you perceive as high maintenance. As long as whatever you do makes you feel good.

Your self care habits doesn’t have to take an hour. Before you begin your day just spend 15 minutes with yourself making sure you look and feel good about yourself. That will set you up to have a great day.

RosalynLynn

Be you so you can be free.

THE HARD THING ABOUT BOUNDARIES

We’ve heard a million people say set boundaries. But setting boundaries isn’t the hard part. The hard thing about boundaries is keeping them and implementing said consequences if someone crosses a boundary.

I think we’ve all said we’re done with someone or a situation and even knew how we were going to handle it in the future. But when that next time came, we got cold feet. We second guess ourselves. The thought of cutting someone off, give us anxiety. We begin to worry about hurting their feelings. Especially if its a close friend or family member. We begin to question if we’re the one’s being too sensitive or overreacting. Having the guts or courage to let someone know they have hurt your feelings brings you embarrassment. You just don’t want to ruffle anyone’s feather. Or cause a scene. Be the person that ruins the dinner, holiday, or trip.

But guess what, that second guessing is what go us to this point. We know how we feel, we know what we need and want, but refuse to say it out of fear. What if you attempt to implement the consequences and it’s not received? The sad part is we are willing to continue to sacrifice our feelings to spare someone else’s. That’s not ok. Putting your feelings and boundaries first is a for sure way to demand respect in a respectful manner. It’s ok to tell others ”you’ve gone too far.”

The first thing to do when setting boundaries is to let them know if you do this, it makes me feel like this, and therefore I would have to do this to protect myself. Protect Your Peace And Energy Make it clear what the boundary is not to cross. Then be specific of what said consequence is for that boundary being crossed. That way when you do have to take action, it doesn’t come as a surprise.

Next, start with realistic consequences that you feel comfortable implementing and sticking to. As time goes on you’ll develop the confidence to be stronger. We often make the mistake of starting off big because we’re so angry but it sets us up to fall hard. Remember it’s just as equally emotional for you to even create said boundaries with certain people.

In your journey of healing and life, boundaries are necessary. Creating them is easy. But the hard thing about boundaries is implementing the consequence. Start at a place where you are confident to handle and make no apologies for. When setting and implementing boundaries we can’t get cold feet, a shaky voice, or apologize before doing it.

Be well on your journey.

RosalynLynn

Be you so you can be free.

HOLIDAY 2021 MOTIVATION: TAKE A MOMENT FOR YOURSELF

It’s the week of Christmas and everyone is running around frantic. This is a fun, exciting, and emotional week leading up to the big day. However, you, I, and everyone else must take a moment for ourselves. Don’t get so overwhelmed with what’s going on that you forget to breathe, look at yourself in the mirror, and just be. HOLIDAY 2021: 3 SIMPLE SELF CARE TIPS

acorn advent blur bright

Even if this moment is only five minutes. Take it with pleasure. A long bath or shower is always a good way to recoup and be in the moment. If going out window shopping is something you can do for yourself then do that. Go to your local coffee shop, and have a moment to think or not think about anything at all. A good way to be uninterrupted, is to go in the bathroom and close the door. People may thing you’re doing number 2, 🤷🏾‍♀️ but that’s ok. Thats the point.

Take a moment and call a friend to see how they are holding up during this time. We never know what people are going through. Sometimes helping others and being an ear for others, helps us as well. You get through things together.

Worry about what you can control and leave rest. Don’t stress yourself over anything. No matter what happens you can have a great holiday if you choose to. Furthermore, it will all work out how it suppose to.

Either way you are suppose to enjoy yourself as well. Yes, we are supposed to give and make others feel special, but you have permission to make yourself feel good as well. As you prepare to enjoy your holiday don’t forget to take a moment for yourself. You deserve it. You have the right to. Don’t let this holiday go by without you enjoying yourself.

Be Well!!!!!

Happy Holidays!!!!!! Merry Christmas!!!!!!

RosalynLynn

Be you so you can be free.

