I heard someone make a comment about what they wanted people to say about them when they leave this earth. That got me thinking about what I have to offer. In order to have an idea of what you want people to say or the legacy you want to leave you have to know what you offer.

After some reflecting I knew exactly what I had to offer. I want to bring someone a sense of peace and calm in their life. Protect Your Peace And Energy Without judgment and criticism, I want people to walk away feeling like they were validated. It’s not my job to point fingers or tell people how they should live. What I can offer is a ear to listen. My heart for compassion. Sympathy and empathy. And then, hopefully, from there they would have the ability to have clarity and understanding.

Most of the time, people know what they are doing, right or wrong. They know how to correct it. Offering someone my time and allowing them to sort through their detour is what I desire. At some point, we all are going to end up on a detour. Sometimes we just need someone to support us through until we get back on the right path.

With that you’ll need patience. Understanding of yourself and where you are mentally and emotionally. Also knowing your boundaries. In turn, your reward, is also growth and healing. When we love and support someone else in a troubled time, we grow emotionally and sometimes have lightbulb moments ourselves. That’s why it’s always good to use the two ears to listen and leave the one mouth close.

At the end of the day, I want to offer peace, calm, and comfort. Settling someone’s mind and heart will give them endless strength to make the decisions needed going forward. Furthermore, I’m pretty sure they have received a fair share of judgment, it doesn’t need to come from me. What is it you have to offer?


Be you so you can be free.


I live a simple and basic life that I am happy with it. We live in a society where more is a standard of success. The more you work, says you’re more successful. Therefore, you’re more financially free, happy, and living your best life as they say. The more lavish your vacation is, the more successful you are. The list goes on.

Recently, I made the admission inadvertently that I live a simple, basic, and slow life. Whatever you want to call it. I also feel this is my gift that I give to others as well. When I engage with others I know they feel a sense a calm, relief, and can breathe a breath for a moment. When someone come around, they don’t feel like they have to be ”on”. They don’t have to prove what they have, what they know, how much money they have, how much they work, or how big their home is. I find it very refreshing and rewarding that I can provide that for someone.

So how do I live a basic or slow life? I’m am very comfortable with having less. Self Care: Declutter and Make Room for Growth I don’t need to have the latest trends in fashion. I am happy with my couple pairs of pants, which are basic in colors. Several pairs of black and grey pants. I love being able to create multiple outfits with the basic tops I pair with them. Once I find a shirt or pant I like, I will purchase it in several colors. Once I find the style to fit and it’s comfortable I’m not straying away. My wardrobe is pretty basic. I’ve never been one to want to be the center of attention anyway.

The next thing that made me realize I was living a basic life was not having the desire to go on this lavish vacation. Once again, my family was brainstorming on our next family vacation and everything they said was great but I just couldn’t understand why everyday had to be so filled with activity. On the other hand, my simple suggestions was shot down quickly. I would prefer to just be in a cottage in the country with nature and the water. That is an amazing vacation for me. Peace and tranquility. Maybe once I will be able to get out and enjoy the town I visit, but after that I can enjoy the quiet scenery with good food.

This may be a controversial one, but on my birthday I can just take the day off and do nothing. I’m grateful to see another day, however I’d rather spend it so I can remember it. I don’t even need to have a big gift on that day. Just food and spending time with people I love will make a great birthday for me.

Simple things like washing my face and doing my skincare routine makes me happy. Using a new body wash in the shower makes me feel good. Cleaning my home and making it smell good keeps me warm and fuzzy on the inside. Burning candles and binge watching housewives is living my best life for me.

This though came to me after I took notice that every Monday morning, my answer to my coworker when she says ”Ros what you do this weekend?” is nothing. I said she must think I am the most boring person. But I’m not bored or unhappy. I love being able to be in the moment, and remember days, events, and family gatherings. I didn’t like the feeling of going out and because it wasn’t about the event I didn’t enjoy myself or remember what went on.

It’s perfectly ok to enjoy being simple or basic. Our culture and society has us thinking that if you’re not doing the most, then you aren’t living. That couldn’t be any further from the truth. Slowing down and taking a moment to think, breathe, and live literally in the moment is great living. I enjoy my simple, basic, and slow life. I was one never to desire to have all the bells and whistles.

If you like the simple basic things in life don’t let anyone make you feel like you should be doing more. Or there is something wrong with you because you have no desire to be doing more. On the other hand, I’m not knocking anyone who loves the bells and whistles. I love those who have large personalities and can light up a room when they walk in. Whatever your heart desires, you deserve to have it all.


