HARVEST CONFIDENCE THIS FALL

By definition harvest means the process or period of gathering crops. Through our daily habits, self care activities, and wellness journey we harvest confidence. Planting the proper seeds for our mental, emotional, and physical health will give us the strong confidence needed to sustain this thing called life. Harvesting and planting the proper seeds are important because confidence isn’t a one and done. Confidence is a muscle we must water and exercise daily.

Plant seeds of boundaries within you. I don’ t mean cutting people off. If that’s necessary then do so. But I’ve learned to tell people (meaning family members) don’t call me talking about another family member. When they text how is so and so doing, I don’t even respond to that text. Now, when they text me and ask me how the kids are doing I’ll respond. If someone needs a ride and I have plans, I’ll let them know I have plans I can take you when I’m done. It’s more about not stretching yourself thin to the point you’re burned out.

Another thing I do, throughout the day, take a break. Plant seeds of permission to yourself to take a break. Yes, a day off is good. Vacations are good. Lazy days are good. However, small breaks daily can become more beneficial and effective. During the day at work, if I notice I’ve been going since I sat down at the computer, I’ll stop, and give myself a mental break. Get up. Step outside. Go to the bathroom. Get a snack or something to drink. Most importantly I’ll read a good passage. My go to for this is Hallmarks mahogany.com. The community writing group is amazing.

Plant seeds of protection. If I don’t want to do something or go somewhere I’ll say no. I no longer do so just to keep the peace. So often I’d say yes because I didn’t want them to think I was an ungrateful person or rejecting them by rejecting their invitation.

A great seed to plant is a cutoff seed. Sometimes I can go all day and not realize I haven’t sat down or watched a program on TV. After several loads of laundry, cooking, and taking care of my family, I’ll tell them I’m done for the day. I’m going to do something for me. This prevents me feeling overwhelmed and burned out. 15 DAILY AFFIRMATIONS TO BOOST CONFIDENCE

Lastly, seeds of investing in self. My night time cap is very important to my mental health. It allows me to put a period on the day and have a clear mental space in the morning. Same with my morning routine. Getting ready, making sure I feel my best to present gives me confidence to walk in any room and offer my authentic self.

Harvesting and plating seeds to build confidence takes patience. Start within. What do you mentally and emotionally to feel confident. Most of the time once that happens it’ll spill to the outer.

This fall plant you some seeds of confidence. The confidence you build will give you the motivation and inspiration to go after what you’re afraid to do right now.

RosalynLynn

Be you so you can be free.

HELLO SEPTEMBER

Yup, it’s September 1, 2023. Where has the time gone? For some September is about pumpkin spice latte’s, apple cider, fall festivals, pumpkin patch visits, and my favorite, decor. However, September is exciting because football is back, a plethora of new fall TV shows, and back to school. Lastly, who doesn’t love fall fashion? Fall can be the best time of year for fashion. You get to wear sweaters, boots, layer, and get creative.

While all of that is exciting and great entertainment, September reminds us that the end of the year is quickly approaching. Some stress over Christmas holiday shopping, have they reached their goals, and what are they going to before the clock strikes midnight on December 31. You’ll probably going to see an increase of content on what to do these last couple of months to achieve your goals. How to set yourself up for next year. Or, you should already be thinking about next year. Either way it can be stressful.

Please remember that it’s great content to keep you motivated, on track, and getting your juices flowing for your life. However, consuming the content without filters can cause some to feel like they aren’t doing enough, they have failed at their goals, it’s too late, times running out, or they aren’t working hard enough. When it comes to consuming that information, take the tips and tricks that apply to your lifestyle and create realistic systems and goals to live your life. Leave the rest.

As we say hello September, think about what you need to feel free and light. Just like the leaves fall for the season, what do you need to get rid of that isn’t serving you. If you’ve been stressing over the same thing for months, nothing has changed, let if fall with the leaves. You’ve tried something and it wasn’t what you thought, OH WELL, you tried. Take the good lessons you learned from it, and move on to something else. Get rid of what you need to sleep, rest, and have peace at the end of each day. 7 HEALING JOURNAL PROMPTS FOR A PEACEFUL WEEK

With our hello this month, we’re going to see some new colors bring life to nature. That’s our hint to add some color and life into our daily routine. If you haven’t been one to attend a fall festival find one close to you to visit. Have you been apple picking, to a pumpkin patch (yes we plan to go this year even though my kids are teenagers), or an hayride. The goal here is to find something local, free or close to free, do something that you never done, and explore.

