As we now know, self care isn’t just manis, pedis, and masks. You can practice self care everyday anytime of day. TGIF: SELF CARE IS ALL AROUND YOU Here are 5 quick self care tips to refresh and recharge when you need a pick me up.

  1. Make Your Bed
    I know this seems simple. But making your bed everyday is a quick way to make your room feel tidy. You can leave everything as is, but with a made bed, you’ll feel a sense of productivity. It will give you a clean fresh slate at the start of the day. You’ll feel less stressed and thus, boosts your mood. The best thing to do, is make your bed as soon as you get up.
  2. Clean Your Purse
    This is somethings that always gets me in a recharged mood. Throw away old receipts. Get rid of that lose change and start that money jar. Money Jar Saving Method for easy saving Toss old candy and wrappers that’s been thrown in your purse. Bonus Tip: A great way to boost mood and increase confidence is to switch out your purses. I know some women do this daily while others like myself do so seasonally. Either way, it’s a great way to improve overall happiness.
  3. Take Your Vitamins
    We all would love to say we eat 3 healthy meals a day as well as snacks. But that’s just not the case for many. Taking a daily vitamin is a great to boost your immune support and give your body the extra nutrients needed. Set a time and get into a habit where you do it at the same time everyday.
  4. Clean Your Car Out
    As a mom of 3, I would love to say my car is spotless. But that has never been the case since I started having children. Every so often I’ll go out while it’s nice and the sun is shining, and simply throw away any trash, papers from school, water bottles, and anything else my kids left behind. I wipe and dust the inside. Of course, every so often I’ll take it to the car wash and vacuum it out.
  5. Delete, Uninstall, and Clear Phone
    If you really want to give yourself a mental recharge, go through your phone and delete any apps that you don’t use. Or if you’d like a challenge delete an app you spend too much time on. Get rid of all those random photos and videos thats taking up storage. Clear any files or downloads. Delete old contacts, conversations, and numbers that doesn’t serve you.

If you’re feeling like you’ve fell into a slump and need a recharge try these 5 self care tips. Any one of the tips can be done any time and any day of the week. Give you a chance by recharging and refreshing your mind.

Be well on your journey.


Be you so you can be free.

Favorite Iyanla Vanzant Quotes: MOTIVATIONAL AND INSPIRING

I love me a good quote. I have shared some of my favorite Iyanla Vanzant quotes below. I love her honesty and straight forward love. She gives it straight even if it’s hard to hear. A good quote is food for thought. Gives you a light bulb moment to shift your thought process into a different universe.

What Is Meant to Be, Will Be

If we celebrate, support, and nurture ourselves, we will not need anyone else to do it for us.” –Iyanla Vanzant

You have to meet people where they are, and sometimes you have to leave them there. –Iyanla Vanzant

The only way to get what you really want is to let go of what you don’t want.” –Iyanla Vanzant

Stop squeezing into places that don’t fit you.” –Iyanla Vanzant

You don’t get to tell people how to love you; you get to choose whether or not you want to participate in the way they love.” –Iyanla Vanzant

“If you don’t have a vision you’re going to be stuck in what you know. And the only thing you know is what you’ve already seen.“ –Iyanla Vanzant

If somebody had the privilege and the honor of walking into your life, living and growing with you, and they didn’t have the good sense to stay, you need to be glad to be rid of them.” –Iyanla Vanzant

We must inspire ourselves by believing we have the power to accomplish everything we set out to do.” –Iyanla Vanzant

There’s no GREATER battle in life than between the part of you that wants to be healed, and the part of you that’s content remaining BROKEN.” –Iyanla Vanzant

The journey into self-love and self acceptance must begin with self-examination…until you take the journey of self-reflection, it is almost impossible to grow or learn in life.” –Iyanla Vanzant

What does a quote do for you? To me it’s not just a quote or words, it gives me a different perspective and a new way of thinking. Seeing things through a different lens gives understanding and meaning to help you or allow you to help someone else.


Be you so you can be free.