Favorite Iyanla Vanzant Quotes: MOTIVATIONAL AND INSPIRING

I love me a good quote. I have shared some of my favorite Iyanla Vanzant quotes below. I love her honesty and straight forward love. She gives it straight even if it’s hard to hear. A good quote is food for thought. Gives you a light bulb moment to shift your thought process into a different universe.

What Is Meant to Be, Will Be

If we celebrate, support, and nurture ourselves, we will not need anyone else to do it for us.” –Iyanla Vanzant

You have to meet people where they are, and sometimes you have to leave them there. –Iyanla Vanzant

The only way to get what you really want is to let go of what you don’t want.” –Iyanla Vanzant

Stop squeezing into places that don’t fit you.” –Iyanla Vanzant

You don’t get to tell people how to love you; you get to choose whether or not you want to participate in the way they love.” –Iyanla Vanzant

“If you don’t have a vision you’re going to be stuck in what you know. And the only thing you know is what you’ve already seen.“ –Iyanla Vanzant

If somebody had the privilege and the honor of walking into your life, living and growing with you, and they didn’t have the good sense to stay, you need to be glad to be rid of them.” –Iyanla Vanzant

We must inspire ourselves by believing we have the power to accomplish everything we set out to do.” –Iyanla Vanzant

There’s no GREATER battle in life than between the part of you that wants to be healed, and the part of you that’s content remaining BROKEN.” –Iyanla Vanzant

The journey into self-love and self acceptance must begin with self-examination…until you take the journey of self-reflection, it is almost impossible to grow or learn in life.” –Iyanla Vanzant

What does a quote do for you? To me it’s not just a quote or words, it gives me a different perspective and a new way of thinking. Seeing things through a different lens gives understanding and meaning to help you or allow you to help someone else.

RosalynLynn

Be you so you can be free.

HAPPY HUMP DAY!!! YOU’LL GET OVER THE HUMP

It’s hump day!!!! I tell my kids every Wednesday, ”you almost done with the week. Once you get over hump day, you’ll running to the finish line.” Happy hump day everyone!!!!

I just want everyone to know if there is any kind of hump in your life that you are trying to get over, you’re almost there. Don’t give up, keep going!!!! It gets the toughest when you are almost at the finish line. You have the strength to pull through. EVEN THE STRONGEST NEEDS A BREAK

When you are at your lowest, weakest, and just can’t take it any more, the breakthrough is coming. Please believe and know you are stronger, bigger, tougher, and wiser than any obstacle you are facing. No matter if it’s a physical hump, mental hump, emotional hump, financial hump, relationship hump, or work hump. You will conquer and see through to the other side.

Has it been challenging? YES!!!!!! Have you taken all you can take? YES!!!!!! There have been tears shed. You have screamed, shut down, and stressed yourself to no end. But, hold on because it’s hump day and there isn’t a hump big enough to hold you down.

You’ve been here before. Remember?!?! There was another time you thought you weren’t going to get through, and you did. Think back, and pull from that strength. Rememeber how you felt when you finally conquered and got over the hump. Expect and anticipate the victory of WINNING!!!!!!

In the meantime, be patient, pray, and do your best. The rest has been worked out already. Remember it’s not our timing that is the best timing.

So on this hump day, go be great. Be your best self. Tough times don’t last. You will outlast any hump that you face today, tomorrow, next week, next month, or next year. We will have humps. But it’s how we climb that hump and what we do in the process that makes it manageable.

Have a great day!!!! Happy Hump Day!!!!!

RosalynLynn

Be you so you can be free.

I KNOW I’VE GROWN BECAUSE…

There have been a few changes I’ve noticed about myself. At first I wasn’t really paying attention but then I know I’ve grown because of certain lifestyle habits.

The first thing I noticed of how I’ve grown is I have to have desert right after eating. Also the sheer desire to even have dessert is unusual for me. I never really been a sweet eater. But my tastes buds are changing. I used to give people the side eye when they’d eat desert right after a meal, but I’ve come to enjoy dessert more right after. Now when I say dessert, I am talking about a slice of cake or pie. After breakfast a warm cinnamon roll is so good. In turn, chips and candy I have no desire for. My tastebuds have clearly matured.