This is a trick I started last year and have enjoyed. This summer we stopped by our local Ford Enthusiast festival that is held every year, but have never went. They had food, live bands, games, and endless Ford cars displayed for one weekend. We had a blast. All it takes is to try.

Say hello to September. Enjoy your lattes, soups, chili’s, and cobblers. Get comfy cozy in your favorite sweaters and live colorful. Your heart, mind, and body will reward you.

RosalynLynn

Be you so you can be free.

MENTAL NOTE OF THE DAY

”I pray you feel from things no one ever apologized for.” – Nakeia Homer

Sometimes you won’t get the apology you need to heal, move on, or get closure from. We have to heal ourselves and be ok with not getting the apology. Yes, this is a very difficult thing to do. LET GO!!!!! You’ve been hurt, wronged, taken advantage of, mistreated, and abused. You didn’t deserve it. You did nothing wrong. In my quest to heal myself, I’ve come to learn that as long as I’ve done what was in my power to do, I have to leave it where it stands. I can’t do my part and someone else’s. Neither can you. Reconcile with yourself you’ve done what you can do. Sometimes they aren’t able to see what you see. Some are just stuck in their ways. They don’t want to see it in a different perspective. 7 HEALING JOURNAL PROMPTS FOR A PEACEFUL WEEK Maybe they’ve been so unfairly treated that it’s too cloudy for them to see clearly. Whatever the circumstances are, being ok without an apology frees you. It also frees them. In the event they do apologize at a later time you’ll be able to receive it and be emotionally strong. No matter what occurred you are responsible for your own healing. Even if you did receive an apology you still have to heal yourself. Enjoy the rest of your day!!!!!

RosalynLynn

Be you so you can be free.

MENTAL NOTE OF THE DAY

”Self care is how you take your power back.”-Lalah Delia

woman wearing white sleeveless lace shirt

When I took my break, yes I needed a break. I participated in every self care activity that promoted good mental and emotional wellness for me. SOMETIMES YOU JUST HAVE TO UNPLUG However you choose to self care, is your business. Depending on what you need, your self care will change. Not only do I practice self care for myself, it’s for my family and friends. It’s about me being the best for me while also giving them the best and most I have to offer without compromising myself. Self care will always be a journey. There isn’t a destination to happiness therefore, your self care will evolve as you grow through seasons of life. For me I keep my self care simple. Don’t make it complicated. Listen to what your body tells you. Last weekend we had so much on our schedule that we had a few moments to breathe. I found myself walking around getting a little anxious. I knew I wanted to do something until it was time for us to go again . However , I didn’t want to start something and then we had to leave again. My husband said, “what are you about to do?” I said, “I’m going to go outside for a walk to clear my head and regroup”. On some days cleaning will help, doing my hair or nails will help, reading, watching something funny, calling and talking to someone on the phone, or taking a nap. Whatever you need to do to remain calm and clear, do it. You’ll be available emotionally to handle your day. Enjoy the rest of your day!!!!!

RosalynLynn

Be you so you can be free.

IT’S THE FIRST OF THE YEAR

Well, for me it’s the first of the year. Today is my birthday and I’ve always used my birthday as my “reset” day, beginning day, or milestone day. Every since I was a teenager I’ve always viewed my birthday as a deadline date to do something or start something . I never wanted a big party or extravagant gifts. For me, I’d wake up and make a goal about what I wanted personally for myself by the my next birthday.

A couple years ago, I turned 40 and that was my big day to cut my hair. I set goals on how I wanted to feel, where I wanted to be mentally, emotionally. My birthday is my first of the year. I love spending the day being me. Isn’t that’s what it’s for? To be in peace and completely me. My plan for the day is to wake up, get myself all dolled up, light my new candle, and sit outside and drink my coffee in one of my favorite mugs.

The simple things and the simple life is what I enjoy. I’ve learned to let things go. Let them be what they are. Not worry about what they could have been or what I hoped for. Time is very precious. I know it’s a cliche, but really it is. Just look it’s the middle of August. If I want to do something, buy somethings, go somewhere, eat something, then I’m going to do it. I understand the purpose of living each day. I won’t get them back.