Be you so you can be free.


After a year and some months now, I now have the urge again to wear makeup. The beauty in life is that you can change your mind. You can change your mind and go back and forth as often as you’d like or need to. Probably almost two years ago, I wanted to challenge myself and live my life makeup free. I was having feelings of not wanting to depend on going out without a “mask”.

Everyone knows I was and still is a beauty junkie at heart. I still love all things makeup, skin, nails, and hair. But, I wanted to give my skin a break and just love me in my own skin. I’ve done that now for a little over a year and ready to go out again in makeup.

Throughout the last year, I’ve really enjoyed showing up to world bare faced. In fact, I can say I was more confident in going out naked. I was able to relax and just enjoy giving the world me, authentically. At first, I thought I was going to feel self conscious and was worried about going to the office and not “looking” professional.

That was something I quickly got over. I told myself that me wearing makeup has nothing to do with my job performance. Makeup had nothing to do with how I approach my day. I was still able to go into work and show out.

But you know what, you can change your mind. I now want to get back into putting a little extra time into myself. Because I can. That is one of the reasons I was drawn to makeup and skincare. While experimenting, I’m in my own world showing myself some love. And that’s what it’s all about. Doing something you love and spending time with yourself at the same time.

With that being said, you can change your mind. No matter what decision you made prior. You have the right to say I want to try again. You are under no obligation to stick to a decision. Give yourself room and permission to try again and again and again.

When others attempt to question your decisions, choices, and desires don’t get upset. Simply let them know you’ve changed your mind because you can and its your right. Remember never let others opinions about your life and the choices you make feel any type of way. What you do have nothing to do with others. Now go live your life and change your mind back if you want to.


Be you so you can be free.

Random THOUGHTS…Happy Friday Y’all

We’re 15 days into the new year and it seems it’s been a long one already. I’d thought I give a random post of all my thoughts random thoughts. There is so much going on around the world, in our homes, and on our jobs that can easily get us into the state of “How in the world did I end up here?”

Right now more than ever taking a moment to ourself is crucial to all of our wellbeing. Even if you can get five minutes in, it’s better than none. For example, turn the news off, do not consume that all day. Also turn off your social media notifications for a day or so. If you feel you can’t turn off your notifications just don’t respond, read, or look at them for a day. The goal is to give yourself a moment for clarity and to be with one in your own thoughts.

To sum up, please be mindful of what and how much you are consuming for the benefit of your mental health . This includes your conversations with family, friends, and coworkers. If you have someone at work like I do, who loves to talk about politics every moment of day, find a way to recenter. For me, I either completely ignore them, turn on my radio really low, and zone out. Eventually when I don’t respond or engage they stop or switch the subject. Another way I deflect is to simply say “I’ve had my fair share of politics I’m really not interested in discussing it right now.” Finally, my last resort, is to literally refer the conversation back work or another subject.

That goes for any subject matter that you are tired of talking about or hearing about.

Another random thought that has been heavy on me is to ask yourself what are you condoning, participating, accepting, and accommodating? Right now there are many things that we normalize and gloss over as if its ok, knowing deep down it’s not. Stop twisting yourself into a pretzel, to keep the peace in fear of being left out and talked about.

If it ain’t right, don’t sit well in your spirit, and you don’t want to, then exist gracefully. Just another random thought I’d like to share to help those feeling pressured to do certain things.

I’ve had to come to grips with this subject matter this week. Unfortunately, my mother in law passed away, and me knowing my role on when, where, and how far to extend my support had to become clear to me. I had to step back and say it’s not my mother, my husband has siblings, and I don’t have a say so. The most important was for me to make myself available. I was beginning to struggle on if I was being a good wife. But I had to realize my support is to my husband and my children, who lost their grandmother.

Finally, I come to know and understand that I can’t fix people or save people. I can’t and will not break myself down trying to fix someone else. Also if it has nothing to do with you, it doesn’t concern you, it’s none of your business, it doesn’t effect you or your family, it’s out of your control, or you can’t change it, then let it GO. Don’t be mad, angry, upset, bitter, or hold a grudge. Just be done and let go. And don’t look back.

I’m pretty sure I’m not the only that have some random thoughts that doesn’t seem to all fit. But thats ok, as long as you can acknowledge them. Those random thoughts will fit together one day. Bet on yourself first, this one time, and give yourself a chance.


Be you so you can be free.