The next one I noticed is I’ve become more focused, stressed, and obsessive about making sure my home is comfortable and inviting. Of course I used to clean all the time, but I focus more on energy, aroma, and comfort. I enjoy being home and it should be the place where my family feels most peaceful. On a daily I try to create an environment of peace and calm. Furthermore, when people come over I want them to experience a sense of peace for a moment.

Another way I’ve grown and is shocking for me, is I will purchase “just because” flowers. I never really was a flower person, but as of late having some fresh colorful flowers in the house is natural happiness. The colors creates a visual sense of joy. The scent is calming and adds fresh aroma to the house. And the smile they bring to your face every time you walk pass is contagious. Purchasing yourself some flowers just because is a quick way to boost your mood, spirit, and self esteem.

The older I get it seems the more my scalp gets dry. I’ve had to completely switch my hair routine because the dryness is out of control. I’ve always had dry skin, but never really scalp dryness. I can remember the days my mom and grandmother used complain about their scalp. Now here I am grabbing all the moisture I can get.

Lastly I know I’ve grown because smooth jazz is my preferred music of choice. Outside of gospel and a podcast I really can relax and enjoy smooth jazz. Listening to it in the car, at my office, while I’m cooking, and at night has become very relaxing to me. The days I used to dread riding in the car with my elders and listening jazz, has now become my kids. It’s amazing how the tide turns.

Well that is just a few things I have noticed lately. As a part of my self care, I intentionally make it a point to be in tuned to my being. I want to be consciously aware of my body, mental, and emotional being. I enjoy being able recognize the differences and how I grow and mature. Life is a journey.LIFE…We Only Get One We are forever going to evolve. I don’t want to regret not enjoying the process and being in the moment.

Growth is a process.

RosalynLynn

Be you so you can be free.

3 SELF CARE MISTAKES I MADE AS A STAY AT HOME MOM

I totally loved being a stay at home mom and low key want to go back to being a stay at home mom. However, there are some mistakes I made being a stay at home mom. Here are some of my mistakes and tips for you, so you won’t make the same one’s I did.

First off, I didn’t think of it as a job. I felt like I wasn’t bringing in actual income, so I wasn’t contributing. Because I wasn’t “working” outside the home I felt I couldn’t ask for help. Nor could I even think about saying I was tired. That couldn’t been further from the truth. Let me tell you, running and maintaining a home is work. It’s constant managing and balancing everything. All the cooking, cleaning, and laundry you do is work and contributing to the home.

Giving your spouse the peace of mind to not worry about anything is a huge contribution. Whatever you do to make the home run smoothly, save money, and provide comfort is constant support. So yes, therefore it is a full time job and then some. There isn’t a dollar amount you can place on that.

The second mistake I made as a stay at home mom was not practicing self care. Once again because I didn’t work outside the home and had small babies at home, I had to be in sweats all day. So I thought. In my head, I wasn’t going anywhere on a daily, so why get up and do anything to myself. I really didn’t focus on myself or do much to boost my energy and self esteem. In my mind, I was a stay at home mom and that’s the only thing I was allowed to focus on.

The thought of me not bringing in any income, made me believe I didn’t deserve anything. That went across the board. Clothes, shoes, makeup, vacations, and any thing else I thought would make me happy.

Trust me your kids and partner want you to practice self care. Taking care of yourself is taking care of your family. You deserve to look good, feel good, and have whatever it is you want. You will feel better about yourself and approach the days with more excitement and enthusiasm.

The last mistake I made was not having a hobby outside of the family. I had nothing to focus on to keep my mental intact. Having that breather or moment to myself I didn’t give myself permission for. It is painfully important as a stay at home mom to have your own hobby Self Care: Hobbies and Activities. Something that is completely you. The one thing that gets your mind off of everything and refuels you.