It’s hump day!!!! I tell my kids every Wednesday, ”you almost done with the week. Once you get over hump day, you’ll running to the finish line.” Happy hump day everyone!!!!

I just want everyone to know if there is any kind of hump in your life that you are trying to get over, you’re almost there. Don’t give up, keep going!!!! It gets the toughest when you are almost at the finish line. You have the strength to pull through. EVEN THE STRONGEST NEEDS A BREAK

When you are at your lowest, weakest, and just can’t take it any more, the breakthrough is coming. Please believe and know you are stronger, bigger, tougher, and wiser than any obstacle you are facing. No matter if it’s a physical hump, mental hump, emotional hump, financial hump, relationship hump, or work hump. You will conquer and see through to the other side.

Has it been challenging? YES!!!!!! Have you taken all you can take? YES!!!!!! There have been tears shed. You have screamed, shut down, and stressed yourself to no end. But, hold on because it’s hump day and there isn’t a hump big enough to hold you down.

You’ve been here before. Remember?!?! There was another time you thought you weren’t going to get through, and you did. Think back, and pull from that strength. Rememeber how you felt when you finally conquered and got over the hump. Expect and anticipate the victory of WINNING!!!!!!

In the meantime, be patient, pray, and do your best. The rest has been worked out already. Remember it’s not our timing that is the best timing.

So on this hump day, go be great. Be your best self. Tough times don’t last. You will outlast any hump that you face today, tomorrow, next week, next month, or next year. We will have humps. But it’s how we climb that hump and what we do in the process that makes it manageable.

Have a great day!!!! Happy Hump Day!!!!!


Be you so you can be free.


I bet there are many people who see self care as stressful and complex. In actuality it isn’t. Self care looks and feel different for everyone. Everyone idea of self care is different and unique to them. On the other hand, there are some who don’t even practice self care. Let’s be perfectly honest, not everyone is suffering from depression, anxiety, or mental fatigue. Nor do you need to suffer from anything to practice self care.

If you aren’t a morning person then you don’t have to wake up at 5a.m. If your morning begins at 7a.m. or 10a.m. then that is perfect for you. Whatever your schedule is and what your schedule allows you to do then do it. Most people wake up at 5a.m. to get things done uninterrupted. Many people use that time to get some alone time to themselves. But if your alone time is at night then that works for you. As long as you get the proper amount of sleep and rest. What Self Care Is NOT

A great self care activity is reading. However, not everyone is a reader. I can read a book like clock work, but my husband not so much. He prefers to read several articles or passages. Either way he get his reading in. If you’re not a reader then that if perfectly fine. There are many other ways to get your brain activity stimulated. Just because many articles suggest reading as a self care activity, doesn’t mean to force yourself to read.

Self care doesn’t have to be stressful and it isn’t. If you aren’t a planner then don’t buy a planner and feel the need to use it. Some people are natural planners and that works for them. If you use your phone or like to wing it, then that is your business. No one can tell you it’s wrong.

If you like to pray or meditate in the afternoon instead of morning that is your business. Self care is for self. I journal but not everyday, and that works for me. My workout is later in the evening, opposed to morning. I like to use my mornings to get things done.

Self care shouldn’t be stressful for you. You have the right to indulge in self care or not. Take the inspiration and implement it in your life how you see fit. If you try something and it doesn’t suit you, oh well. The goal is to ensure you are your best self for you.

Lastly, no one practices self care 365 24/7. Live your life to be the best you you can be.


Be you so you can be free.


I am my own worst critic and I need to stop being so hard on myself. There I said it. For some time now I’ve come to realize that I have been extremely hard on myself for no reason. Well I take that back, I do know the reason. But that is for another post. I had to tell myself to get out of your head.

You can’t be everything to everyone. Also you can’t help everyone. Lastly, you can’t be what everyone needs you to be. I now know that I was applying too much pressure on myself to be what everyone needed and wanted me to be. I felt if I could help then I should. However, if I couldn’t I always felt then I should find a way.