”Sometimes you need to take a break from everyone and spend time alone, to experience, appreciate, and love yourself.”- Robert Tew

One of my goals was to be more self aware and emotionally strong. Not take things personally. Be confident in myself. Give myself without depleting me. Being honest in my communication. Standing on my boundaries without being dismissive. Not feeling like I have to explain myself. Being knowledgeable, comfortable, and confident in my decisions. Not seeking validation or approval to live or just be me.

I enjoy my birthday. I own my birthday. It’s the first of the year for me. My goal is to continue my quest of emotional intelligence. Using my path and journey to pour into family, friends, and my children. I feel great and grateful for the mental clarity that God gives me. I like me. I love who I am becoming and hope it’s infectious.

My hope for you is to find your own way of feeling free. Whatever that may look like for you. How do you reset, reflect, and recharge? Do you use January 1 or your birthday like I do? Or some other day?

Be well!!!!

RosalynLynn

Be you so you can be free.

IT’S OK, TO BE OK WITH SOME THINGS

This weekend having a conversation with my aunt about this thing called life, made some uncomfortable “things” come up. By the end, I told her sometimes you just have to be ok with some things. It doesn’t make it bad. It doesn’t make it wrong. IT’S OK TO NOT HAVE ALL THE ANSWERS Just being ok, accepting, and releasing gives you the opportunity to grow, heal, and be at peace. Here are some things we just sometimes have to be ok with.

close up shot of keyboard buttons — Photo by Miguel Á. Padriñán on Pexels.com

It’s Ok…

-To not want to be ok
-To not feel ok
-To feel lonely
-Needing or wanting someone around, or companionship
-Not knowing what you want to do
-If your feelings are hurt
-To feel more than one emotion or one way
-To lose interest
-Want something different
-To seek a different perspective than the normal
-To have thoughts of giving up or quitting
-Gain a few pounds
-Have a setback of any kind (diet, fitness, finances, emotions)
-If something or someone isn’t what you expected

”Don’t be hard on yourself. It’s okay to have a moment of uncertainty about life. It’s a transformative period to find your purpose.”

Those are just a few things that came up in our conversation. No matter how old you are or what you’re doing it’s ok. Sometimes we won’t have all the answers or information. We even may not ever get any or all of it. The only thing we can do is do the best we can with what we have. Everything will work out. In many circumstances it’s better to not know all the answers.

RosalynLynn

Be you so you can be free.

BEST THING I HEARD THIS WEEK

”If you want more, then do more. If you’re happy with the relationship you have, then don’t do anything. It’s totally up to you. There is no right or wrong answer.”

One day at work someone in the office got a phone call. Of course they put it on speaker and I was able to hear the conversation. The woman asked if she should call a certain person for their birthday and wish them a happy birthday.

SideNote: I don’t know the exact relation of the woman and person in the office. Also I wasn’t able to get a clear picture on who had the lucky birthday and their relation as well. But it was clear they all knew each and were kind of close.

It was clear from her tone there was an internal conflict. She was confused, wanted to do the right thing, and was looking for the answer either way. You know, we wall have those moments where you just want someone to tell you Yay or Nay. Looking for the answer or validation in your confused state.

When he responded with “are you happy where the relationship is?” And then said “”If you want more, then do more. If you’re happy with the relationship you have, then don’t do anything. It’s totally up to you. There is no right or wrong answer.” I perked up and my antennas went up. You know I love a good quote or food for thought. Favorite Iyanla Vanzant Quotes: MOTIVATIONAL AND INSPIRING

What he said resonated not only in relationships, but in life. If you want more in your career then do more. If you want more in your spiritual journey then do more, if you are ok then do nothing. No matter what the circumstance or situation is you have the power to make the decision. And guess what, because it’s your decision, it’s the right one. What’s right for me may not be right for you. But it’s your choice.

If you are having an internal conflict about something, simply ask yourself are you happy in it’s current state. Do I want more? Do I need more? Am I ok with where I am or what I have? Will I be ok if I don’t get anything? Then answer your own questions. Proceed accordingly.

It will always work out because you resolved it for yourself. Yes, we want others opinions, sometimes validation, and for someone to just give us the answer. But will it be right within you. The choice is yours. Enjoy the rest of your day!!!!!

RosalynLynn

Be you so you can be free.

SOMETIMES YOU JUST HAVE TO UNPLUG

”Almost everything will work again if you unplug it for a few minutes…including you. -Anne Lamott

I took a break. A long break. Sometimes the best thing you can do is unplug and step away from everything. Taking a break gives you your power back, gives you clarity, and energy to continue on whatever path your life is taking you.