If I could go back, I would definitely make time for myself, create a space for me to do something that makes me happy, and give myself a break. It truly is a honor and gift if you have the luxury to be a stay at home mom. Be thankful and grateful that you have that gift.

Obviously there are many factors that contributed to me having the feelings I did. For starters, I had no support from my family. However, my husband was amazing at encouraging and motivating me. He tried to do everything to make me feel good and a contributing partner. I was looked at as being lazy, messing up my kids because I didn’t put them in day care, and wasting my degree that I received. Because I was young, I began to believe certain things and internalized them. In my mind, I had a completely different point of view. However my efforts, to share and explain fell on deaf ears.

Being a stay at home mom is hard work and time is going to fly by. Take care of yourself First and the rest will fall into place. If you are a stay at home mom, know you are doing a great job. Don’t let lack of support or outsiders tell you any different. Seek support, encouragement, and motivation outside if you have to.

RosalynLynn

Be you so you can be free.

THE ONLY PERSON YOU OWE IS…YOU

I love a good quote. I can spend hours scrolling Pinterest for inspiring quotes to keep me motivated. The best thing I heard this week was, “you owe you first”.

Quote of the Week:

The only person you owe is you. You can’t hire someone to care about you.” Whitney Hedrick.

Please go check out her channel on YouTube. The other day I was watching her and she said that, I nearly fell out of my chair. She was explaining how she came to realize she needed to put herself first. She said I can hire someone to clean my house, pay someone to get my groceries, and even walk my dog. But I can’t hire anyone to care about me.

OMG!!!!! She is absolutely right. In a nut shell, you have no other choice but to take care of yourself and care for you. We heard it all our lives. If you don’t take care of you no one else will. No matter what others say or do, you owe it to yourself first. You can’t pour from an empty cup. KEEP GOING AND PUSH YOURSELF

You owe it to yourself to make yourself a priority. No excuses. There isn’t a such thing as a perfect time. The time is now. Put you first. Invest in you first. And you don’t even owe anyone an explanation.

I heard a coworker say, “I just do it for my kid”. Yes, we all want our kids to have the world. We want them to have everything they want and desire, but not at the expense of you twisting yourself into a pretzel to make it happen. Trust me, I had to learn this. And still have to stop myself sometimes. However, its ok to tell them you’re going to work towards it, save for something, or wait until you are available to do it.

You owe you first. Stop twisting yourself into a pretzel to make sure everyone else is straight. There isn’t anyone in the world who can care for you like you can.

P.S. It is NOT selfish to put yourself first!!!!!!!!!

RosalynLynn

Be you so you can be free.

MOTIVATIONAL AND INSPIRATIONAL: JUST LET IT GO

Whatever “it” is, just let it go. Don’t worry about what they said about you. Let go of what happened at work. Don’t be mad if someone didn’t call you back. Let go of the anger and hurt of not being invited. Just let that stuff go. It’s too heavy, it prevents you from laughing, and focusing on something good.

Just Be You

If you feel wronged, let it go. You can’t change what happen. So often we take things personally, and it literally has nothing to do with us. Remember people project their pain and hurt onto you. They want and need someone else to feel as hurt as they do. Just let it go. The More You Grow…

Let it go and don’t let anyone stop you from enjoying yourself. When we spend time trying to figure out why someone said what they said. Or why they left you out. Did you deserve to be treated so unfairly. You are questioning yourself and trying to figure what you did to make them do what they did. You are internalizing something that has nothing to do with you. That is infectious and grows like a cancer.

Shed the confusion, wondering, and questioning. It’s going to put you in a place of darkness. Once you are in this place of darkness for a while, it will become increasingly hard to get out of.

So, if anything happened this week or today, let it go. Don’t hold on to yesterday’s trash or any other days trash. Get rid of it, before it starts to stink up your mind, spirit, and body. If you still have no answers then you probably won’t get any. And if you do, it most likely, wont make things better. Let it go. Furthermore, it had nothing to do with you. Make a mental note and set some boundaries.

RosalynLynn

Be you so you can be free.