Now I just say no without explanation. I don’t feel bad for saying no. Nor do I figure a way for someone. Also I had this thought process of I could never not do something. If I found myself sitting down for more than an hour, then I would begin to feel like I am wasting time. I had to get up and do something. When it is perfectly ok, to sit and do nothing.

Recently I began acknowledging how well of a job I was doing at keeping my routines. I told my husband the amount of work I get done before I go to work is amazing. Now because I do have a specific routine Monday thru Friday, by Saturday it’s every man for themselves. But I had to enjoy the fruits of my labor that I put in during the week and say I do a good job. And guess what, there is nothing wrong with saying I do a good job, I did a good job, my skin is glowing this morning, I cooked an awesome dish, or whatever you conquer.

If you are constantly criticizing yourself, not think you’re good enough, or not giving yourself a moment then you need to stop being so hard on yourself. Give yourself a break, compliment, and let it go. JUST LET IT GO Get out of your head. Don’t beat yourself into a grave trying to prove you are a good mom, worker, wife, or whatever else title you hold.


Be you so you can be free.


There are certain things in life that we expect and want. However, there are a couple of things that we have to be ok with never receiving.

lemon photo on person s thigh

The first is an apology. I’ve come to learn and accept in certain situations an apology isn’t going to happen. If the apology has to be asked for then you probably better off not getting it. Some people may not see a reason to apologize for many reasons. Either they aren’t remorseful or they don’t see anything of what they did was wrong. Most likely if you have to explain or twist yourself so they see your point of view and hurt, then if the apology does happen you’ll most likely feel its not from the heart.

The best way to deal with that is to know your role, apologize for your part, if any, and adjust the distance in that relationship going forward. We all want the apology we receive to be genuine and from the heart. If it’s anything other, its going to create a spiral of emotional arguments.

The next thing we may never get is the void we feel from a particular person. This could be a parent, sibling, or partner. Who ever we may seek love, affection, and validation from that is missing, we have to understand it’s not going to happen. first of all, the time that you needed and wanted it the most has passed. Therefore, it won’t mean the same or weigh as much. Because the 8 year old in you is looking for something, the 35 year old won’t be able to receive it the same. And that is perfectly ok.

The best way to move forward is acknowledge what it is or was you needed. But don’t blame said person. Because guess what, if they knew better they would have done better. Maybe you are asking something from someone that they don’t have, can’t give, or never received it. Understanding the other persons background and story will allow you to have empathy. OPEN YOUR MIND FOR UNDERSTANDING Whatever it is you are lacking or seeking, give it away abundantly.

The last thing that we may have to be ok with never receiving is closure. When wanting closure or answers we have to be careful. Most often waiting for closure and answers are holding us hostage from moving forward. Questioning why and wondering about different outcomes is preventing us from learning the lesson and growing from the experience. We’ve heard it a million times, if God put a period on something don’t you go trying to make it a comma.

When you don’t have answers or closure, focus on yourself. How you can be a better person to yourself and others. Learning triggers and behaviors in others so you won’t put yourself in certain positions again.

There is a lot we are going to get out of this one life we have. On the other hand, we will lack certain things. Either way, we must know we are still worthy of all our hearts desires, hopes, and dreams. Of course each person or circumstance will differ. But these are three things that most of us hold our breath for.


Be you so you can be free.


The truth will set you free is something we’ve heard a million times. But what does it really mean? Your truth is yours. Simply. The truth about your experiences. Truth about your feelings. The truth about your thoughts and emotions. Your truth is yours and no one can tell you its a lie or you’re wrong.

Your truth is yours and you must own it like you own your house or car. The one revelation I had this past weekend is telling the honest gut truth, will release and relieve you. The key is to not give a surface answer. You know when we say things like, “I feel some type of way.” What way? What are you feeling? Or when we say, ”I don’t like what they said.” Who said what? Is it how they said it? When they said it? Was it the intentions or context of what they said? In order to get better and heal from the tear, we have to say what the injury is so it can be treated correctly.