One of the best outcomes of me taking a break has been my self awareness. The immense power you have when you can be self aware to know and understand why you respond, react, or do certain things. Self awareness takes courage, patience, and practice. You will go on a roller coaster ride to get to the top.

For about two months, as it became closer and closer for me to clock in for work, I would have heart palpitations, sweaty palms, sudden flow of tears, body was jittery, and a huge lump in my throat. All while spending the prior hour meditating, journaling, and praying. Even after doing all I could, I still had a physical reaction. Even when I got off, all I could think about was what I had to do, what was next, and how I can trick my mind into thinking everything was ok. My weekends felt like quick sand. They would go by so fast and all I could think about is how I didn’t want to go to work.

So I started to listen to my body and the response it was giving me that I couldn’t control. YOUR MIND AND BODY GIVES YOU ALL THE ANSWERS YOU NEED Why am I feeling like this? What is it that I have anxiety about? Do I want to do this? I finally had to admit to myself, that I was psyching myself out and pumping myself up just to go to work. One morning talking to my husband without thinking I said “I am not happy and I don’t want to do this.”

I couldn’t believe I said it, but I felt a huge burden lifted. After I admitted that, it was easy for me to realize how much time I spent convincing myself “it’s not a big deal”, “anybody would love to have that job”, “do you know how many people would love to make the money you make”, and so many other thoughts.

The self awareness gave me the power and strength to not care what others would say or do. Determine if I leave or not. I literally made the decision to do what was best for me and it hasn’t been more freeing.

I have absolutely no anxiety going to work. There isn’t a thought of “ugh I have to go to work.” I enjoy my weekend and my Mondays aren’t blue. 6 TIPS FOR MONDAY MORNING BLUES

In taking a break I also learned what a truly makes me happy. Do you ever have trouble answering that question,”What makes you happy?” Being still you understand, realize, and appreciate the things that make you happy. After taking my power back through self awareness, I was able to confidently say what I wanted my happiness to be like and feel like. Without shame, guilt, or embarrassment.

I love doing my morning skincare routine. It makes me feel like I’m preparing myself for the day. It brightens me not only physically but mentally. My morning skincare routine also gives me confidence and strength to go out and put my best foot forward. I love eating good heart healthy foods to keep my blood pressure and health in order. Drinking water to ensure my body is hydrated and cleansed makes me feel good. Working out, sweating, and releasing negative energy is my mental therapy. Nothing clears my mind daily like a good walk. My nighttime skincare and bath routine calms me, allows me to leave the day that day, and prepare for a clean slate the next.

Unplugging and taking a break allowed me to strengthen relationships, strengthen boundaries, and resolve any limiting factors that was prohibiting me from being me. There was a point in my break that I said aloud for the first time, “the mother I wanted or needed I would never have.” How can I participate in what she has to offer without being so drained mentally and emotionally ? That felt like I lost hundreds of pounds in a day. Again, without guilt, shame, or anger I was able to come to grips and set clear boundaries on what kind of relationship I can participate in.

I have never felt so free, happy, and light.

My mental clarity and self awareness has given me an understanding and healing to want to know how to communicate better. Understand what a person needs from me. Also to be honest with myself and others on what I can offer or not. Amazingly, in a conversation with my aunt, unknowingly, I said “auntie I can’t give you what you need or looking for, but I can help you get to what you need and looking for.”

The fact that I was mentally and emotionally in tuned with myself and empathetic to her, allowed me to create boundaries, validate her, and be honest with her and myself was energetic in my body.

One of my prayers everyday is for strength to do the mission I am handed. Take it from me, it’s ok to take a break. Even if you don’t know what you need or want. If there is too much going on in your head and body, unplug. Sometimes you can do all you can, journal, pray, meditate, and you still need to unplug. To be honest, it’s not even a bad idea to take a break every so often to regroup. Life is going to life. Have a great weekend.

RosalynLynn

Be you so you can be free.