I had a moment this weekend with a family member who I previously expressed a feeling and concern to. They took what I said and immediately through it in my face the first chance they got a a moment. I had to ask myself why was I mad, angry, upset, hurt, and crying. It wasn’t that they repeated or brought up my moment of vulnerability. It was the fact they intentionally used it like a knife to hurt me. The conversation had nothing to with what I told them. But at the ready, they had it locked and loaded ready to use against me at the first moment they could.

That’s what hurt. I don’t feel guilty or bad about expressing my true feelings to them. I still believe and stand by my feelings. The act of intentionally trying to make my feelings or experience wrong, inaccurate, or not valid is what hurt. Especially coming from someone I love and I want love from. See there is another truth. I had to say, yes I want love and affection from them. Even though they hurt me, I still love them, wish them well, and want nothing but good things for them in their life.

So when I say tell the truth and it will set you free, it will. Once I said exactly what made me upset, I felt ok with moving forward. I don’t feel like I need clarity, an apology, or hold any bad feelings. Because I do know hurt people, hurt people. I can see their pain and why they wanted me to feel as hurt as them. Even though it had nothing to do with me.

No matter what truth you need to speak, say it loudly. If its regarding your job, say exactly what you don’t like. What are you lacking from your job or career that you need and want? Your truth about your relationship or marriage, speak it. Be specific and detailed about your truth so you can be set free. YOU OWE YOU…FIRST The truth about your finances, home life, lifestyle, or anything that you need to be honest with yourself about, speak it. You won’t learn what to do next if you don’t tell the truth. I’ts like going to the doctor complainig about your knee, when your arm is actually what’s bothering you.

Just like forgiveness is for you, your truth is yours and is for you. Speak your truth so you can heal, grow, and be better for yourself. Your truth isn’t wrong.


Be you so you can be free.


Sometimes we outgrow relationships and that’s ok. People come into our lives for a reason. No matter how well they develop or dissolve we outgrow the relationship. It’s perfectly normal and ok to outgrow some relationships.

If we outgrow a relationship that doesn’t mean its a bad thing. Two people have grown into two separate paths that doesn’t aline. The career path we choose takes us into different directions. Furthermore, any distance apart can help the relationship outgrow. The personal life we lead, takes us into different directions. LOVE YOURSELF MORE THAN ANYONE ELSE

Not everyone is meant to be in our lives forever. We would love to have that one friend since childhood. Or that college roommate that kept us company. Hey Beal. Luv U!!!!! I’m so blessed and grateful to still have my college roommate in my life. But anyway, just because we outgrow a relationship doesn’t mean you’re not going to ever talk to them again. It just means the things you used to have in common isn’t shared.

We don’t just outgrow relationships, we may outgrow the job we’ve been at for years. I’ve heard people say they outgrew their hairstyle. Also one may outgrow the neighborhood their in and want to move. We outgrow the music we listen to, the television shows we watch, and personal style preferences. It’s ok.

I know for me, something as simple as what I like to eat has drastically changed. My tolerance level for certain foods isn’t as high. My choice in music has shifted. I always say if it hurts my ears I can’t listen to it. How I like to entertain myself most people would probably think its boring. I enjoy being different, taking a risk, and challenging myself.

We aren’t supposed to stay the same day after day. Year after after. As we grow our taste changes. What we want and like shifts and adjusts. Also our point of view transform as we grow. So of course we would outgrow some relationships. I know its hard, but growth of any kind is good.

However, if someone isn’t happy, excited, or encourage you to keep going then you know the time has expired on that relationship. I know its scary but you’re going to develop some amazing new relationships along the way.


Be you so you can be free.


I totally loved being a stay at home mom and low key want to go back to being a stay at home mom. However, there are some mistakes I made being a stay at home mom. Here are some of my mistakes and tips for you, so you won’t make the same one’s I did.

First off, I didn’t think of it as a job. I felt like I wasn’t bringing in actual income, so I wasn’t contributing. Because I wasn’t “working” outside the home I felt I couldn’t ask for help. Nor could I even think about saying I was tired. That couldn’t been further from the truth. Let me tell you, running and maintaining a home is work. It’s constant managing and balancing everything. All the cooking, cleaning, and laundry you do is work and contributing to the home.

Giving your spouse the peace of mind to not worry about anything is a huge contribution. Whatever you do to make the home run smoothly, save money, and provide comfort is constant support. So yes, therefore it is a full time job and then some. There isn’t a dollar amount you can place on that.

The second mistake I made as a stay at home mom was not practicing self care. Once again because I didn’t work outside the home and had small babies at home, I had to be in sweats all day. So I thought. In my head, I wasn’t going anywhere on a daily, so why get up and do anything to myself. I really didn’t focus on myself or do much to boost my energy and self esteem. In my mind, I was a stay at home mom and that’s the only thing I was allowed to focus on.

The thought of me not bringing in any income, made me believe I didn’t deserve anything. That went across the board. Clothes, shoes, makeup, vacations, and any thing else I thought would make me happy.

Trust me your kids and partner want you to practice self care. Taking care of yourself is taking care of your family. You deserve to look good, feel good, and have whatever it is you want. You will feel better about yourself and approach the days with more excitement and enthusiasm.

The last mistake I made was not having a hobby outside of the family. I had nothing to focus on to keep my mental intact. Having that breather or moment to myself I didn’t give myself permission for. It is painfully important as a stay at home mom to have your own hobby Self Care: Hobbies and Activities. Something that is completely you. The one thing that gets your mind off of everything and refuels you.

If I could go back, I would definitely make time for myself, create a space for me to do something that makes me happy, and give myself a break. It truly is a honor and gift if you have the luxury to be a stay at home mom. Be thankful and grateful that you have that gift.

Obviously there are many factors that contributed to me having the feelings I did. For starters, I had no support from my family. However, my husband was amazing at encouraging and motivating me. He tried to do everything to make me feel good and a contributing partner. I was looked at as being lazy, messing up my kids because I didn’t put them in day care, and wasting my degree that I received. Because I was young, I began to believe certain things and internalized them. In my mind, I had a completely different point of view. However my efforts, to share and explain fell on deaf ears.

Being a stay at home mom is hard work and time is going to fly by. Take care of yourself First and the rest will fall into place. If you are a stay at home mom, know you are doing a great job. Don’t let lack of support or outsiders tell you any different. Seek support, encouragement, and motivation outside if you have to.


Be you so you can be free.


I love a good quote. I can spend hours scrolling Pinterest for inspiring quotes to keep me motivated. The best thing I heard this week was, “you owe you first”.

Quote of the Week:

The only person you owe is you. You can’t hire someone to care about you.” Whitney Hedrick.

Please go check out her channel on YouTube. The other day I was watching her and she said that, I nearly fell out of my chair. She was explaining how she came to realize she needed to put herself first. She said I can hire someone to clean my house, pay someone to get my groceries, and even walk my dog. But I can’t hire anyone to care about me.

OMG!!!!! She is absolutely right. In a nut shell, you have no other choice but to take care of yourself and care for you. We heard it all our lives. If you don’t take care of you no one else will. No matter what others say or do, you owe it to yourself first. You can’t pour from an empty cup. KEEP GOING AND PUSH YOURSELF

You owe it to yourself to make yourself a priority. No excuses. There isn’t a such thing as a perfect time. The time is now. Put you first. Invest in you first. And you don’t even owe anyone an explanation.

I heard a coworker say, “I just do it for my kid”. Yes, we all want our kids to have the world. We want them to have everything they want and desire, but not at the expense of you twisting yourself into a pretzel to make it happen. Trust me, I had to learn this. And still have to stop myself sometimes. However, its ok to tell them you’re going to work towards it, save for something, or wait until you are available to do it.

You owe you first. Stop twisting yourself into a pretzel to make sure everyone else is straight. There isn’t anyone in the world who can care for you like you can.

P.S. It is NOT selfish to put yourself first!!!!!!!!!


Be you so you can be free.