MENTAL NOTE OF THE DAY

”Other people’s idea of you is not your responsibility to live up to.” – Unknown

have a great day sticker on brown surface

The number one reason many are unhappy, stressed, or emotionally tired is because they are trying to live up to someone’s else’s idea of who and what they should be. We never want to let others down. Especially our loved ones. However, even trying to “live” up to a loved one expectation of you, can be very damaging to your mental and emotional health. Growing up my mother had her own idea of what college I should attend. She wanted me to attend nursing school so bad, but that was her dream. If you find yourself trying to prove to anyone you’re good enough or prove your value then you have to take your own power back. WHEN YOU ARE SUFFERING FROM THE DISEASE TO PLEASE In doing so, don’t even verbally express what you are going to do. Redirect your life and path to what you actually want to do or be. When you begin to live in your desires and what makes you happy, the benefit is for you and any relationship. Each day you’ll wake up ready to live through the day. The anxiety of what lies ahead no longer hold you hostage. The relationships that are meant to be, will be. But living for you, without seeking permission, or second guessing is the most freeing feeling. Enjoy your day!!!!!!

RosalynLynn

Be you so you can be free.

LIFE IS GOING TO LIFE

I had to take a little break. Rethink some things. Reset my expectations. I NEED TO RESET MY EXPECTATIONS Basically allowed life to life. I found myself on auto pilot. Just going like a hamster on a wheel. This new position isn’t what I expected, hoped for, or really enjoying for me. So I’ve been doing a lot to give it my all and give it a chance. In doing so, it has caused me to miss time on other hobbies and interest of mine.

blackboard with your life matters inscription on black background

First I made it a point to be intentional about everything I did in a day. One day I looked back and realized by 9a.m. I’m on my third load of laundry. Some will say that’s great. You’re being productive. Yes, I enjoy being a mom and wife. But I’m so much more than that. Which lead me to question can I really have both, a career and family. But I’ll save that for a later post.

While doing laundry, I was also cooking breakfast, rotating the dishes from the dishwasher, straightening the living room, drinking my protein shake, checking the to do list for the day, and getting everyone out the house on time. Sounds good right. Sort of. I became so good at multitasking many things and wearing many hats, by the time I sat at my desk to work my mind was already like “girl give me a moment.”

So now I literally do one thing at a time. I get myself together and come downstairs. Have a moment and drink my protein shake while taking my medicine. Then I’d cook breakfast for the kids. While cooking breakfast I’ll listen to Joel Osteen for some encouragement. After breakfast then I’ll clean up and do any dishes that needs to be done.

Next, I focus on laundry. Make sure the laundry is separated and ready to go. In between time, giving myself permission to sit for a few minutes before drop off. Just taking a moment to breath and just be.

Before work I was also doing too many things. I would finalize and complete any contracts from my freelancing hobby. Manage and list any new items on Poshmark. Respond to messages. Plus try to take notes, edit, and draft a blog post. I had to stop that. Now I schedule time for each. Instead, after drop off, I sit in front of the window enjoying my coffee and the sun or rain if it’s raining.

Lastly, before turning on my computer I would journal for 10 minutes to calm and relax my mind. Me being intentional about everything I do has helped me calm myself. Not feel guilty for wanting to take a break or multi tasking. So often we get multitasking and being productive confused. You can complete one thing at a time and still be productive. As a matter of fact, you’d be more productive.

Even in my evening and night routine I ensure I’m being intentional. I no longer try to cook, fold clothes, clean, watch tv, and then workout. I give myself grace and permission.

If you are struggling to focus. Sleep. Aren’t happy. Feel like you’re on auto pilot. Stressed. Jumpy. Anxious. Empty inside. Numb. Take a step back, evaluate your day and what you’re doing in a day and how much you are doing. Take the cape off. We are human beings not machines. Give yourself permission to slow down. Throughly go through one task. Learn and grow.

You know the eye opener for me was my daughter. My husband and I sat back one day and watched her routine. When they get home from school they’re always hungry. So I try to have something ready or almost ready to eat. One particular day we noticed the plate was on the counter a little longer. We again let her know her plate was ready.

Well she was changing her clothes. My daughter everyday gets out her school clothes. Take her jewelry off and place in the jewelry box in the spaces they belong. Pull her hair out of her face. Freshen up in the bathroom. Then come downstairs and get her plate. Honey she unwinds. I took note.

My night routine I truly enjoy and unwind the day. I have a cut off time for everything. Whatever didn’t get done by that cut off time, oh well. It can wait. I unwind to ensure my mind is clear and my heart is light.

Life is going to life. If you don’t slow down and be intentional it will pass you by. Finding yourself unhappy and unfulfilled.

Are you living intentionally?

RosalynLynn

Be you so you can be free.